


The Language of Metal

by cunttwatula



Category: Tsubasa: Reservoir Chronicle
Genre: AU - Horizon Zero Dawn, Bad Dirty Talk, Journey, M/M, Quick Romance, Tribal Setting, existential crisis about destiny, kurogane is a sex god for no good reason, placetaphagy, unresolved sexual tension becomes resolved
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-06
Updated: 2018-09-06
Packaged: 2019-07-07 13:46:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 43,408
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15909441
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cunttwatula/pseuds/cunttwatula
Summary: An island torn by war and ravaged by sickness pins all it's hopes for salvation on two hormonal twenty year old who can't get it together.Written for 2018 KuroFai Olympics





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey there everyone! If your reading this after 1pm on the 6th then I am back from the dead and going through to make some formatting changes because I was literally falling asleep while posting last night.
> 
> Note that this is a HZD AU though you shouldn't need to have played the game to get it. This takes place a few hundred years before Alloy's story but still contains spoilers for the main story line.
> 
> Okay, let's get to the party and remember! This is a piece written for the 2018 KuroFai Olympics so if you like my work and you feel so inclined please rate at the end. This fandom has been around a long time and is very important to me and it's due to a collaboration between the consumers and content creators for this fandom that we can still hold events like this. So give back to your fandom!
> 
> Prompt:
> 
> Ya’aburnee (Arabic): A declaration of one’s hope that they’ll die before another person because of how unbearable it would be to live without them.

_To live without purpose? That’s difficult to come to terms with. But to live without love? To live without him - that would be - that would be torture._

 

* * *

 

Firelight licks the ground, casting long, moving shadows over the dirt. Around the fire pit much of the village has gathered. Their most beautiful Maidens stand atop upturned logs encircling the fire, facing out towards the crowd, with their arms raised. Their faces are turned towards the darkened sky, they begin to chant as the intensity of the drums builds.

Around them, the Warriors of the village dance with strong decisive movements, as if something inside them cannot be contained. The energy in them builds until they, too, begin to chant and scream.

From this circle is a single path, lined with torches and villagers who chant alongside the Maidens and Warriors. At the end of the path is a tent made of deerskin, stitched together with wood fiber. This the High Oracle’s domain. Opposite the path, across the fire, sits the Warrior chosen to assist in begetting new life.

There’s a resounding scream that comes from the tent and then the village goes quiet. The fire crackling seems out of place amongst the sudden silence.

Moments pass and then the High Oracle emerges from his domain. One blood soaked hand sweeps the opening of the tent to the side as he steps out, the other is in a closed fist that drips with more blood. Atop his head sits an ornate headdress made of metal shards, harvested from fallen machines, they build on top of each other, giving the headdress a shape reminiscent of a mountain face. Antler shaped rotator blades, collected from a fallen Grazer, jut out from the sides.

At his emergence the drums start up again, the whole village devolves into movement and noise. He takes a step forward, the silver chains hanging from the antlers of the headdress glint as they catch the firelight. When he reaches the circle, the Warriors drop to their knees and slap the ground at his feet, their faces follow him with crazed eyes. The warmth of the fire only adds to the humid summer heat.

Though traditional, the High Oracle has never particularly enjoyed the overwhelming noise of ritual. He reaches the center and begins to round the circle, stopping at each girl to stare. As he does, there are lights before his eyes that, over the years, he’s learned no other Oracle has had the capability to see. He knows what he seeks and because of this the lights search for the same thing.

Blue and pink symbols and shapes flash across his vision. A circle grows and shrinks as he accesses each woman until, finally, the circle stops and flashes the same blue. He meets her eyes; she knows. He watches her bite her lip to hide how it trembles. He knows her, young, barely childbearing age by tribal standards. She’s also in love with another - a man who is not a Warrior. A man who will never be chosen as a partner.

He raises his closed fist, revealing the womb he has just birthed alongside the child that is currently feeding inside the birthing tent. He squeezes it, fresh blood runs from his palm down to his elbow where it drips into the dirt beneath his feet.

She lowers her arms, bringing her hands together to form a cradle where the High Oracle places the fresh womb. With both hands he runs his fingers down her face, over her neck, and to the center of her chest where her heart lives.

Even though all girls who are chosen to be maidens are taught the ritual, she makes no movement. Her eyes are distant as she stares out over the crowd, “Eat.”

She blinks and looks to him. “Eat,” he repeats, hoping his voice is loud enough amongst the noise to be heard by her but, not so loud that the others hear. She will be shamed and run out from the village if she refuses, her memory would be erased. Her name never spoken. Her person never acknowledged again.

Mechanically, she raises her hands to her face and does as told. Around her, the other Maidens step down from their perches. Those who had hoped to be chosen weep, openly. This is allowed by the tribe. It is the duty of the Maidens to provide life to the tribe, to make up for the many lives lost in the war.

The High Oracle turns to the crowd, the drums stop, the Warriors collapse from the exhaustion of having done the ritualistic dance for nearly twelve hours. “Mother Arisia has given birth.” The crowd cheers. “From her pain we have been given life, from that life we have been granted purpose, and with that purpose our new Mother has been chosen. She has taken in the power from which life is formed, just like all Mothers before her. She will shoulder the burden of ensuring our tribe does not die. That our blood will not fade from existence.” He pauses. “With the power granted to me by the Metal Masters, I speak for them.”

He looks over the crowd, takes a step forward, and turns back to face the girl. “Bow to Mother Shinala.”

The whole village comes to its knees and bows until their foreheads touch the ground. They bow until Fai speaks, “It is in life that we have purpose, it is in our Mothers that we find life.”

The village erupts in another wave a noise. It always shocks him how much power his words have over his tribe.

His sight is strong, stronger than any Oracle before him, so much so that he often wonders if the village sees him as a person or a god.

He is the High Oracle when he exits his tent in the morning, head adorned with his crown of metal. But, at night, when he returns to his home and removes his headdress, he is less than a man. He is simply a fraud. Simply Fai.

 

* * *

 

Fai lives separate from the Village of Celes, a decision he made when the elders named him High Oracle, a title created to express his superiority over other Oracles. His home lies halfway up the mountain, just beneath the cliff that holds the Gates of the Metal Masters - his place of origin. He was not borne of flesh and blood, instead he comes from metal. He was birthed through the Gate of the Metal Masters and taken in by the villagers. Praised as a gift delivered to them directly from their Masters, Fai was raised in reverence.

He never wanted for anything, even during drought or poor harvest he was fed, clothed, and sheltered in ways not even the tribal leaders were. He never wanted for attention, it was afforded to him in excess by adults and children alike. As he aged, though, it occurred to him that despite living amongst the villagers he did not live alongside them.

Child of Metal. Ender of Bloodshed. Gift of the Masters. Oracle of Prophecy. These are all names he bears in conjunction with his own, Fai. But, when is the last time his name was spoken by another? Was there ever a time where the villagers weren’t shamed into using a title with him? Was there a time where people didn’t praise him for simply living? Was there a time when he was simply a person?

He’d been afforded all the luxury his tribe could offer but, at the expense of an intrinsic part of the human experience - genuine human connection. They hail his birth as the event that ended the war between them and the Nihon Tribe, a war that nearly decimated both villages.

What is his purpose? Born of metal, with no one to guide him into understanding why he, alone, exists in this way.

It was, and is, a lonely existence to live on a pedestal.

When he enters his home, Fai first removes his headdress and places it on a wooden table in the center of the large, rounded tent. Next, he removes the gift he was born with, a triangular, metal earpiece, and turns it over in his hand. The elders say that when they found him, the gift had been lying on his chest. It wasn’t until he was five when he inadvertently discovered what it was for. The day he figured out how to wear it is the day he gained the Eye of God.

He can’t help but to wonder how his life may have been different had he not gained his power. He wonders if he would have become an Oracle at all. Though, he knows he wouldn’t have spent so many years sitting with the village counsel divining their future.

Now, he chooses solitude. At least alone he can be a person. Alone he can say that he doesn’t know the future, alone he doesn’t have to consider the expectations of others, alone he can be Fai.

Alone, he can dream of life outside the confines of his responsibility.

 

* * *

 

They receive word, on a muggy morning towards the end of the monsoon season, that a party from Nihon Tribe will arrive in a weeks time. An emergency meeting of the Elders, Councilmembers, and the Oracles. Alongside Fai, two other Oracles reign. While in the past the duties of the Oracles were equal, the creation of the rank High Oracle altered the functions of the other two.

Now, Fai is expected to take on all divination of the village, as well as perform the rituals for all large scale blessings. His assistants mostly bless houses, hear prayer, or perform minor rituals. Though he’s not a healer, Fai also works among the village healers as his Eye of God allows him to see what others cannot.

He is woken before dawn. It’s the sound of the birds that wakes him but, soon after there’s a knock on his door. “High Oracle, your presence is requested in the village.”

“Is it urgent?”

“That is not for me to say.”

The voice of the poor messenger sounds fearful. He knows nothing of who Fai is. “I’ll be down within the hour.” With a sigh he stands from his table where he has been documenting general logistics of the village. He feels confident that this meeting will be in regard to the recent illness that has befallen the tribe. Dread builds in him, this will be the third time he will have to tell the counsel that he has no indication as to when the illness will pass. His sight only provides one word when he examines the sick: _Antibiotics._ It’s a word he’s never seen before, a word with no meaning. He’s considered it might be a God, or perhaps an event. Either way, even their best healers are at their wits end trying to stave it off.

He adorns his metal eye by placing it over his ear and blinks, so as to activate his second sight. The metal eye taught him a dead language that only he can understand. Learning the language was easy enough though he’s never had a need for it outside of his third sight. He calls it The Language of Metal.

Pushing the entrance of his tent open he looks to the sky. The Eye scans the sky and begins to interpret the information it’s processed. Moments later text appears in his vision.

_Temperature: 26 ℃/80℉_

_Humidity: 80%_

_Humidity levels indicates a high chance of heavy rainfall over the next twenty-four hours. Regional history in conjunction with humidity levels suggest that rainfall will continue throughout the week._

That will be good for the crops. It will also be positive news to present at the meeting.

He dresses himself with a heavy gold collar that hangs from his neck. Golden scales cascade off it like chainmail and drape across his shoulders. The waistband of his pants are fitted high on his abdomen and embroidered with gems from a distant city they trade with. Last, he pulls a long, sheer, and light jacket over himself. The sleeves end at his elbows, they would drape if he were to raise his arms, the hem lands at his knee. Despite how regal his attire is in comparison to the tribe, it is still traditional fashion among his people.

The humidity truly hits him when he exits his home to make the twenty minute hike down the mountain. Fai can nearly feel his hair begin to curl in wake of the damp air. The trail he takes is well worn and lined with torches to light his way at night, or to provide guidance to those who seek him out.

When he emerges to the village, he is immediately surrounded by children. He finds that they often wait for him at the base of the trail. Their little hands tug at his clothes and he smiles at their bravery. He enjoys children, they do not care that he is the High Oracle and therefore he considers them more honest than the rest of the village.

“Fai! Fai! Come play with us!”

“Will you tell us the story of the tribe again?”

“Little ones,” he say as he squats to address them. They gather around him, eyes wide with adoration. “I would love to stay but, the counsel needs me today. Perhaps you can find Oracle Kaia? She would love to tell that story. It’s a favorite of hers.”

One of the girls makes a face. “But yours is better. Plus Kaia never plays with us.”

At this Fai smiles. “Kaia has many responsibilities but, I’m sure she’ll make time if you ask her nicely. Tell her the High Oracle said so. She has to do what I say.”

The children grin. “But, next time?”

“Next time I will tell you a story.”

“A new story?”

Fai tilts his head. There are no new stories. The village has lived in relative peace his whole life and all the stories he knows recount the history of the tribe. There are no new stories to tell.

“Yeah! One we haven’t heard before!”

He’s at a loss, “I don’t have any new ones.”

“Can’t you just make one?”

“Well, yes. I suppose I could.”

The children look between each other, thoroughly pleased with themselves. Their wonderment always puts a smile on his face.

“May I be dismissed?”

“Yes you may.”

He stands and extends his hand over the group of them. “May our Masters make you strong and never let your flame burn low.”

With that they scatter, no doubt to hurry back to their game, and Fai makes his way to the center of their village where the largest structure sits. The tent is huge, measuring nearly ten meters in diameter. The leather that makes up the structure is pulled taught over the wooden frame and inside its painted with scenes from the village’s history. The birth of their people, the building of their settlement, the rift between their ancestors that pushed one half into seceding from the other, the war that followed. There are other events in between but, Fai always finds his eyes drawn to those in specific, much like now as he enters.

The inside begins to brighten as one of the village girls tends the fire in the center, building it to be as large at the tent can manage. Fai is the last to arrive as evidenced by the rest of the counsel sitting adjacent to the hearth. “Sorry for the delay,” he greets, taking a seat at one end of the table. The village leader, Elder Siben, sits opposite him, at the other end. They are equal in power and influence over the village though Elder Siben speaks the absolute gospel.

Siben waves Fai off. “Think nothing of it. The young arriving late gives us less young people more time to amble over here.”

Fai smiles at the old man’s humor. “Of course. I’ll be sure to oversleep again next week.” The table resounds with soft laughter. “But, now that I’m here, perhaps it’s better to begin?”

“Yes, of course.” Siben clears his throat. “This morning a young man from the village across the mountain came to our gates.”

There’s a flurry of hushed whispers, though Fai remains unphased. A dozen questions fire off in his mind but, he knows that if he shows his sudden reproach, it will disturb the counsel. The counsel begins to voice their concerns.

“Beasts! All of them!”

“Why now? What is their reason for requesting aid?”

“I wouldn’t be surprised if they brought the sickness upon the village!”

“The Metal Masters will retaliate. We already have too many sick, what if they curse our harvest!”

Siben raises a hand. “Silence.” He waits for the last of the speaking to cease. “There are many questions to be answered. Even more to be asked. This is, yes, the first we have had contact with them since the end of the war -”

“Praise his Holiness, Ender of Bloodshed.”

Fai brings a soft smile to his face, for the sake of being polite. “You’re too kind.” He turns his attention back to Siben, “Please continue.” Siben nods, accepting Fai’s unspoken apology for the small diversion. “What did the messenger say?”

“He brought news that a caravan would be arriving in a weeks time. The village leaders of Nihon have requested counsel.”

There’s another wave of conversation.

“Silence.” Siben cements his voice in authority. “This meeting will not devolve into chaos. We are here to discuss if we will allow them to enter our village.”

Fai taps his finger against the wooden table. “Did the messenger specify the reason for this -” his mind searches for the word, “visit?”

“No. He only said that it was of importance, to both villages.” Siben raises an eyebrow and Fai nods, “The table is open for comment.”

“It’s obviously a ploy!”

“If Nihon has swallowed their pride enough to come to our gates, they must be desperate.”

“But, desperate for what?”

“Exactly!”

“Perhaps their village is also sick?”

“If that’s the case we don’t have enough resources to help them. We don’t even know how save our own people. Every person that lives is a miracle!”

The table continues to go back and forth. The wounds from the war begin to weep in the hearts of many members of the counsel, at least the ones that suffered the great divide and the war that followed. Fai listens carefully, filtering anger and sadness out of their comments so he can only hear reason.

When the counsel finally begins to settle Siben clears his throat. “Fai, your thoughts?”

He stays silent, collecting his thoughts and processing the concerns of others. “Well, this is not what I expected to be discussing today.”

Siben chuckles. “This is not what I expected of the day either.”

With a breath, he begins. “I know many of the wounds the war left have yet to scar. We lost too many people. I’ve studied the numbers, read and reread the text. Almost half of our tribesmen died in the war whether fighting or as an innocent casualty.” He pauses to let his words sink in. “However, I agree with a sentiment from earlier. How desperate must their village be to request an audience with our tribe? More than desperation, we must remember they, too, have anger inside them. Imagine being so desperate you would have to let go of the anger you feel now to ask them for help. Tell me, what sort of dire situation would our people have to be in to put aside years of bitterness?”

The silence that follows is pensive as the group considers Fai’s words.

“Their desperation is not cause for our hospitality.”

Fai opens his mouth to respond but, Siben leans forward to rest his elbows on the table. “Twenty years.” He looks pointedly at his end of the table, at which the elder members of the counsel sit. “Do you remember how old you were twenty years ago Agis?”

Agis sits up straight, she is the second eldest among the members of the counsel, fourth eldest of the village, and the most vocally combative against the idea of opening their gates. Her eyes roll up to the side as she thinks. “Masters, how many winters has it been now?” Tapping her finger on the table she looks back to the group. “Thirty-seven winters? Maybe thirty-eight.”

“Me?” Siben continues. “I was just forty-one summers. Must seem as ancient as the Old Ones to our younger members.” There’s a light chuckle among the table. “I remember the war. I remember the fallen. I remember the hatred. But, my friends, my confidants, that was a hatred of our generation. Was it not? Our tribe was gifted a new child by the Metal Masters only yesterday, they know not of the war, or hatred.” He leans back in his chair, contemplative. “The tribe of the future is not ours. It is not fair to let _our_ history dictate how the future generation will grow, or not grow.” He meets Fai’s eyes and holds his gaze a long moment.

“Elder Siben,” he addresses because he feels he should.

With a sigh he continues. “I am not long for this world -”

At his declaration there is an immediate rush of noise as the members of the counsel try to speak over each other.

“Silence!” Siben yells over the panic. “I am not dying, yet. Acknowledging I am in the final years of my life is not a declaration of death. Now, as I was saying, I am not long for this world. It is because of this I have decided to renounce my position.” The energy in the room buzzes but, no one dares to speak for fear of upsetting Siben again. “Unspoken, though it may have been, it is only natural that Fai succeed me.”

Everyone turns to Fai but, he is dumbstruck by the turn of events. His jaw hangs open, his eyes have gone wide. “Elder Siben, I-” he tries but, words fail him. He looks down at his lap where he rubs his palms back and forth against his knees.

With that Siben gestures upwards with his hand. “The counsel is dismissed. This matter will no longer be an open vote. Nothing discussed here is to be spoken of outside this tent.”

The whole table is in shock as they stand, wordlessly, and leave the room.

“Fai. You knew this would come to pass, eventually.”

He looks up, finally finding his words. “I’m not fit to lead the tribe. I don’t even live inside the village. I’m just over twenty summers. I-”

Siben stands. “When you were birthed of metal and ended the war, I knew you had a great destiny. Your birth marks the last time the two tribes of this island spoke.” He rounds the table. “Now, they seek an audience. Doesn’t it stand to reason the Metal Masters intended for you to bring peace between us?” Siben reaches him and puts a hand on Fais shoulder to offer assurance. “You were destined for this.”

Quietly, “What if I don’t want to be destined?”

Siben inhales slowly. “Everyone has a destiny. Whether of greatness, leadership, prowess, whatever it may be - destiny is only the inevitable outcome of your decisions.

Fai swallows, his stomach is thick with nervousness.

“Destiny or not. You’re the only one the village will accept as the next leader.” Siben turns, making his way back to his seat. “You care too much about them to refuse but, there is always that option. Sometimes destiny takes the form of sacrifice.” He sits and, again, holds Fai’s gaze. “Regardless, the decision to allow the Nihon tribesmen through the gate is yours alone to make.”

The hearth crackles and spits. His mind has gone blank from over processing all the information he’s received. Then, it dawns on him that Siben is awaiting his answer. He looks up, “I can’t lead. I don’t even know how to make a decision like this.”

Siben shrugs. “I usually go with my instinct. What is your instinct telling you, Fai?”

It’s not a whisper inside him, it’s louder and more determined. He laughs to himself, maybe it’s the call of destiny after all. “We will open the gates,” when the words leave his mouth his heart leaps at the possibility of... anything. He so desperately wants _something_ to happen, for something to come in and change his world, or at least wake him up from the way he sleep walks through his life.  “But, I need time to consider your offer of leadership.”

Siben nods his head, a small smile on his face. “I suppose I can remain head of the counsel until you decide.”

Fai lets out a breath that’s half laughter. “I said it earlier but, this is really not how I saw my day going.”

“Oh-” Siben mocks. “An Oracle who doesn’t know his own future. What a cruel joke the Metal Master have played on you.”

Fai tilts his head. Unspoken, _More cruel than you’ll ever know._

 

* * *

 

The small caravan arrives in six days time. The island isn’t large, but it’s not tiny either. It, likely, did not take six days to travel but, rather they left only a few days ago to allow Celes time to send a response of refusal. When the guards at the gate spot the approaching group, they send a messenger to Fai’s tent up the mountain.

It’s dawn when Fai receives the message. He dresses in his finest garments, the same he wears to village rituals. His clothing is reminiscent of the loin cloths his ancestors wore a few hundred years ago. An ornate belt, heavy with sapphire embellishment, hangs on his waist. From the belt, immaculately white fabric extends to his ankles. The fabric covers both the front and back of his legs but, not the sides. Decency is provided by light blue fabric that wraps loosely around his pelvis, beneath the cloth. He wears a blue robe, sheer, sleeveless, only extending to his hips. His necklace is a silver collar at his neck but, jewels, matching his belt, drape off of it. They extend over his clavicle, like shimmering blue waves. Lastly, the ever present crown of metal - a reminder as heavy as the responsibility it represents.

The village is quiet at dawn. The early morning light filters through a gray mist and deflects in soft purples across Fai’s vision. For a moment, he pauses in the center of the village and stares at the Counsel’s Chamber and wonders if he’s made the right decision.

When they had called the Counsel back to announce the final decision they’d been met with criticism. There were a few voices that echoed Fai’s, calling for a truce between their far removed sister tribe. Though, those voices were largely drowned out by those harbouring contempt. The public’s reaction had been a mix of fear and curiosity, though not unsupportive. After all, who can the public trust if not the diviner of their futures?

There’s guilt in his subconscious. He knows he did not make this decision with the entirety of the village in mind. There are many arguments as to why reestablishing contact with the Nihon tribe will benefit his village but, the decision largely came from his own desire.

In contrast to the stillness at the center of the village the area near the gates is alive with movement. Fai has assigned a handful of tribesmen to help the Nihon group make camp outside the gates. Girls struggle amongst the people with plates of fruit to be presented to both the leaders among the Nihon tribe and the people accompanying them. He’d expected a more hesitant atmosphere but, the people there seem to buzz with excitement.

The villagers at the gate greet him with varying titles to which he nods as he goes to speak with the Captain of the Guard. “Salkov,” he says in greeting.

“Your Holiness.”

“How far is the convoy from our gates?”

“They were an hour out when we sent word. Now, twenty minutes? Give or take.”

Mentally, he goes over his list of things to be done today. He’s called for a large feast at dusk. The maidens of the village are likely already in the great hall preparing to feed the group from Nihon in addition to their own tribe. Before that, they’ve organized entertainment - dance, music, even a short play the children have put together. Dinner and entertainment will continue for three days, and on the final day the tribe will present a gift - they will offer a mate to the strongest Warrior among the Nihon tribesmen. Though their tribes have been separate for two decades, surely they still follow the mating customs, or so Fai has reasoned. Regardless of his personal doubts about the tribe’s custom of choosing mates based on fertility and strength, it is still the highest honor to be given the most promising maiden.

“When you see their representatives approach, open the gates.”

Salkov’s eyes go wide. “High Oracle, you’re not serious.” It’s not a question but, a statement.

“I am. I want to greet them first, so they feel welcomed. This is the dawn of a new age and -” he pauses, unsure of his next words. “And I’m at the front. Let me do as I please.”

“But they approach with beasts of metal!”

At this Fai’s eyes go wide. He is not unfamiliar with metal beasts. They roam the island in small groups, they often come to the fields to bless the harvest - at least that’s what the village believes. Fai doubts any of them understand the true purpose of the beasts set forth by the Metal Masters. They are both a relic and a marvel from the past - the time before the birth of his people.

“Metal beasts? Are the following the caravan willingly?”

“It appears so.”

Fai’s eyebrows draw in concern. Though the beasts are not generally hostile, if they listen to the people of Nihon, and if the people of Nihon were to enact violence - Fai pushes the thought from his head and reframes it. If they have learned to tame the beasts, it is an opportunity for them to learn as well. “Let’s not assign meaning to something we don’t understand.”

Salkov bows his head. “Of course your Holiness.”

They discuss how security will work over the next few days. All diplomats will be able to enter and exit the village freely. The rest of the party may enter with either the diplomats or at scheduled times. They smooth over the final details until a guard at the top of the gate calls down that three people are approaching the main gate.

Salkov looks up to the guards pacing the upper levels of the barrier. “Open the gate!” There’s a large groan as the guards turn the crank to open the wooden doors. “May I accompany you?” He asks, turning back to the High Oracle.

Fai waves him off. “I don’t want them to think we distrust their intentions.”

Salkov drops his voice and looks away, “Isn’t a little distrust wise, my Oracle?”

He recognizes worry in Salkov’s face. He understands what his position in the village is and what kind of fear the people must harbor by his insistence at meeting the party head on but, he _will_ bridge the gap. There’s no explaining _why_ he feels this way, he’s stayed up thinking about this feeling the last few nights. Nobody asked him to take on this responsibility, he could have even declined it, and yet the tribesmen of Nihon are at their gate.

“Distrust will not help the situation.” He gives Salkov a smile and pats his shoulder.  “The Metal Masters have told me such.” He feels bad lying to people who trust in him without restraint. Almost as bad as he feels knowing, _suspecting_ really, that the Metal Masters are not gods... not exactly.

Fai turns towards the gates. His stomach is sick with excitement and nervousness. He’s ready to feel alive at the thought of possibility. He places himself in the center of the gateway, his eagerness keeps his back straight. Then he sees them, their heads crest the small incline before their gate and he can’t contain the way his face pulls into a smile.

 

* * *

 

 _Discomfort_ , is the only word Kurogane would use to describe being inside the gates of Celes. He’d grown up hearing stories of the _Breeding Tribe_ but _,_ he never imagined he’d be setting foot inside the gates.

All things considered, their villages are very similar. Perhaps, this shouldn’t be surprising considering this is the village from which his tribe draws their lineage but, honestly, he’d expected beasts. Expected savages. He’d imagined women being violently bred and evidence of blood sacrifice clearly on display in an attempt to please the Metal Masters. But, no.

There are leather tents that spiral out from the center of the village where there’s a large hall use for meetings between the various factions of power in the tribe, at least that’s what the High Oracle has told them. Speaking of, Kurogane doesn’t know what to make of this _High Oracle._ His parents are old enough to have lived in Celes before the war, in fact his own father had led the rebellion into battle. That being said, he’s heard plenty about the Celes tribe and their traditions but, there was never any mention of a _High_ Oracle and he can’t help but wonder where the difference is.

Moreso, this High Oracle doesn’t align with his preconceived image of an Oracle. He’d imagined a lot growing up. Monsters as a child and disgusting pig looking people as he got older. He’d thought the public would cringe at the sight of the Oracles, knowing that this person was the sole decider of their fate. He’d thought the anguish of not being allowed to love or commune freely would be more palpable.

Yet, the public loves him, they adore and worship the ground this guy walks on. Kurogane has never heard more titles than he has simply walking through the village with the _High Oracle. Your Holiness. Child of Metal. Ender of Bloodshed. Gift of the Masters. Oracle of Prophecy._ The level of respect and reverence astounds him if only because the High Oracle seems to not want it. It’s nearly imperceptible how his eyes go dead at the sound of any of his titles and then come back to life almost instantly. But, Kurogane sees it.

“And this is the Maiden’s Quarters.”

From the corner of his eye he sees his mother flinch at the phrase.

“All of our young women eventually move here to live amongst each other before being-” The High Oracle swallows, and his voice becomes a little tighter when he speaks next. “Before being selected by the Metal Masters to bear children.” This idea makes Kurogane uncomfortable enough to fiddle with the braid at the base of his neck.

The High Oracle turns to them, a bright smile on his face but, there’s something beneath the surface, something close to shame. “We have a similar dorm for the Warriors of the village. Men who choose not to become Warriors are sent to work in the fields and learn other trades.”

Kurogane senses they are supposed to be impressed by this, or that they are at least expected to have some sort of reaction. He has plenty to say in regard to the tour they have been given but, he’d promised his father he would behave - scolded as if he were still a child and not Nihon’s future Chieftain.

His mother speaks first. Her voice is soft, “I remember my time here. It was -” she pauses. “It was not unpleasant. It was nice to be among my friends.” She turns to his father who snorts.

“As if you ever stayed there, Tsubame. I could always find you where the water meets the sand.”

“Sachihiro! Hush, the Maiden Mother might hear you and come drag me back to my bunk.”

Tsubame and Sachihiro gaze at each other, seemingly removed from their current conversation. Kurogane rolls his eyes. His parents can manage to be lovably disgusting even in the most bizarre situations. The Oracle seems to think so too if his ears turning pink is any indication. He scoffs as how embarrassed the Oracle is, how sad to have never seen true love so openly.

Kurogane clears his throat. “Chieftain. Priestess.”

Their titles bring them back from their conversation.

“The Oracle is waiting.”

“Oh, um,” Kurogane using his title seems to catch the Oracle off guard. “We’ve toured most of the village. We’ll head towards the Counsel’s Chambers at the center of town. I’ve arranged for a large breakfast to be served upon our arrival.”

“Then we’ll discuss the nature of our visit?”

The Oracle’s attention turns to Sachihiro. “Of course, Chieftain.”

 

* * *

 

His eyes are drawn to the son of the Nihon Chieftain. Fai doesn’t mean for this to be true but it is. It isn’t attraction necessarily, no, it’s something else entirely. He, Kurogane, as Fai knows him, is interesting to look at.

There’s a scar over Kurogane’s right eye, it must be intentional as all the men of Nihon appear to have one. The scar runs from the midpoint on the right hand side of his forehead, through his eyebrow, skips his eye, and ends in the hollow of his cheek. His skin is mostly bronze, no doubt darker from the summer but, also dry leaving his forearms ashy. Jagged fingernails bitten too short and torn cuticles that Kurogane picks at, even as the meeting is called to order.

Fai has to tear his attention away from him. With no reason to think so, Fai knows that he could keep staring at Kurogane and continue to find new features to note. New things to uncover.

The start of the meeting begins with formal introductions though very few are actually needed among older members of the counsel. They are all familiar with Sachihiro, Chieftain of the Nihon tribe, and his wife Tsubame, Priestess of the same. Of course they are, the two of them had been key figures in the revolt against Celes. But, after introductions are made, the Elders take no time to get to the heart of the matter.

Agis speaks first, cutting off Siben as she does. “What business do you have with Celes?”

Siben says nothing but, Fai sees how his lip rolls into a tight line. He’s angry Agis has spoken out of turn but, too proud to scold her in front of their guests. Fai isn’t though.

“That’s a very blunt way of putting it Agis.” Fai leans over the table and catches her gaze before looking back to the tribesmen of Nihon who sit across from Agis, Siben, and Fai. He opens his mouth to readdress the table but Kurogane speaks.

“Sickness. Our people are sick.”

“Kurogane...” Sachihiro trails off.

“What? Why pretend that we are here for a reason other than our purpose? Let’s just get to the point.”

Tsubame puts a hand to his shoulder. “Political niceties are important.”

Across the table Kurogane crosses his arms and - is he pouting? Fai bites his lip to keep from laughing.

“He’s right though, our people are sick. They’re dying. More and more each week.” Tsubame pauses and looks to her hands. “It’s become an epidemic.”

Sachihiro takes over. “We made contact in hopes that Celes might have experience with this. We’re hoping you may have a cure.”

The members of the Celes counsel exchange a series of looks, communicating between each other how to proceed. Eventually Siben nods, giving Fai the floor. “What are the symptoms of this illness?”

“A red rash. High fever. Tenderness in the neck. Trouble eating or drinking.” Tsubame pauses and flexes her hands over the table. “It’s affecting children mostly but, there have been a handful of adult cases.”

“Dirty blood.” Fai hears Agis mumble. By the stiffening of the people across from him they have heard too.

“Mind yourself Agis. The same illness has befallen us as well.” A hush falls over the table. “It started about one lunar cycle ago. We-” Fai bites the inside of his lip. “We have no cure. Our situation is not improving.”

“We saw the first signs of it at the beginning of summer. It seemed manageable but, then - then the children started contracting it and,” Tsubame gasps. “They are so much more fragile than adults. It wasn’t until the children started falling ill that death became the likely outcome. Our best healers have found nothing to cure or taper the symptoms. We just - all we can do is try to make the children comfortable.” Her voice is choked when she finishes.

The table falls silent only to be broken by Kurogane. “So, this trip was for nothing. We left our people without leadership to turn towards and now we must go back and tell them what? That we failed?”

“Kurogane, please.” Sachihiro sighs. “You know we haven’t failed.”

Beside him, Fai can see Siben’s interest has piqued.

“We know now that both of our tribes are without a solution. I believe it is in both Celes and Nihon’s best interest to work towards a solution together.” He set his attention on Fai. “Have you had any deaths, yet?”

“Two.”

Sachihiro nods. “It was slow at first in Nihon. But the illness started coming in waves after a few weeks. I hate to be negative but, it’s only a matter of time.”

“What do you suggest?” Siben speaks for the first time since introductions. “Surely you did not make contact with us without a contingency plan in mind.”

“Well,” the Chieftain smiles, “One of us has a contingency plan.” He turns his attention to Kurogane.

Fai finds himself more focused when Kurogane is given permission to speak. “We journey across the ocean to Hitsuzen.”

“Across the ocean!” Agis laughs. “We don’t have boats that can make that journey. Neither do you, or you wouldn’t have come here.”

“It’s true. We do not have boats that large-”

“But we have the Metalrays.” Kurogane says, effectively cutting Tsubame off.

Fai can feel his jaw hanging open. “The Metalrays?” Disbelief washes over him. Metalrays are large metal beasts that reside in the ocean. They never come too close to shore, so very few people have seen them up close. Fisherman have been known to have rare encounters with them but, even then it’s hard to believe stories of beasts whose backs are size of the tent they sit in now, with tails as long as ten grown men, and glowing blue markings that cover the tops.

“The Metalrays,” Kurogane repeats.

There are too many questions on his tongue, all Fai can manage is, “How?”

Kurogane smirks as if he’s won an argument. “We have the power to control the metal beasts.”

“High Oracle,” Siben turns to him. “Is this true?”

“I-” Fai stumbles, “The guards at the gates said they had arrived with metal beasts but, I didn’t see it with my own eyes.”

“And you didn’t bring this to me immediately.”

He feels scolded, his voice loses an edge of confidence. “It seemed to be a matter that could wait.”

Siben turns to their guests. “Explain.”

Kurogane leans forward. “Our village sits on the southern shore of the island, opposite the direction of Hitsuzen. The southern shore is rough, hard to even fish from during the fall and winter. It pushes the Metalrays too far from our shore, too far for our fishing boats to travel. That’s if they could even make it through the bay. But, your waters are calm and the Metalrays circle your shore all year. If we were given access to your shore, we could take a fishing boat out to open water and wait for one to come to us, then I could take the Hand of the Masters and tame the beast. Tamed beasts act on the will of others. If I can tame one it can take us to Hitsuzen.”

The counsel sits stunned. Where are they to begin processing this information? Traverse the ocean? Tame the metal beasts? Tame a _Metalray?_

After a moment Fai speaks. “If.” He meets Kurogane’s eyes. “You said ‘If I can tame one.’ Does that mean you haven’t in the past?”

Kurogane holds his gaze. “No. Not a Metalray. But, metal is metal. What’s the difference between a Watcher and a Lancecorn? Their size? And yet, we’ve tamed both.”

“Are you -” Fai pauses, unsure of what he’ll say next. “You’re confident you can do this?”

“Yes.” There’s no hesitation between Fai’s question and Kurogane’s answer.

Fai sits back in his chair, from the corner of his eye he looks to Siben for support. “This seems unrealistic,” Siben states firmly.

He closes his eyes at Siben’s words. He knows Siben is only speaking pragmatically but, for a moment something fantastical was possible.

The group seems to have come to an impasse. “But, what’s the alternative?” Sachihiro looks at his wife while he speaks. “The Hitsuzen fleet only comes twice a year. It’ll be another three or four lunar cycles until their next visit. Best case scenario they have a cure with them. Realistic scenario, we either have to cross the ocean to retrieve a cure and come back. Or they don’t have a cure at all. And what happens between now and then? People die. That’s the reality.”

“If they don’t have a cure, then what? We’ve sent men across the ocean on a Metalray, with no idea if they will survive the journey, for nothing.” Agis makes her first helpful contribution even if her tone is less than diplomatic.

“We aren’t asking for men.” Kurogane clucks his tongue. “We don’t know how much weight the Metalray can hold, or if it’s realistic for more than one or two people to use it as travel. Myself and one of my men will make the journey. The only thing we are asking for is to use your shore.”

“No.” Fai’s surprised by his own voice when he speaks. His mind finally catches up to his words. The other emissary should be a representative of the Celes tribe.... The other emissary could be - “If there is a cure, how do we know it will be distributed equally between the villages upon your return.”

“My word?” Kurogane sounds put off.

“History aside, we’ve just been informed our village is about to befall a deadly epidemic. We would be letting you use our shore but, that doesn’t mean you have to return to our shore.”

“Like I said. The Metalrays can’t navigate the currents this time of year.”

Fai shrugs, “Could always return to the cliffs. Calm water on a clear day. The water’s deep enough the Metalray can take you right up to the cliff. Just scale the mountain face.

Kurogane frowns. “You would see us if we tried to get to the cliffs. From your gates.”

“Not at night. Even if you didn’t use the cliffs, two people isn’t a lot. It would be easy enough to sneak ashore and make your way back to Nihon.”

“That - We -” Kurogane pauses to collect his frustration. He meets Fai’s eyes with a hard stare, “I wouldn’t do that.”

“This isn’t a trial. I am not trying to be accusatory but, we need assurance.”

Kurogane glances to his father, obviously looking for support in this matter. A moment passes and Sachihiro turns to them. “I agree with the High Oracle.”

“What?” Kurogane spits. “How am I to trust a - a Celes _Warrior_ , no, a savage _rapist_ at my back?”

“Savage rapist?!” Agis stands. “What know you of our tribe young man?” She looks him up and down. “Born of dirty blood. Life unchosen by the Metal Masters. Sin. Your village is sin,” she spits her words. “That is why your children die.”

Siben slams his hand on the table “Agis! Si-”

Tsubame laughs softly but, there’s a quality to it that silences the room. “Maiden Mother Agis,” she uses Agis’ retired title. “Then what of Celes? Befallen to the same illness and yet you assert there is no sin here?”

Siben sighs and rubs the inner corners of his eyes. “We are not here to discuss a matter that has already been settled.”

“Agreed.” Sachihiro echos Siben. With a sigh he continues, “You’ve answered your own question my son. If you cannot trust a Warrior of Celes, what reason do they have to trust us?”

Fai watches the same pout from earlier return to Kurogane’s face before is disappears. Kurogane’s face softens until it’s an off putting yet, serene stare. “Fine but, I get to choose who goes.”

“No-”

“Agreed,” Siben cuts Fai off.

A whisper, “Elder Siben -” Fai tries to plead only to be placated by a stern gesture of Siben’s hand. With that he feels his essence wilt. It hadn’t been a fully formed idea, not even a clear thought that he could be the one to go but, he’s disappointed nonetheless.

“You may spend the rest of your time in Celes surveying our men and -”

“No need.”  Kurogane leans over the table with such intensity that Fai recoils into his chair when Kurogane’s gaze sets on him. “You.”

“Absolutely not!”

“Agis,” Siben sighs like he’s scolding a child.

She sets her hands on the table and looks only to their village leader. “We _cannot_ let the High Oracle leave. He is too important to the foundation of our tribe, what if something were to happen?”

Fai thinks quickly, devising a way to push for this opportunity. “It would be a tragedy to the village.” Fai looks to Agis. “But, so will an epidemic on our children. If I am the condition, I will go.”

Across the table Kurogane’s eyes go wide and his mouth pulls into a line as if he’s trying not to scream.

“Then,” Siben addresses the table. “It seems we have come to an agreement.”

 

* * *

 

That night, the village comes to life with the sound of celebration. Bonfires burn bright across the compound, each drawing a crowd who make their own music and dance. Once the people are fed and the children have been put to sleep, they will announce Fai’s departure. For now, he walks through the village feeling as though he’s an observer among his people.

Fai can’t help but wonder how they would react if they knew he wanted to go not for the village but, for himself. His small world of prophecy and ritual and obligation is about to expand exponentially and.... Is this the first he’s ever felt excitement? No, there must have been other times? But, he can’t think of a single one.

Perhaps it’s too narcissistic to think that way. Of course he wants to help the village. Of course he wants to negate the epidemic. Of course he wants to make this journey for the greater good of his people. And yet, none of those reasons matter as much to him as the possibility of a little freedom.

Is it selfish to want for yourself more than others? Fai can’t help but ask himself that very question. His heart races with apprehension as the announcement draws nearer. He can’t stop turning the events of the meeting over in his. He worries he’s made a decision that will alter the very foundation of his life and the life of his people on impulse.

The group of Maidens he’s been talking with excuse themselves to go mingle among some of the Warriors. This leaves him without an audience. He watches the people who have gathered lean in close to speak to one another, haul each other up to dance as they laugh and sing and - none of them are paying attention to him. A soft smile comes over his face as he falls back towards the upper part of the village where fewer people are, being careful not to draw attention to himself. All he wants is a moment of peace to rethink what he’s already thought about over and over.

He walks with no destination in mind. Up ahead there are voices coming his way. There’s no good reason to avoid them but, he does. He glances back and forth looking for a place he can remain unseen and sees a smaller, unlit, residential path that he chooses to follow. The people pass without noticing him. This path seems to offer his sought after solitude so he continues to follow it. He’s almost at the farthest point where the path reaches a blunt end against the foliage when he sees the silhouette of a man sitting on the stoop of a raised tent.

Fai doesn’t immediately recognize the man which alarms him for a moment before he remembers there are guests among them. “Hello?” He calls out, successfully catching the man’s attention. “Are you lost? I’m-”

“I know who you are.” This stops Fai short. There’s a slight slur to the words he notes unconsciously. He watches as the silhouette takes large gulp after large gulp of, what he can only assume is alcohol. “High Oracle. Ender of Bloodshed. Gift of the Masters. Child of-” he burps. “Child of Metal.” The man snorts. “Do you even have a real name?”

His question seizes Fai by the gut, it’s the same question he’s been asking himself his whole life and - he swallows something that tastes like anger - how _dare_ they presume to know him. His instinct is to shame him, bring this behavior to the attention of Sachihiro and let it be handled that way. Instead, he walks forward.

When he can finally make out the details of the silhouette, he can feel his heart catch in his throat. “Kurogane,” his surprise is evident.

He rolls his eyes at Fai and takes another sip of his drink. He doesn’t respond in any other way.

“I-” Fai tries to form a sentence on the fly. “What are you doing here?” He settles on the question after a beat.

“Drinking.”

“I can see that. It’s a lot by the sound of it.”

“What? You going to tell my dad on me?”

Fai smirks, Kurogane’s defiance is, well, what is it? Endearing? Maybe, charming? Either way, people don’t defy him. It’s different, at the very least. “And ruin my fun?”

“ _Your_ fun?”

“Yeah. My fun,” Fai comes closer and takes a seat on the stoop next to Kurogane. The other eyes him with unveiled skepticism. “What?” Fai laughs the question.

“You drink?” Kurogane’s face still reads as doubtful.

He shrugs. “Occasionally. Is that strange?”

“You just don’t seem the type. All pure and shit.”

Pure? Fai rolls his mouth together to hide his amusement. He’s never thought of himself that way. He holds out his hand for the bottle. There’s a long moment where neither of them move. “Well, come on. I can’t prove you wrong if you don’t give it to me.”

With some reluctance Kurogane complies and lets Fai take the bottle from his hand. He watches him, eyes narrowed as if he’s unconvinced that Fai can be anything other than High Oracle. Holding his gaze, Fai tips his head back and takes a small sip.

To put it simply, Kurogane is unimpressed. “Really?” He raises an eyebrow.

Fai’s eyes go wide at the challenge. A grin pulls over his face, cocky enough to say _I can’t believe you’re edging me on._ With purposeful movement he tips his head back and takes a generous gulp. He manages to swallow most of it but, the burn causes him to cough resulting in the remaining liquid to dribble from the corner of his mouth and land on his clothing.

Kurogane doesn’t laugh but, he does snort in amusement.

“Oh, shut up.” Fai coughs again, not quite recovered.

“You talk a big game,” Kurogane says as he leans back on his elbows.

Fai’s face pinches with mild annoyance. “You challenged me!”

“Pft. Don’t blame me. You took me up on it.”

“Yeah! Because -” Fai comes up short. Flustered is a word Fai’s never had to used to describe himself but, that’s the only word his mind can supply to describe how he’s feeling. He always has it together, always has the upper hand, always has a mask to hide his true feelings behind. So, then, why does he feel he’s been exposed by a simple exchange with a man he doesn’t know?

Taking a moment, Fai steadies himself. In the background the cicadas buzz, alcohol sloshes in the bottle Kurogane took back when Fai started coughing. The drums from the center of the village are faint but, still audible. He reasons that if he can take control of the conversation and turn it back on Kurogane, then he can regain control of himself. Problem is, he’s not sure what to say.

Silence passes and Kurogane make no move to end it. It’s awkward for reasons Fai can’t understand. He swallows. “So...” He draws out the word. “We’ll leave in a two days.”

“Listen.” Kurogane says standing. He finishes off the bottle and tosses it to the ground. “I don’t care.”

Fai closes his mouth, obviously thrown off.

“If you die, I won’t care. Just because I see you for what you are, doesn’t make us -” there’s a pause where Kurogane swallows. When he speaks again his voice borders on disgust, “-doesn’t make us friends.” He starts walking away. “Don’t slow me down. I’ll leave you behind without looking back.”

Shock hits him first, briefly followed by anger but, ultimately, he feels overwhelmingly embarrassed. There’s little Fai can do but, to sit there and watch Kurogane walk away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is 75% UST, 10% RST, and 15% stupid boys


	2. Chapter 2

Fai stands on the beach staring towards the east as the sun crests the horizon. Its rays glitter like gems when they hit the water and turn the sky from black, to blue, to purple. To the north there are patches of white and fluffy clouds. Fai’s relieved, though he’s only ever lived on the island his skin burns easily, so the clouds will provide much needed coverage for this stretch of their journey. 

Watching the sky like this, it’s easy to feel as if it’s just another sunrise on just another day, with the ocean spreading itself across the sand and wind rustling the palms. However, it’s anything but another day. It’s the day he will step foot off the island, one of the _only_ two people who have ever set out across the ocean.

He’s wandered off to watch the sunrise but, behind him he can still hear the various discussions going on between the few people who have been given permission to see them off. They haven’t told the village the true purpose in Fai leaving the island in order to prevent panic. Instead, they’ve told them that Fai is leaving for a political conference in Hitsuzen with a vague explanation as to what that entails. Oracles have been assigned to Fai’s usual duties so, in this way the village won’t change. However, a group of Nihon men have been given permission to camp outside the village in order to wait for Kurogane’s return.

“You leave today?” He hears Kurogane speaking to his father.

“Yes. Soon after you depart myself, your mother, and half our men will return to Nihon. Our people need the comfort of leadership but, you will have men waiting for you upon your return.”

There’s no audible acknowledgement from Kurogane and after their exchange that first night Fai refuses to turn around to look at him in fear it will be some sort of loss on his end. Since that first evening they’ve been adamantly ignoring each other. Regardless, he will not break first. He will not beg for attention from a man who said plainly he wants nothing to do with him. 

“Be careful.” Tsubame says gently. There’s the gentle smack of a kiss to the check. “Remember what I told you.”

Fai hears Kurogane huff.

“We love you,” she says. It’s at this point Fai tunes out of their conversation and hears footfalls coming towards him.

“High Oracle, a word?”

He turns to Siben. “The man who raised me never needs to ask permission to speak to me.” 

“You say that often and yet...” Siben trails off, trying to make light of the words to come. 

Fai rolls his eyes as a gentle smile pulls across his face. “And yet.”

There’s a pause, neither of them have had to say a goodbye that could mean  _ forever. _ “The villagers will miss you. We all will.”

“I know. I’ll be keeping everyone in my thoughts.” 

Another pause. Siben sighs. “I want you to know that I hope you find what you’re looking for.”

Fai’s eyes go wide. “I - I’m going for the cure. I hope I find it too.”

“No. I hope you find what it is you need to make your heart full.” He puts his fist to Fai’s chest, right over the center. “You said it yourself, I raised you. There’s no secret you can wholly keep from me.”

Siben’s words bring tears to his eyes, which he wipes away quickly. “I’ll be back soon. I promise. Nothing I find could stop me from returning.”

“Your Holiness!” There’s an annoyed tone to the voice. Fai looks over Siben’s shoulder to see Kurogane standing at the boat that will take them out to waters where the Metalray swim. Kurogane crosses his arms to show his impatience.

Fai frowns at him before looking back to Siben. “We should go. It’ll be a long journey across the ocean.”  
“Indeed.” Siben steps aside to let Fai pass. “Be careful,” Siben says loud enough for Fai to hear once he’s a few feet away. 

Fai looks over his shoulder and nods. When he reaches the canoe Kurogane turns away from him. “Get in the front and grab an oar. I’ll push us off.”

He wants to argue that Kurogane isn’t in a position to be giving  _ him  _ orders but, a glance to the people standing on shore to see them off on a life or death mission tells him that now isn’t the time to argue. Instead he smiles brightly. “Of course, Kuro-tan!”

Kurogane’s eyes narrow and his jaw drops for a split second before he snaps his mouth closed in a thin line. He doesn’t speak but, his stare speaks volumes in regard to his annoyance. 

It’s satisfying to see Kurogane so easily succumb to irritation. Fai had been feeling as though Kurogane had  _ somehow  _ won the upper hand with their exchange a few days ago but, now he feels he has a card to play. He stands in the center of the canoe and raises both arms above his head to wave to their audience. “Bye!” 

Kurogane pushes the boat before Fai has a chance to sit, effectively causing him to tumble forward. He catches himself with his hands and scowls at Kurogane who wears smug grin on his face. “Get the oar dumbass!” He barks at Fai as he jumps into the opposite end of the canoe.

Fai fights his desire to ignore Kurogane and sit unmoving on his side of the canoe. He reasons this isn’t a helpful course of action and takes his place at the front to start rowing in time with Kurogane. 

Once in open water, Fai looks over his shoulder, “How far do we have to go?”

“Why, tired?” His tone is flat.

Fai frowns. It’s a simple question and yet, Fai can hear the underlying insult. Conditioning tells him to keep his mouth shut and be pragmatic but, who would know if he didn’t do just that? The realization turns his frown into a grin. “ Aw , your concern is so cute, Kuro-soft.”

“I-!” Kurogane’s indignation is apparent. “That’s not my name!”

“Right. Kuro-nay. That’s it, right?”

“No, you fucker!”

“I think you mean  _ High Oracle. _ ”

“I definitely meant  _ fucker! _ ”

Fai turns around. “Somebody is in a bad mood~” he singsongs.

“Masters! You’re so annoying.”

“Wouldn’t have to be if you’d answer my question.” He turns and locks eyes with Kurogane. “How much further?”

Seeming to weigh his options, Kurogane holds Fai’s gaze. “Were close.”

They paddle for another half hour. Fai can no longer see the island when he turns to look but, the Eye of God does register that he is just over six kilometers from the shore.

“Here’s good.”

“Okay,” Fai says laying his paddle inside the boat. He turns his whole body to face Kurogane. “Now what?”

In the expanse between them are their supplies. Rations for the journey, currency to exchange at Hitsuzen if need be, and weaponry. Fai isn’t weapons trained, at least not with any proficiency. He had to go through the same training  regimine as the rest of the boys in the village as a child but, his eventual station in the village hierarchy never called for him to use or hone his skills. He’d been gifted at the javelin as a boy and has brought one as his only weapon in hopes that his body will remember his training the way it remembers ritual.

Kurogane has brought a few different weapons. Among them Fai sees a bow and  shalaylee with a cylindrical metal end. He watches Kurogane take the  shalaylee in hand, secure it to the boat with a rope  teather , and plunge the metal end into the sea. “We wait.” He says crossing his arms.

Hours pass and Fai is convinced he’s going to die of boredom. Even Kurogane looks discouraged. He leans his head against the side of the boat and drags his finger along the water’s surface. Regardless of how mind numbingly bored he is, he still hasn’t spoken to Kurogane. That doesn’t mean he hasn’t spent an abhorrent amount of time staring at him. 

His initial assessment of Kurogane was right. Fai could and, literally, has spent hours looking at him. He wants to ask about the scar on his face to understand its meaning. Moreso, he wants to touch it. To run his fingers along its edges and map the plains and valleys of its texture. 

There are other things of course. Kurogane had been wearing full dress with a cape pulled over his shoulders while in the village. Now, his arms are bare and Fai can see how they are thick with strength and decorated with scars of the hunt. That strength extends to his forearms where his tendons visibly flex as he cracks his knuckles repeatedly. Kurogane doesn’t even have  to  _ intentionally  _ flex to demonstrate how tone his body is. While Fai can only see his arms, he imagines.... Oh, how he imagines!

Attractive. He admits to himself that Kurogane is unbearably attractive. Attractive and insufferable. 

 

* * *

 

It’s late afternoon when Kurogane starts thinking his plan might not work. His father and himself had discussed that it might take more than one day to lure in a Metalray using the Hand of the Masters but, Kurogane had been confident his strategy would yield near immediate results.

The Oracle hasn’t spoken to him which is something he thought he wanted but, he’s beginning to think it would be nice to have  _ some  _ degree of company. Though he doesn’t speak to Kurogane, he does stare. He doesn’t even pretend that’s not what he’s doing when Kurogane catches him. He just tilts his head and slowly turns away until he’s looking out over the water again.

It’s in the doe eyed look on Fai’s face that he finds his own irritation. If the idiot is going to stare at him, the least he can do is provide an explanation. Or act embarrassed when caught. Or, really, do anything other than systematically  _ ignore  _ him.

These thoughts roll over in his mind. He’s never considered himself a person in  _ need  _ of attention. He is, however, quickly learning how much he hates being purposefully ignored.  _ Especially,  _ by spoiled idiots of savage tribes with blonde hair and sapphire blue eyes and - has he been staring too? The thought irritates him further, his personal tension mounts until it finally bursts!

“You’re quiet.” His words sound stupid to his own ears. 

Opposite him Fai sits up, his face pulling into confusion. For a moment he just stares - Masters! - how much staring can this fucker do? “We’re not friends. What is there to say to each other?”

“We could plan a course of action for when we make landfall.”

Fai looks around their ship purposefully. “If we make landfall?”

At his implication Kurogane frowns. “We will make it and when we do, we’ll need to both be on the same page.”

“We could have already discussed that but, considering how you’ve gone out of your to avoid me since the celebration...” he trails off with a flippant wave of his hand. 

Kurogane takes a breath through his nose.  _ Maybe _ he deserved that but, he’ll never admit it. He is the warrior who will be the next Chieftain of Nihon and he won’t lower himself to apology. “Don’t be an asshole about this.”

Fai tips his head back and laughs. “Me? You think I’m-” he laughs again. “Oh. Kuro-cute,” his eyes narrow. “Only one of us here is an asshole.”

Before Kurogane can think of a response Fai stands causing the boat to rock gently. He pulls the string at his waist and opens the wrap he’s been wearing before shrugging it off. Kurogane is so caught off guard by Fai’s actions that his only option is to stare. It’s when Fai starts to take his pants off that Kurogane says something. “What are you doing!” He can feel his face burning with embarrassment. 

“It’s hot. We’ve been in this boat all day and I feel gross.” He fiddles with his ear and drops something onto his discarded shirt. “So, I’m going to swim since nothing’s happening.” 

Fai’s pants hit the floor and Kurogane makes a conscious effort  _ not  _ to look at Fai’s  nethers . Because who doesn’t have the impulse to do that? It’s human instinct to be curious about your,  uh , reproductive  _ competition, _ so to speak. Regardless, Fai doesn’t seem to notice his struggle and dives into the water. 

Kurogane watches the water’s surface, after all there’s nothing else to watch. Seconds pass and Kurogane is forced to consider that the idiot might have jumped in not knowing how to swim. He looks over the side, no bubbles. He tenses.  _ Fuck. _

On his right side something breaks the surface but before he can turn he’s assaulted with a spray of water. “What the fuck!” He turns roughly, rocking the canoe. On instinct he plunges his hand in the water to haul Fai up, there’s no way it’s not him. 

From his left there’s another spray of water. “Stop swimming under the canoe!” He shouts, wiping water off his face. 

Finally, Fai breaks the surface and takes a huge breath. Without thought, Kurogane lunges across the boat to dunk Fai’s head, only to trip on the supplies and tumble head first into the ocean. He surfaces with more force than one would think a fall into the ocean would allow and turns until he spots Fai at the side of the canoe with an infuriating grin on his face. 

Kurogane shoves water at him. “Fuck you.”

“You did that to yourself!”

“You came after me first.”

Fai just sticks his tongue out. It’s in that action that a thought comes to Kurogane’s mind. Fai’s  _ different _ . He seems, somehow, relaxed being away from the island. He doesn’t know Fai well enough to know what the root of the change may be but, he can recognize that it’s there and Fai seems more like a person than he did before. 

It’s not a thought he wishes to voice but, it has served to  _ very  _ slightly soften his view of Fai. So, he stares at him with a half-hearted glare. How much more staring can they do? He opens his mouth to say something. Maybe, to suggest they get back in the boat? Then there's a sudden shift to his surroundings. He senses a presence near them but, there is nothing in his immediate sight.

The water beneath them begins to ripple and vibrate in large circular waves. Despite his extensive training as a warrior  _ and _ hunter he panics for a moment not knowing what the  _ fuck  _ is happening. The water below is too dark to see anything but, he knows whatever is coming is underneath him where he’s completely vulnerable to an attack. If only he could  _ see _ what is coming for him...

Across from Kurogane, the dread on Fai’s face is evident. He’s looking at Kurogane as if his life is flashing before his eyes. And why wouldn’t he be? This is Kurogane’s plan. His mission. And Fai is just a casualty that’s here because he  _ thought  _ he was playing a smart card by giving the Celes counsel an ultimatum.

Kurogane is not a heartless man, at least not at his core. It’s because of this that he feels slightly responsible for making sure Fai gets back to the island... even if that feeling has  _ just _ now surfaced.

Unspoken, they both scramble for the canoe. Kurogane supports the side as Fai climbs in. Immediately, Fai turns and offers his arm to haul Kurogane up. It’s then that Kurogane notices a glowing blue light below the surface and his panic falls away as a grin breaks out over his face. “The  shalaylee .”

“Whatever is in the water is not going to be harmed by your fucking stick!”

“Just give it to me, idiot!”

With a groan Fai scramble for the  teather and rips it apart before tossing the  shalaylee to Kurogane. He catches it effortlessly and dives below the surface. The lights are rising and when Kurogane sees the surface of the Metalray he stops and adjusts the positioning of his body so that he lands in a crouch as it rises. He holds the activated metal end of his  shalaylee to the Metalray. The lights atop the metal beast glow brighter before settling back to their original intensity and then he breaks the surface, the Metalray right beneath him. 

For a long moment Kurogane just stares at the surface of the Metalray in disbelief. He’s  _ tamed a Metalray.  _ The largest metal beast he knows of. A grin overcomes his face, and he lets out a disbelieving chuckle. They can get to Hitsuzen now.

_ They.  _ He remembers that Fai exists as he comes down from his victory. He stands and turns until he spots the canoe which, thankfully, hasn’t capsized. The waves from the gigantic metal beast rising seem to have pushed the canoe off to the side of the creatures body. Fai’s face is one of abject hysteria but, he seems  to slowly realize that this is  reality and then he starts laughing maniacally. 

“What are you laughing at?”

Fai seems to gulp for air in order to calm down. “I just - This is real. You really - you really-” The words keep getting caught in his throat. He finishes in a whisper. “You really tamed a Metalray.” 

The awe of the moment begins to pass. After all, they still have so much further to go and can’t spend too much time basking in their achievement. He looks to Fai, from his vantage point Kurogane looks down into the canoe. Fai gazes up at him, wet hair plastered to his face. His chest bare and unblemished from violence. Kurogane’s eyes linger a moment too long and he glances down, which doesn’t help because it’s then he sees Fai’s nakedness.

He turns away to hide the burn of his face. “Put some fucking clothes on and let’s get the hell out of here.”

 

* * *

 

Watching the Metalray surface is hands down the most amazing sight Fai has ever seen. Nothing can take away from it. Not even the fact that they have not been able to get the Metalray to move. 

“Dammit!” Kurogane screams. “Fucking move!”

Fai rolls his eyes. “Yelling hasn’t helped all morning. It’s not going to help now.”

“Well, I don’t see you making any suggestions.”

Fai turns his upset into purposeful annoyance. “I’m  _ thinking~ _ ”

The previous evening they had decided it would be too dangerous to attempt traveling at night with a machine neither of them had any experience with. So, they’d slept and intended to set out first thing in the morning. It’s approaching midday now and they’ve made no progress.

“What do you do to control the machines on land?”

Kurogane’s eyebrows pinch together. “Touch but, usually they just follow unless told not to.”

“So, in other words, you have no idea what to do since that’s not working.” Kurogane doesn’t say anything and Fai groans. “I’m so  _ bored _ !”

“I don’t care,” is Kurogane’s immediate response. 

With a roll of his head he looks back to their supply filled canoe that they have tethered to the Metalray. Despite the size of the machine there is no secure place to put their gear. The Metalray itself is a huge circular beast with a tail three times as long as their canoe. At the front is a strip of glowing blue light. There are other lights across the surface. They extend from the front light in six straight lines, three of which eventually divert left in intervals so they  spoon each other. The other three do the same but veer the opposite direction. At the center is a concave crater, about a half meter across, with a light in the center.

_ It’s just a machine _ \- It’s a simple thought but, it gives Fai an idea. He hasn’t been wearing the Eye of God since taking it off to swim the day before, he hasn’t seen a reaso n t o and it’s been a nice break from the duty he feels by adorning it. That in mind, he reaches over the side of the Metalray and pulls the bag containing his clothing over to him. He finds the earpiece in a tiny pocket on the inside, grabs it, and sits up on his knees as he sets it in place. The lights blink before his eyes. Symbols flash across the screen as it takes in the surroundings.

Turning back to the center of the Metalray he scans the surface. As the Eye locks on to the crater there’s a sudden and sharp noise in his ear. A circular ring of blue expands from around the beast and then little cubes start to fall into place across Fai’s vision building a - he squints - it’s a map. 

He’s seen visuals like this in the past, he knows he can manipulate them. Holding his hands over the area he pulls them together until he can see both the island and the  _ peninsula - _ that’s a new word - that Hitsuzen is likely on.

“What are you doing, idiot?”

He’d almost forgotten Kurogane was there. He looks back to the map. “You have the Hand of God and I have the Eye of God.”

“What does that mean?” 

“It’s not your concern. I just," he sighs now having heard the calculated indifference in his own voice. “I can see things others can’t. I didn’t think it would be helpful until a minute ago.”

Kurogane looks uncertain but, must know they are out of options. “Well, what do you see?”

Fai cocks his head. He hadn’t expected Kurogane to so readily believe him. Not that he would have explained it anymore than he already has. “A map.”

“Really?” Kurogane leans forward as if getting closer will allow him to see it too. 

“Yeah. I see our island and the shore of Hitsuzen.” Further inland there’s a brightly glowing light on the map. There’s another on his island. He’s not sure what to make of the lights so he doesn’t mention it. The will of the Masters will bring him there if they so wish it. 

“So you just  _ see _ the map. That’s not helpful.”

“It’s not unhelpful,” Fai mumbles not entirely focused on Kurogane. He puts his hands over the map and pulls them outward to magnify the Hitsuzen shore. Eventually, he can even make out the topography and a little blinking light appears. At this he bites his lip, he has an  _ idea  _ of what this blinking, pink dot might do. This is either going to work or they are going to have to admit failure and go home. 

Fai uses his finger and taps the pink dot. Nothing happens. Kurogane must see a degree of disappointment on Fai’s face. “What?”

“Nothing.” What else can he say? He gets the feeling that any explanation will only further irritate Kurogane. Fai senses Kurogane doesn’t do well when things are out of his control, not that he’s any better. It’s his  _ purpose  _ to divine the future.

“You’re a fucking liar -”

Kurogane is cut off by an unearthly groan. Second to a moment of panic, Fai realizes it’s the sound of huge metal plates moving. There’s the sound of something breaking water and Fai turns to see the tail surface and begin moving side to side. The Metalray lurches forward with such force that they both have  to quickly find purchase or risk being thrown off. 

The Metalray builds speed until the ocean water begins spraying up and out on the sides. It’s another moment of disbelief for both of them. He’s breathing heavy for no reason as he looks over and sees the awe on Kurogane’s face and then he falls on his back laughing. 

This is now the most amazing thing he’s ever seen.

 

* * *

 

It’s dusk. Fai sits perched on the front of the Metalray. Kurogane has made multiple comments on how if he falls off he’ll likely die from being run over by the huge metal beast and, yet, he can’t bring himself to care. He’s already experienced so much in just the last two days that dying might not be so bad. At least he could say a small part of his life had been exciting. For a moment he’d tasted what he’d craved for so long. A sense of freedom. 

“Hey!” Kurogane shouts from the center. “We should stop to sleep!”

Fai stands and comes to sit by him, knocking their knees. All things considered, the Metalray provides a smooth enough ride that they are able to stand and walk from end to  end . The rumors had been true, the Metalray is huge! Fai guesses it’s at least ten meters in diameter. “I can try.”

“What do you mean  _ try _ ?”

“What makes you think I have any better of an idea of how to work this thing than you? I got lucky last time.”

Kurogane crosses his arms and Fai bites back a grin. Does Kurogane even know how  _ cute  _ he looks when he pouts? Even his scar, which Fai assumes is a ritualistic testament to Kurogane’s machismo, doesn’t help him look anything less than...  _ charming. _

Fai looks at the center, his Eye adjusts, and the map comes into view. He hasn’t done much experimenting with the Metalray’s interface earlier since just getting the damned beast to move was accomplishment enough. He uses his hand to move the map out of his vision. Next comes a screen with moving charts that reads  _ Diagnostics.  _ He moves the screen away and another panel comes up. The top left corner is a bright word that reads  _ Autopilot  _ next to which is a non-highlighted word that reads  _ Manual.  _ He’s not sure what  _ Autopilot  _ means but  _ Manual  _ is familiar - it should mean he can control it himself, right?

He touches the word and it begins to glow while the word  _ Autopilot  _ goes dark. In the center of the screen, circles with numbers surrounding them become visible. They remind him of sundials. Each dial is labeled with a word  _ Dive, Speed, GPS.  _ Well, two of those make sense. Suspecting he shouldn’t adjust the  _ Dive dial _ which is set at zero, or the dial labeled with a word he doesn’t know, he turns to the  _ Speed  _ dial. He uses his whole hand to turn it from an eight to a six. The Metalray skips on the water but, is noticeably slower than it was before once it’s settled. One by one he moves the speed dial until it’s at zero, brining the Metalray to a stop.

 

* * *

 

Their first night sleeping at sea had been cold. It’s warm during the day but, the open water cools quickly once the sun sets. The Metalray’s lights, however, provide just enough warmth to keep them comfortable. Kurogane’s lying on his back, face turned towards the sky. 

The stars look different here. Not that he would voice it but, it’s  _ uncomfortable  _ being away from home. He’s never spent a night outside Nihon, at least not without his fellow tribesmen. Hell, he’s never spent this much time on open water. 

Fai is close by. Maybe, a little more than a meter away. His back is to Kurogane but, he can tell Fai’s not sleeping. His breath is too shallow. They still aren’t talking much, which is fine by him. Really, he’s  _ super  _ okay with that. He can focus on the end goal better that way. At least that’s what he tells himself. 

It’s not true. He has so many questions and anytime he tries to talk to the Oracle it just devolves to irritation. Stupid face. Stupid voice. Stupid smile. Stupid hands -  _ Masters.  _ Why does he always notice a man’s hands? Of all things to fucking notice....

Fai’s hands are thin. You can see the blue of his veins on top. Long fingers, angular knuckles. Soft. They look soft. Unlike his which are rough and calloused, so rough they sometimes catch the fabric of his clothing when he runs his hands across them. 

Attraction is a strange thing. This  _ thing  _ he feels is inexplicable and it lacks an emotional root. It’s physical... All of it is physical. There’s not much to like about Fai. He’s annoying. Loudmouthed. Too much in his own head. So much so that, at this point, Kurogane’s only so  _ rude  _ to get a reaction. Fai’s kind of lifeless in a way, like he’s mimicking emotions and not experiencing them. That was his first impression, anyway. Even though it’s still a fair assessment by his standards, he’s starting to see the cracks Fai tries to cover up.

He’s resigned himself to another silent night when Fai speaks, “How do you do it?” His voice is soft, almost like he’s being mindful that Kurogane might be sleeping.

“Do what?”

Fai sits up and crosses his legs, his back to Kurogane. “Tame the metal beasts.”

He’s the only one in his village with the ability to tame the beasts and even he isn’t sure  _ how  _ it’s done. He only knows that he scavenged a part from an ancient machine in the forbidden ruins. “I’m not telling.” 

Fai’s response lands somewhere between annoyed and disappointed. “Kuro-lame.” He wishes he could see Fai’s face when he speaks.

“What about you?”

“Huh?” Fai looks over his shoulder.

Kurogane knows the answer before he even voices the question. “How do you talk to them?”

There’s a glint in Fai’s eye when he speaks, “I’m not telling.” His voice is sprinkled with delight. 

Something about Fai’s answer is both amusing and terrifying in that it really shouldn’t bring so much attention to the hollow feeling in his stomach.

_ Well, that’s annoying. _

 

* * *

 

They rise with the sun.

“How much further?” Kurogane asks looking out over the water before turning to where Fai is kneeled at the center. 

“Why do you think I know?” 

He crosses his arms. “Because you can talk to the damn thing.”

“You can to!” Fai looks up at him from beneath his lashes. Kurogane already knows the next thing out of Fai’s mouth is going to be dumb - “If you just  _ believe~ _ ” Fai bows dramatically towards the crater at the center. “Oh Metal Masters on your plains above. Show us the way!”

And he was right - Kurogane rolls his eyes, effectively hiding his amusement. He watches Fai right himself and make gestures with his hands that the Metalray  _ somehow  _ understands. If Kurogane hadn’t seen it work yesterday, he’d have to think Fai was crazy. It’s strange to him how Fai is very obviously staring at something that he can’t see. 

It’s different in Nihon. His mother is the Priestess of the Masters, she  _ prays  _ for answers but,  whatever it is Fai does is not prayer. It’s as if he already has the answers from the Masters themselves. He can’t help but to wonder if the Masters have chosen to give Fai a divine power, does that make Celes’ way of life the  _ right  _ way?

“Do you see something?” Fai glances at him, prompting Kurogane to elaborate. “When you talk to it.”

“Yes.”

“So you can see the Masters?” 

“Not-” Fai sighs. His hand pulls down and off to the side. The Metalray groans as it begins to move forward. “Not exactly.”

“Then what do you see?”

“I wouldn’t know how to explain it.”

Kurogane frowns and crosses his arms as he looks away. “Sounds like you just don’t want to explain it.” 

Fai’s mouth pulls up in the corner. “Some things are better left unknown. Especially to grumpy beast tamers.”

“ Tch .” It’s astounding, really, how hot and cold Fai can be. One second it’s as if there’s no filter between his mind and his mouth and the next he’s.... Well, he’s like he was at the village. Restrained. Reserved. A non-person. Decidedly, even though it’s more annoying, Kurogane prefers this version of Fai. 

“So you don’t know how much further we have to go?”

Fai’s arms stretch above his head until his back pops. “If the map is correct, we should be there by midday day after next.”

Kurogane eyes go wide as he takes in this information. Just how fast are they going? It takes the Hitsuzen fleet nearly half a lunar cycle to travel by boat.

Fai must sense his thoughts. “We’re moving fast.” A pause. “What are we going to do with Ray when we get there?”

“Ray?” Kurogane raises an eyebrow and Fai glances purposefully to the Metalray. “Don’t tell me you fucking named it.”

“Okay. I won’t tell you then.”

“It’s a machine!”

Fai rubs his hand over the lights in a soothing manner. “Don’t you listen to him.”

“It can’t listen. It’s not alive!”

Fai puts is cheek to the metal, ignoring him. “ C’mon , isn’t he kind of cute?”

He sighs and takes a seat. There’s no use trying to reason with an  _ idiot _ , it’s probably better to just let him do as he pleases. But, still, “Were not keeping it. I’m going to release it a few miles before the shore and then we’ll canoe the rest of the way.”

“No! Not after all we’ve been through!”

“The last two days?”

Fai sits up, pushing his hair back  in a casual manner . Casual or not, it’s...  _ fuck.  _ “Come on. You’re not even a little sentimental?”

“No. Why would I be?”

With a frown Fai continues. “Are you really so callous to how  _ amazing  _ our whole situation is?” He continues without being prompted. “We are using a  _ Metalray, _ to travel across the  _ ocean _ to a place we’ve never seen before.  _ You  _ tamed him. You tamed  _ this  _ beast. He allowed itself to be tamed by  _ you.  _ He’s the only reason we are able to go to Hitsuzen and we should respect the gift we’ve been given. Don’t you think?”

Kurogane runs his tongue over the front of his teeth. He’s never thought of it that way before. “I guess,” is all he’ll admit to though. 

Fai looks hopeful that Kurogane will change his mind. The infuriating part is he’s thinking about it but, for right now, “We’re still not keeping him.”

 

* * *

 

With another day and a half ahead of them there’s not much else to do but talk. The problem is that Fai isn’t sure what to talk about. There’s a difference between conversing and banter and at the moment all they can manage is banter. Honestly, they can only manage that because the majority of their back and forth is Fai teasing Kurogane. 

They stop at sun down. Both of them sit at the front of the Metalray with their feet in the water. It occurs to Fai that, perhaps, the reason they can’t move past banter is that they haven’t  _ tried  _ to have any sort of meaningful conversation that wasn’t directly related to their task or the Metalray. He supposes that the conversation they had that first night might count in some way but, even that had devolved to argument.

He drags his legs back and forth through the water at a slow pace. “The sunset is nice.”

“ Mmm .”

Well, that’s not much to build on. “Kind of looks like the Masters are cracking an egg over the water.” From the corner of his eye he sees Kurogane turn his face towards him and let out an amused huff. 

He tries a different approach. “Are you nervous?”

“About arriving in Hitsuzen?”

“Yeah.” Fai leans back on his hands and turns his face to look at Kurogane.

His face is unmoved like he’s deep in thought. “I haven’t really thought about it.”

Sensing Kurogane won’t elaborate on his own he asks, “What do you mean you haven’t thought about it?”

For a split second, Kurogane hangs his head then looks back up to stare out over the water. “I’d be nervous if failure was an option.” He pauses. “I can’t fail. There are too many people counting on this.”

Selfish as it may be, Fai hasn’t spent much time thinking about the village. That isn’t to say he’s forgotten them. No, he feels the absence of his people but, it’s only been two days and the situation in Celes hasn’t reached a point of crisis. It’s, perhaps, naïve to think this way but, there’s less of a sense of urgency. He hasn’t seen first hand the devastation that has befallen Suwa and is soon to befall his own village. 

However, it’s just occurred to Fai that Kurogane is here for one purpose: to save his people. He’s not here due to a longing for freedom and escape. As this realization washes over him, Fai turns his face away from Kurogane in shame. 

It’s disconcerting to realize Kurogane is a fully realized, multifaceted person. He  _ supposes  _ this should be obvious but, so often it’s easy to forget that people are not just what can be seen. There are roots. There are thoughts, ideas, hopes, dreams, desires - this list goes on.

“What’s it like in your village?” 

He can feel Kurogane’s eyes on him, like he’s sizing him up. “Why do you want to know?”

“I showed you mine. Time to show me yours?” There’s a beat of silence  and Fai hesitates before glancing to Kurogane from the corner of his eye.

Kurogane snorts. “Child.” He rubs the back of his neck the hair’s there tangling as he does. “I guess it’s not much different. I thought - I thought there would be more differences.”

“Like what?”

He shrugs. “Not sure. I grew up hearing about how savage the rituals of your tribe are but, on the surface our tribes aren’t too different.” Kurogane pauses. “I pictured your people as hostages but, they really believe in their way of life. I don’t understand it but...” He trails off.

“I-” Fai’s voice catches in his throat. He’s never said it out loud because how could he say  _ this _ as the High Oracle of Celes? “I don’t -” The words won’t form in this mouth.  _ I don’t believe in it. _

Kurogane’s brows pinch together. “Don’t start something you can’t finish.” 

His voice is rough but, it makes Fai smile. Kurogane is  _ comforting  _ in his own way, or maybe that’s just how he makes Fai feel. It’s absurd how quickly his opinion of Kurogane is changing. Just a few days ago he’d pegged him as cold and self serving. Now, he can see the how his rough edges are only a front to hide feelings he deems as a vulnerability.

Fai can’t think of others without becoming introspective.  _ Cold. Self serving.  _ Both of those ideas describe him better than they do Kurogane. That may be how Kurogane comes off but that’s how Fai  _ is. _

“What about you?”

Kurogane calls him back from his thoughts. He tilts his head not quite understanding what Kurogane has asked. 

“I mean about Hitsuzen. Are you nervous?”

He smiles. “You’re not going to like my answer.”

Kurogane rolls his eyes. “Wouldn’t be the first time.”

Fai laughs. “Was that a joke?”

“No.”

He laughs again letting his joy trail off as the sun finally dips below the horizon. “I haven’t really thought about it.”

From the corner of his eye he sees Kurogane’s mouth lift into the tiniest smile.

 

* * *

 

With the moon hanging heavily over the ocean’s surface, they spend the night talking.

Despite Kurogane’s first impression of him Fai isn’t _completely_ unbearable. Annoying? - Sure. But, the more time they are stuck together on a huge metal circle named _Ray -_ _Masters help me -_ the more he realizes that Fai isn’t even _that_ annoying. He’s something else entirely. Something Kurogane can’t quite describe.

Words like  _ childish  _ and  _ enigmatic  _ come to mind. Fai talks with unfiltered autonomy as if he never has before. This idea serves to ignite Kurogane’s latent curiosity. If he was being truthful, Kurogane would admit that he doesn’t take much interest in others. Not that he’s uncaring but, rather he prefers to focus on himself. So, for him to step outside his closed ring of concerns to think critically about Fai is.... out of character, to say the least. 

Next to him Fai  _ giggles  _ at something he’s said to make himself laugh and it drags Kurogane out of his mindscape and into reality. “Are you even listening to me?” Fai tries to harden his voice but, it falls about half way through. 

Kurogane drags his fingers through the hair at the base of his neck. Normally it would be braided and tied off with a string at the end but, the braid had fallen out while he was sleeping and the string had probably been thrown off the Metalray and into the ocean. “Yes.”

“What did I say.”

“Something stupid.”

Fai wipes his eyes dramatically. “Kuro-rude -”

“That’s not my name,” he mumbles though, he’s caring less and less that Fai refuses to call him by his given name. 

“- is so  _ mean. _ ”

There’s no thought to what he says next but, as soon as the words leave his mouth he’s embarrassed. “You like that about me.” He doesn’t look at Fai, mostly because he’s mortified.  _ You like that about me? - Really? _

There’s a seemingly unending beat of silence before Fai speaks. “I guess, maybe, I do.”

His eyes snap to meet Fai’s gaze.  _ He doesn’t mean.... _

Fai looks away only to glance back and look away again, his mouth dropping open to speak and closing as he realizes he doesn’t know what to say. “Maybe we should sleep?”

Kurogane knows they should sleep but,  _ fuck  _ he doesn’t want to. They’re alone, under the sky, and maybe it’s because there is nobody else around and the only thing for him to do all day, besides stare at the ocean, is to stare at Fai and Fai is  _ considerably  _ more interesting to look at. Still, it’s alarming that Fai is rapidly becoming way more attractive to him than anyone else has ever been. 

It’s also  _ unbelievably irritating _ . 

The worst part is trying to understand  _ why  _ Fai is so, ugh _ , alluring. _ He decides it must be the mystery. There’s the High Oracle of Celes who Kurogane can only describe as hollow and sad. Then there’s Fai from that first night, unsure and reserved _.  _ And then Fai from the beach, filled with a quiet defiance. Moreover, there’s this Fai, the one sitting on the Metalray who works himself into laughing fits and is so full of  _ light _ \- so full of something  _ warm  _ \- that who can blame Kurogane for being so inexplicably drawn to him?

He likes this part of Fai best but, he knows there’s more. Fai’s layered like the feathers of a bird. Some feathers are for show, something to puff up and display to those who want to look. And then there are the ones functioning in the background, less pretty, larger, created by necessity. Those are the feathers that really make him beautiful.

Instead on answering Fai, Kurogane ignores the question. He’s not going to tell Fai he doesn’t want to sleep because he’d rather stay up late talking - he’s not a teenager sneaking out of his tent anymore and that’s such an adolescent feeling to have. “You’re different.”

Fai tilts his head to the side. “What do you mean?”

“Before, on the island, you weren’t like this. How are you a different person than the person I met on the island?”

There’s something sad about the way Fai casts his eyes down to where his hand is laid out over one of the lights. When he looks up his eyes glint with mischief,  “ Aww , it almost sounds like you care about me.”

“ Tch . Just answer the question, idiot.” He gets straight to the point.

Fai’s mouth wobbles as he tries to form a response. “If I told you I didn’t know how to answer you...” he trails off.

“I wouldn’t believe you.”

With a sigh Fai ruffles his own hair, pushing it back from his face. “What was your childhood like Kuro-curious?” 

The question catches him off guard. “Normal?”

“Normal how?”

He doesn’t see how this relates to what he’s asked Fai but, this is what Fai does. He talks in circles which leaves Kurogane no other option but to trust that Fai will come back to his question. Either that or he’ll just ask his question again. Still, he’s not sure how to answer. How do you explain what normal is? 

Seeming to sense his hesitation with the question Fai continues. “Did you have friends who you ran around the village with?”

“Yeah.”

“Did you get scolded by adults?”

He scoffs, “Plenty.”

“Did you live with your mother and father?” Something in Fai’s voice changes, it wavers. For a second he thinks Fai is becoming emotional but, the way his eyes become hard makes it obvious Fai isn’t sad. He’s angry. Fai barrels on, not waiting for Kurogane to respond any longer. “Did you have the chance to make mistakes? Were you  _ told  _ who you were going to be?”

He answers the last question. “No, I wasn’t.” The way Fai lets his answer hang between them compels him to ask, “What about you?”

Fai just shakes his head. “Do you know how long I’ve been an Oracle of my village?” He doesn’t wait for Kurogane’s answer. “Fifteen years.”

Kurogane’s eyebrows pull together, he’d been under the impression they were close in age. “ How old are you? ”

“Only twenty, as of a few lunar cycles ago.”

_ Me too,  _ he muses to himself before it dawns on him. “You’ve been the High Oracle of your village since you were  _ five?” _

Fai nods.

The reality of Fai’s life begins to fall into place. “Have they -” he glances away, remembering how the people of Celes practically worship Fai. “Have they always treated you the way they do?”

He’s only met with another nod, slower this time. Sadder.

Kurogane finds himself suddenly enraged at the thought of a mere child being - being treated like a  _ prophet.  _ “That’s disgusting.” He spits the words. “How could they do that to a  _ kid? _ ”

Fai’s eyes go wide as if he hadn’t expected Kurogane to understand how his life was fundamentally influenced by something that, as a child, he had no control over. “I was never a child to them. I have the Eye of the Gods. I’m born of Metal. It makes sense to them.”

“Bullshit. What does any of that fucking mean? The Eye of the Gods? Born of Metal? Why are those things important?”

“What does it mean to be born of...?” Fai trails off as his face draws together in obvious confusion. “Do you not know how the war ended?”

This stops Kurogane altogether.  _ Why is he talking about the war?  _ But, of course he knows how it was ended, who wouldn’t? “There was a duel outside the Gate of the Masters. My father killed the Warchief of Celes and won our freedom.”

The silence that stretches between them is tense with  hesitation which serves to make Kurogane suddenly uncomfortable as if he’s about to be told something he doesn’t want to hear. The quiet becomes unbearable. “What?” His voice carries irritation.

“No...” Fai says slowly, like he’s afraid they are broaching unfriendly territory. “The -” He pauses, biting his lip before speaking again. “Have you been to the Gate of the Masters?”

Again with the circular conversation! “It’s sacred, of course I’ve never gone. What the fuck are you getting at?”

“It’s sacred and forbidden in our village as well but, I’m allowed to go because of my position. Because of my origin.”

The way Fai speaks is cryptic, like he wants Kurogane to piece together what he’s trying to say. His annoyance makes its way to his face, setting his mouth in a hard line. With his mood palpable, he doesn’t have to ask what the hell Fai means because he continues on his own. 

“I was not born of flesh and blood. I have no mother. No father. The day of the duel-,” he licks his lips and casts his eyes down, communicating that what he’s about to say is going to sound unbelievable and he knows it. He looks back up and meets Kurogane’s eyes with determination. “When your father and our Warchief met outside the Gate of the Masters to duel the Gate opened and gave a sign to stop the war. That sign was a baby,” he lets this sit a moment before continuing, “and that baby was -”

“No.” Kurogane cuts Fai off before another word of  _ insanity _ can be uttered. “My  _ father  _ killed your Warchief.”

At this Fai hardens. “No. He couldn't have you  _ met  _ our Warchief from the great war.”

“ Tch .” He scoffs. “I was not introduced to a Warchief.”

“That’s because Siben joined the counsel after the war.”

Kurogane stands and immediately starts pacing. This doesn’t make sense, who would lie to the entire village about the outcome of a war!  _ Why  _ would they lie? These questions run through his mind in a storm of upset but, quietly in the background is another thought making its way to the foreground. There were only four people who witnessed the duel according to their history. The two  Warchiefs and their religious leader. If they were the only ones there, then they are the only ones who could have lied.  _ My mother and father....  _ He refuses to acknowledge the rest of that thought but, it breaks through his mental barrier and screams.

Distressed by his realization he starts cracking his knuckles. Then, a smaller voice:  _ He’s lying. _ Kurogane stops pacing. “It can’t be true. There is no -” He pauses, anger filling his chest, “My parents wouldn’t  _ lie _ about that!” 

Fai stands, he has the same hollow look on his face that he wore in the village.  _ The one I hate the most.  _ “Siben’s alive. You can’t deny that.”

“Then Siben wasn’t the Warchief. You’re wrong.”

Fai turns his arms so his palms face up and makes a gesture of borderline remorse. His voice is sorry when he speaks. “It would be harder for a whole village to lie than two people.”

Kurogane eyes narrow, “Why do you keep saying this  _ bullshit?” _

The hollow face Fai wears cracks and leaves disbelieving sadness. “Because it’s the truth,” his voice cracks. “Just moments ago you-,” Fai raises his arms so his hands are  level with the crown of his head. His fingers go rigid, shaking, before both his arms drop without warning. “You saw how - how -” He puts his hands to his face and groans with a manic energy. “You asked  _ me.  _ You wanted me to tell you about why I’m this way and-” Fai lets on a small scream and turns his back to Kurogane.

Seeing he’s upset Fai fuels his own anger, while the irritation caused here should be directed at himself it gets mixed up with what he’s already feeling. “You don’t get to be angry!”

“Yes. I do. I didn’t spend my whole life the way I did for no reason and that’s what you're suggesting!”

At this Kurogane straightens up. He feels suddenly conscience-stricken and yet, he presses forward. “Do you have proof?” His voice is more even, the edge haven been shaved off by a lingering feeling of guilt. 

“Just the Eye,” Fai mumbles. 

_ The eye?  _ “You were born with it?”

Fai shrugs. “That’s what I was told but, there’s not a time I don’t remember having it.”

All this time Kurogane had assumed the Eye of God was an ability, but Fai’s makes it sound like an object. “Can I see it?” The question feels out of place. If it is something tangible that doesn’t mean it’s any more truthful as evidence. It could just be something that was found on the island, separate from the Masters and Fai’s birth.

After a moment Fai nods. He takes a step towards him and Fai takes one back. “You don’t trust me.” Kurogane feels disheartened at the realization. 

“ You were angry just a second ago, how am I supposed to know how you’re going to react now?” His gaze is stern leaving no room for argument. “Just stay there.” He turns his head to the side and pushes back his hair revealing a metal piece that until this moment has been hidden or otherwise unseen by Kurogane. 

His eyes widen as his whole body seizes up. The weight of the pendant that hangs below his shirt comes into focus. He’s never seen another one, his mother had told him that the triangular metal piece had been a gift from the Masters and to always keep it with him. And, there’s Fai with the same pendant fixed to his ear. 

Without thinking he steps forward, catching Fai off guard. He seems to shrink under Kurogane’s size. He grabs Fai’s ear and looks closely at the metal piece hanging off it.

He yanks Kurogane’s wrist and pulls his hand away. Fai’s hand goes immediately to his ear. “I told you not to come closer.”

They stare at each other. The mood is unreadable, there’s too much hanging in the air. “I’m going to sleep.” Kurogane turns and walks to the other side of the Metalray to lay down. A moment later he hears Fai do the same. 

Hoping Fai isn’t watching he pulls the triangular pendant from his shirt and stares at it. It’s undeniably the same as the Eye Fai wears on his ear but...

_ What does this mean? _

 

* * *

 

By daybreak, Fai still doesn’t know how to feel about the previous night. 

They’ve said good morning to each other, shared a canteen of water, and that’s about it. Aside from the occasional stare they keep catching each other in, neither of them have spoken. Kurogane doesn’t seem angry so much as he seems distressed.  Everytime Fai looks at him, it appears as though he’s deep in thought. 

He won’t apologize, Fai’s decided. He hadn’t said anything that was untrue and while he can understand why their conversation might have upset Kurogane but, he can’t be responsible for Kurogane’s reaction. 

After a day of critical thought - What else was he to do as the day dragged on in silence?-, he realizes he’s more upset at himself than he is at Kurogane. He’d been careless and let his guard down, revealing thoughts and feelings he’s kept to himself for so long. Secrets that could hurt people if they were to know. If they were to hear his religious doubts or the feelings of injustice and  anger he’s held over the years it would bring ruin to his village. 

Why him? 

_ Why me?  _

This isn’t the first time he’s asked himself that question. He’s spent countless hours over the years wondering why he had to be born with a destiny and why that destiny had served to make him so unhappy atop a pedestal he hadn’t asked for. 

Fai longs for personhood, a sense of identity that he chooses and he’d thought.... hoped, really, that he could do that here. That Kurogane was far enough removed from him that he wouldn’t ask too many questions and, if he did ask, that Kurogane might accept his response. 

_ Foolish, _ he tells himself. Not just for that though. No, foolish for entertaining the very  _ idea  _ that Kurogane had maybe, possibly been caught up in the same feeling of coquetry that he had.

He pulls his knees into his chest and rests his chin there. The ocean laps at the edges of the Metalray, the sound is soothing. He focuses on it until his mind has gone blank.

 

* * *

 

“Hey,” there’s a touch at his shoulder. “You’re going to fall into the ocean.”

Fai blinks himself awake. To his left Kurogane is crouched at his side, withdrawing his hand from Fai’s shoulder. Still half asleep, he lets out a slow hum as a soft smile comes over his face. It’s with increasing awareness that he remembers things between them are...  _ awkward _ . Though, he doesn’t let this realization show because it dawns on him that  _ Kurogane broke first _ . In an unspoken competition on wills Fai had won.

“Kuro-pu,” He draws out the name. Eyes unblinking he says, “I would have thought you’d rather me fall into the ocean than speak to me.”

At this Kurogane stands, a scowl coming over his face. “Next time I will.” 

Fai runs his tongue over his teeth, contemplating how far he wants to go. It’s shameless how he flops on to his back, the trajectory of his fall landing him parallel with the edge of the Metalray, and sighs as though he’s lying in the sand on the beach and not the cold, hard metal surface of a gigantic beast. “Well, okay then. Goodnight.” He puts his forearm behind his head and settles in. Waiting. Baiting. Hoping.

It’s with vehement resolve that Fai stays silent and it pays off. “Get the fuck away from there. You’re going to roll off the edge like an idiot.” Kurogane’s voice comes from behind him.

Giddy with satisfaction, his voice takes on a lilt of cockiness. “Thought you didn’t care.”

There’s no immediate response, but he can hear Kurogane’s clothes rustle as he shifts uncomfortably. “Shut up,” his reply is delivered with no particular hardness. It’s a place filler for something he’s not saying.

Fai rolls his eyes, not that Kurogane can see it. At this point, power in hand, all he has to do is keep pushing. Kurogane will either bite back or... Fai isn’t sure how he wants Kurogane to react but, he refuses to let the matter lie any longer. “I already did that.  _ You’re  _ the one who talked to  _ me _ ,” his voice starts clear and he finishes as a whisper so that Kurogane will only hear them if he’s paying attention.

“ Tch .” Fai can clearly see Kurogane’s face in his mind’s eye. Square jaw, set in a hard line. Eyes firm as they gaze at the sky. The scar on his face serving to highlight how his eyes shine with admission as opposed to anger.  His voice is measured, almost a whisper when he speaks, “Regretting it already.”

“ Hmm .” Sensing that he’s gone as far as he can with the upper hand he’s been given he sets to work doing exactly what he’s done all day: ignoring Kurogane in  all ways ... except staring. He can’t seem to stop doing that.

There’s a sigh from the center of the Metalray. “Can’t you just-” a pause. Fai doesn’t turn around. Kurogane must sense that Fai is done extending his olive branch. The decision to pacify the air between them is now up to Kurogane. “I was -,” another pause, this one punctuated by a sharp click of his tongue. “That was a lot to hear, okay?”

Fai doesn’t say anything for a moment, waiting to see if Kurogane continues. He doesn’t but, Fai feels oddly endeared by Kurogane’s attempt at explaining himself. He decides that the effort put forth, in itself, is worthy of a little of compassion. “Is that an apology?”

“It’s the closest you’re going to get. Take it or leave it.”

He’s pouting again, and Fai is finding it harder and harder to be anything less than charmed when Kurogane pouts. He sits up and turns to look at Kurogane, a hand  musing the roots of his hair. He feels emboldened by a sense of power that comes from Kurogane seeking his companionship. “Has the company been good?”

Kurogane shrugs and looks off to the side. “It’s been okay.”

His resolve softens at that. He stands and goes to sit beside him. “I could have...  _ said _ it differently.”

“No. You really couldn’t have.” Kurogane’s arms relax from where they were crossed over his chest. By extension his shoulders drop, taking away the edge to his body language. “I’m going to ask you something and I want you to be honest.”

Most people would phrase that statement differently:  _ Can I ask you a question?  _ Not Kurogane, he doesn’t ask permission, seeming to prefer to risk upsetting somebody than not be direct. He’s brave in a way Fai isn’t. Kurogane had been half right the night before. It’s not that he likes that Kurogane is mean, he likes that Kurogane is fearless when it comes to speaking his mind even if speaking his mind means upsetting others. “If I can be, I will.”

Kurogane doesn’t seem to  _ like  _ that answer but, he accepts it. He looks down to his lap and closes his eyes before looking out over the calm water. “Why do you think my parents lied?”

His jaw drops open as his eyes widen. Fai wasn’t sure what to expect from Kurogane but, this certainly isn’t it. “I - I don’t know.”

Kurogane nods to himself. “I don’t either.”

The sad, confused tone of Kurogane’s voice makes Fai  _ want _ to have an answer. “Maybe-” he starts only to realize he has no explanation to offer. “They must have had their reasons.”

Roughly running a hand over his face Kurogane speaks, “For lying to the village? Sure. But, lying to me?” He bites his lips. Quietly, “I’m supposed to be the next Warchief.”

Fai realizes that it’s never  _ occurred _ to Kurogane that his parents were capable of lying. In a way, it’s a blessing he’s made it to twenty years old without knowing the special type of betrayal that comes with being lied to by somebody you love. “Do you trust your parents?”

Kurogane looks to him and without hesitation, “Yes.”

“Then trust they did it for the best.” He doesn’t move to look away and neither does Kurogane. He can’t help but feel as though Kurogane is searching for something in his answer. Searching for the sense of security that can be found in sincerity.

They say nothing and after a while the intensity of Kurogane’s stare makes him look away, he pushes a stray piece of hair behind his ear. “Does this mean you believe me?”

Kurogane leans back, allowing his left leg to extend in front of himself while keeping the other bent at the knee. “I don’t want to but, there are too many parts of your story I can’t make fit.”

“Like?”

“Like the fact you don’t have a reason to lie about Siben being Warchief. You could have a reason to lie about not having parents but, I can’t think of a good one. Your people worship you like you were a god - it makes sense that they have a reason to do that. Even if being Born of Metal sounds like a  kid’s story.” He looks to Fai, a gleam of mischief in his eye.

Fai bites his lip, trying not to smile. When he fails the both let out a breath of laughter.

Kurogane coughs, looking away before itching the back of his head where the longer piece of his hair fall down his neck.

“Hair bothering you?” Fai guesses.

“Lost the clasp. Hate when it’s not braided. Sticks to my neck.”

Fai rolls his eyes as if to say  _ look at my hair and then complain _ .

“Oh, shut up.”

He takes pride in the fact Kurogane understood him without words. He laughs, “I could braid it for you.” Kurogane’s body tenses for an imperceptible moment, still Fai sees it and he immediately back pedals. “I mean, I braid my own hair sometimes. I know how. I could use a loose thread to tie it off.”

Kurogane looks away. “It’s fine. I’ll live.”

Fai deflates a little. Though the offer had been  spur of the moment once he had said it his heart had sped up in his chest. The thought of  _ touching  _ Kurogane had overwhelmed his mind with possibility. “Yeah, okay.” He pulls away a little, adjusting so they aren’t as close together. 

_ What do you want? _ He asks himself. Trying to understand the intense, building attraction between them is impossible. He can’t help but  _ feel  _ Kurogane echos his thoughts. They’ve caught  _ each other _ staring and what reason does he have to stare at Fai if not...

It’s a benign hope to want something,  _ anything _ , to happen between them. He’s not asking for forever. Just a moment of excitement. A moment just for himself. 

 

* * *

 

Dawn brings with it the striking reality that today they will arrive at Hitsuzen. Despite what he told Fai, he is nervous. Not nervous that he’ll  _ fail _ , failure isn’t an option but, the realization that he’s about to be one of the first two people to leave the island and touch foreign land leaves a pit of apprehension in his stomach. The only thing that eases this feeling  is knowing he isn’t alone.

Things between them are relaxed they’ve spent the last hour sitting and talking about differences in their histories that pre-date the war and childhood fables. For the most part it’s the same, it’s in the details that the stories have changed.

“So that’s why the men of your village have the scar,” Fai muses as Kurogane relays how his father had received his in the war.

“For the most part.”

“What’s the other?”

“Other?”

“The other part.” Fai smiles adding, “ _ Dumbass _ .”

Kurogane snorts. “You went from dumbass to smartass real quick.”

“Does that mean you’re not going to tell me?”

He shrugs and looks away. An action that feels boyish in its coquetry. “If you really  want to know, I guess I’ll tell you.” 

Fai rolls his eyes at Kurogane’s antics.

“It started as a symbol of loyalty to the cause. I don’t know if it’s written in your history but, my parents are the ones who spoke out against the breeding rituals of your village. They wanted to be together.”

Fai tilts his head, “I didn’t know that. We’re only told that a faction of the village went against the  _ Masters _ but, there is never any detail.”

“Well, that’s what happened. My parents fell in love and when they told the Oracles they wanted to be together without the blessing of the Masters they were made  example of.” Remembering the hollow face of his mother as she recounted their punishment, he lets his voice drop as he finishes.

He must look as sick as he feels because Fai says, “You don’t have to tell me but, if you  _ want  _ to tell me, I’ll listen.”

Kurogane takes a breath. There’s something terrifying about how easy it is to talk to Fai. They’ve only just met a few days ago and yet, it feels like they’ve known each other a lifetime. Opposite their oral histories, they don’t know each other in the details but, they know each other through this  _ intrinsic understanding _ between them. It doesn’t make sense and he’s tired of trying to rationalize it. 

He turns back to Fai, “I only know what my parents told me. After being told they couldn’t be together, the Oracles started watching them to make sure they weren’t conspiring to become blasphemers. They got caught in the jungle, I didn’t ask what they were doing in the jungle-”

“Because they're your parents.”

“Exactly. I didn’t ask for details.” He clears his throat to continue. “After getting caught they were punished. The Oracles cleansed them through blood. They bound them so my father couldn’t see my mother but so that she could see him. They whipped my father until his back split open.” He’s suddenly on edge. He hadn’t even been alive at the time of these events and yet, the image of the atrocities committed against the people he loves turns his stomach. Kurogane glances to Fai from the corner of his eye not having realized he’d broken eye contact. 

Fai’s eyes have gone wide and in them he sees horror. Part of him had been afraid Fai would agree with the punishment his parents received but, a larger part knew he wouldn’t.

He continues, “Neither of my parents can tell me exactly what happened to my mother but, I can guess. She can’t have children and there’s a large scar on her stomach. What I do know is that she screamed for mercy. My dad told me once that hearing them  _ do that _ to her was the worst moment of his life because he had been powerless to stop them.” Latent anger comes to his voice. “Nobody helped them! Everyone just watched! They  _ watched _ my parents get maimed. My  _ mother, _ ” Kurogane pauses, biting his lip. “They  _ mutilated _ her.”

“Kuro-”

He cuts Fai off, unable to stop as he feels the pain of his family history. “My father turned when she screamed and the whip landed across his face, leaving him with the scar. They both barely survived but once they had recovered people started approaching my father saying they wanted change too. Saying they wanted freedom. And they went to war.”

The story hangs between them like a fragile secret. “Kurogane.”

The use of his full name surprises him.

“There are not words to express how disgusted I am with my people. I’m sorry I never knew. If I had - Oh god, I showed them the  _ Maiden dormitory. _ ” His voice is horror struck.

“It’s not your fault, idiot. There’s nothing you could have done.”

“Maybe not then but now...” Fai looks away, shame planted in his features. “I’m too numb to change anything.”

Kurogane doesn’t know what to say to this because he doesn’t fully understand what Fai means. Fai’s body language tells him not to ask but, still he feels like he should say or do something. 

He reaches out, cradling the back of Fai’s head with his hand, forcing Fai to look at him. His thumb rests against Fai’s cheekbone. “You are not responsible for what those monsters did. You’re only responsible for what you do.”

The weight of his words softens Fai’s face, like he can’t believe he’s been absolved of his guilt. What he says next catches Kurogane off guard, “I never realized how deep the wounds of the war still are.” Fai puts his hand over Kurogane’s and his breath catches. “I wondered why you were so cold to me when we first met. I’m surprised you can look at me, let alone talk to me. You - you should hate me for what I represent.”

Fai’s eyes are filled with sorrow and guilt, something in them says he wants the blame. That he wants to suffer the wrath and hatred his ancestors created. He wants to say something to take the pain out of Fai’s face but, all he can manage is, “I don’t hate you.”

It’s with sudden urgency that he wants to kiss Fai. The intensity of it startles him so much that he lets his hand drop from Fai’s face before he does something he can’t take back. 

The mood between them shifts to something soft and exposed. “That was a lot.” He says.

Fai hums in agreement. “Can I ask one more question?”

“Yeah.”

“How did you get your scar?”

Kurogane doesn’t quite smile at the question but, it does lighten something in his chest. “The men of the war did it as a show of remorse for not helping my parents. It’s a pledge of loyalty. It was then and it is now. When boys of the village come of age, they hold a ceremony in the center of the village and use a knife to cut open our faces and put ash in the cut, leaving the scar once it’s healed.”

“When does that happen?”

“At twenty. Same age my father was when he led the revolt.”

“Your father sounds very well respected.”

“He is.”

“I can understand why. When I met him, I immediately trusted everything he said.”

Kurogane lets out on amused breath. “He has the  affect on people.”

Fai swallows, his face becoming nervous. “Can I touch it?” His voice is quiet, his eyes flicking between Kurogane and the surface of the Metalray.

“Yes,” the word sticks in his throat but, is uttered nevertheless.

It seems like there’s a long moment before Fai moves to kneel in front of him. As Fai extends his arm to touch him all Kurogane can think about is how he’s stared at Fai’s hands for days, wondering if they’re as soft and dexterous as they look. 

Fai’s fingers feel cool against his burning skin. They run the length of his scar feeling the dips where the abrasion is inlaid. His gaze on Kurogane doesn’t  waver, as if Kurogane is the only thought in his mind. His chest inflates at the idea, filling a hole inside that he didn’t know he had. Fai leans in closer, his thumb running back and forth over where the scar ends on his cheek. 

“Did it hurt?”

It takes a moment for Kurogane to process what he’s been asked. “Like a bitch.”

Fai cocks his head to the side, fingers still lingering at the bottom of his scar. “It’s deeper here. The end flicks to the left. I didn’t notice that before.”

His voice is thick and his stomach is starting to grow tight, “With how much you stare, it’s surprising you didn’t notice.”

Fai’s eyes meet his, unwavering, “You say that as if I’m the only one staring.”

The mood is there, but the cover of night isn’t. What is it about the darkness that makes people more brave? More daring? More honest? He knows Fai can sense the tension in the air too if the way he rolls his lip between his teeth is any indication. 

He can’t help but wonder if Fai is thinking the same thing:  _ I really want to kiss him. _ And this time, unlike just minutes ago, he would  except , behind Fai, in the distance, he can make out the shore of a land never before seen by his people. He stares past Fai and after a moment he turns to see what Kurogane is looking at. 

“ _ Masters _ ,” Fai whispers. 

Both of them sit awestruck at the front of the Metalray unable to do anything but stare in wonderment at the sight before them.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you read carefully, you can pinpoint the exact moment I realized I wasn't going to be able to finish editing.
> 
> Also, the smut scene in this is over 6k words and 90% of the reason I almost didn't finish.

The Hitsuzen palace is, by far, the largest structure Fai has ever been in. The vast majority of the palace is made of open air walkways laid with warm colored stones that border gorgeous gardens filled with flowers Fai’s never seen before. The town itself is densely packed with compacted dirt alleyways that a single person can hardly squeeze through and merchants in cloth covered tents beckoning for a person to step forward and make a purchase. Of course, there isn’t much time to look - they aren’t on a pleasure trip.

It hadn’t taken long to establish contact with the people of Hitsuzen, the guard had seen them approaching in their canoe miles out from shore. There had been a moment upon their arrival where Fai had worried they would be mistaken for invaders or any number of things that would not guarantee their safety. However, no sooner than he considered they might be mistaken as hostiles was it clear they had been expecting them. “The Empress has been waiting for your arrival.”

This realization had set Fai on  edge, if only because he could sense Kurogane wasn’t comfortable with the idea that  _ somebody _ had known they were coming.

They are given private rooms across the hall from each other. The guards leave him at his door saying that servants will be along shortly to help him prepare for their meeting with Empress Yuuko - a meeting they hadn’t even had a chance to request before being told about it. 

Fai swallows his nervousness with a laugh and turns to Kurogane with a hollow smile, “If you need me whistle and I’ll come running.”

Kurogane narrows his eyes. “I won’t be whistling,” he says before turning to enter his room.

Following suit Fai does the same. He is undeniably  _ floored _ by the room he finds himself in. Considering his position, he had been gifted with ornate gifts from the people of Hitsuzen during their twice-yearly visit ever since he was a child. Now, standing in a room considered so  _ quaint _ that one of the guards had felt the need to  _ apologize _ for their accommodations, Fai realizes that the gifts he’d received had not begun to encompass the wealth of the city.

The floors are polished so that when he looks down at them, he can see his own reflection. There are fur rugs laid across the center of the room inviting him to venture forward. A bed, easily three times the size of his sleeping mat at home, sits center against the  right hand wall. Piled high with pillows and wrapped in linens that are cool to the touch. 

Jewels and  metal hang from the ceiling and  _ ting _ _!  _ when he opens the door to a sprawling balcony, allowing the wind to blow freely through the room. The balcony overlooks the city which gives way to fields upon fields of crops and from there a vast, unending landscape.

The servants arrive they take him to the bathing chambers and scrub him clean of the lingering scent on salt water and metal from days spent on the ocean. Of all the things people of the island did for him,  _ bathing _ him was not one of them. Still, he takes it in stride knowing this is one of those  _ political niceties  _ the Tsubame had mentioned over the counsel table not long ago. 

Half way through bathing, he looks back to the girl scrubbing his hair a thought in mind. “Did Kuro-sweet let you wash him?”

She blushes and bites her lip. Fai smirks,  _ of course he didn’t. _

They dress him in clothing that makes himself uncomfortable. It’s the color, not the nakedness that makes him pause. At home he dresses in whites and blues - colors that exude purity and guidance. Now, he stands before a mirror wearing onyx, the color only broken by silver threads and jewels that look like glass. The wide, silver embroidered waistband of his pants sits just over his navel, snug but not tight. The pant drapes to his ankle where the hem pulls taught, making the fabric appear to be full of air that moves as he does. They pull a top over his head, the neck of which cinches around his throat, while the hem clings just above the waist of his pants. The fabric is stitched to the center of the collar and hugs his chest, leaving his back and shoulders exposed. As he runs his fingers over the top, he notices its sheer in some areas and solid in others, creating a subtle pattern colored by the paleness of his skin. 

Looking at himself he feels disconnected. In the mirror is a man pulsing with need and desire. A man whose own beauty does not escape him. Yet, as he looks at this man, skin scented like rain by lavish soap, hair brushed into submission, exuding elegance and sex without trying he knows that is not who he is. He’s the High Oracle of Celes, Child Of Metal, Ender of Bloodshed, Gift of the Master, Oracle of Prophecy. Coward. Enabler.

He wants to be the man in the mirror. Instead, he’s the man outside looking in. 

 

* * *

 

Pacing does little to calm the nerves and yet, Kurogane still does it. After being  _ bathed _ \- he grimaces at the memory of a handful of young women pulling him out of his clothes, something he never imagined happening in his life, and pushing him into a deep puddle of water they call a  _ tub _ . He drew the line at having his  _ situation _ touched, which is another thing involving women he’d never imagined. - Kurogane finds himself alone in his room, dressed in stupidly soft red pants that sit high on his waist and a red vest embroidered with enough gold that it had become the primary color. 

_ I can’t wear this _ , he’d hissed at the attendants when he realized this garment would leave him almost completely bare chested. They had apparently taken that as dissatisfaction with the quality of his outfit and fitted him with a gold ring as penance. More alarming than being bare chested though is that there is no coverage for the pendant he wears on his neck.

He has two choices, remove the pendant he’s worn since birth or leave it exposed for Fai to see and draw his own conclusions about.  _ Or _ , he turns to the mirror and fingers the leather string his pendant hangs on, he could just turn it around? He pinches the leather and moved it around his neck until the pendant is tucked below the back of the vest.

It’s not that Kurogane doesn't want to tell him it’s that he’s not ready to face what it could mean that they both have the pendant. Fai’s had his whole life to come to terms with the idea of not being born of flesh and blood and Kurogane - he doesn’t even want to think about that right now. Not when the end goal is just in sight.

There’s a knock at his door. He tugs at the center flaps of his vest, pulling is snug over his shoulders. “Come in,” he calls.

The door opens revealing a male attendant, “Dinner will begin shortly, I’ve been sent to escort you to the dining hall.”

He nods and begins to follow the attendant through the halls of the palace until they reach a grand garden. It’s thick with foliage, long leaves hand over the sides of the stone walkway, and large flowers dotting the greenery. At the center of the garden is the dining hall itself. What it lacks in walls is made up for by beautifully carved columns that support a domed ceiling. He can’t help but to look up as he steps into the structure. On the ceiling there is a swirling mural made up of so many colored stones that when it catches the light that it’s hard to distinguish what color it is.

“Kurogane, future Chieftain of Suwa.” A voice he’s never heard calls his name. It carries with it an air of amusement and self-assuredness. His eyes fall on a woman lounging, not sitting, at the head of the table. She seems hardly dressed for a formal dinner, let alone a casual one. The sleeve of her black and gold robe slips off her shoulder pulling low enough that there is not left to imagine in regard to her ample chest. She leans in over the table, loosely  lacing the tips of her fingers together so she can rest her chin there. “I’ve been expecting you.”

At her words he stops short, wary of anybody who claims to have known he would be here. “Who are you?” While the question is simple, his tone asks for more than a simple answer.

“Straight to the point. I suppose your companion is the diplomat while you are the muscle.” Her gaze washes over him. “I can see why.”

He clenches his jaw, the last few hours are a blur, he’d assumed Fai was enduring the same  _ political niceties _ he was but, looking around the empty dining hall he’s suddenly on edge.  _ Where is that idiot? _

“Don’t worry about your friend. He’s on his way.” 

_ How the fuck does she know what I’m thinking? _

She cocks her head, “It’s written all over your face. Don’t be so suspicious.”

Kurogane can feel himself frown. 

“You’re not like Sachihiro at all. Guess that’s  to be expected considering the blood relation, or lack thereof is what I  _ should _ say. Though, I do have to express, you look remarkably similar to him.”

It’s common knowledge among the people of his village that he was found abandoned at the end of the war but, who is  _ this _ woman and how does she know him?

“Should I answer your question, or should I wait for you to ask?” She leans back in her lavishly upholstered chair taking a long draw of the pipe she has set on the table. 

Trying to keep the irritation out of his voice, “You haven’t answered my first question.”

The corner of her mouth turns up in delight. “I am Yuuko, Empress of Hitsuzen. The City of Fate, some call it.” 

Kurogane isn’t interested in pleasantries. “How much do you know?”

“Enough,” She taps the end of her pipe, emptying the ash. “I saw you board the Metalray in a vision.”

His eyes go wide,  _ how could she-? _

“I’d like to know how you were able to speak to it. Though, the vision shows it might be more appropriate to ask your companion.” She looks over his shoulder, “I get the feeling our conversation is about to be cut short.”

Kurogane turns, approaching from a dusk lit path is Fai, an attendant leading him from the front. Words escape him as his eyes go wide and  _ arousal _ comes over him. The last few days have been wrought with flirtatious tension but, this? Fai clad in onyx, a color that only emphasizes his beauty. Silver embroidery drawing attention to his waist where sinewy muscle makes itself just visible beneath his flesh. His mind can hardly process the  _ mesh _ that clings to his chest, leaving a sliver of skin between the hem that tightly wraps around his middle and the waist of his pants. 

This isn’t flirtatious tension. This is sex. This is raw,  inexplicable desire. And now they have to sit through dinner and Kurogane isn’t sure he can even walk to the table without drawing attention to the fact he’s half hard.  _ Fuck, _ if Fai were to so much as  _ glance _ at Kurogane’s crotch he would never live it down. 

He turns back to Yuuko, face red.

“Perhaps you should,” she clears her throat, “ _ sit _ ?”

Not realizing he could be  _ any  _ more mortified, Kurogane walks to the opposite end of the table and takes a seat on Yuuko’s  left hand side. Taking a few deep breaths he closes his eyes.  _ Focus.  _

Across from him a chair moves and when he opens his eyes Fai is seated. “Do you feel sick Kuro- sama ?” His face is of genuine concern.

He grits his teeth. “Hardly.”

Yuuko leans in again, setting her chin on her hands and smiles. “It is not often that I am graced with the presence of two gorgeous men,” she says with an almost predatory gaze.

Kurogane’s reaction is embarrassment but, opposite him Fai looks completely composed, “It is us who should count our blessings Empress Yuuko.”

Slapping her hand on the table. “I knew you were the diplomat!  _ You _ know my name.” She glances to Kurogane from the corner of her eye. “Though, I suppose it would reason that any guest seeking shelter at my palace  _ would _ know my name and title.”

Sucking it up, Kurogane turns to face her. “Apologies for my ignorance. Your,” he searches for the word, “ _ beauty _ , caused a momentary mental lapse.” His words are delivered with the grace of a flopping fish.

At this Yuuko howls with laughter. “Come now Kurogane of Suwa! Your father and I are old friends from when I was young and still travelled with my father’s fleet. Had he not passed, I might still. Last I saw you, you were ten? You’re still just as -” she pauses, tilts her head in consideration. “ _ Rambunctious _ as you were then.”

He glowers at her word choice. 

“Of course that’s how I know Fai as well. High Oracle of Celes.”

Kurogane sends a glare Fai’s way, a glare he finds hard to keep when he’s looking at him. “You knew who we were meeting?”

Servants begin to enter the hall carrying pitchers of wine and plates of food. “I had my suspicions. I didn’t know her as a heiress as a child. I must of thought she was just another crew member. I never really thought about why she stopped coming but, I knew who she was when I saw her.” A young woman pours Fai a glass of wine as he speaks. “I guess there were some things deemed unnecessary for me to know.” 

Yuuko holds up her glass. “To an interesting evening!” She tips her head back and drains her cup of wine, not letting a single drop slip past her lips, and looks to both of them. She leans in over the table, a sharp grin coming over her face, “In  _ my _ palace guests are expected to keep up with the Empress.” Her tone suggests that she is willfully abusing her position for her own entertainment.

With a shrug, Fai raises his glass and follows Yuuko’s lead by tipping his head back and swallowing the whole glass of wine.  _ I thought he didn’t drink _ , Kurogane recalls. He opens his mouth to say something in regard to this but, stops when a trail of burgundy starts to run down the column of Fai’s throat. The contrast between his alabaster skin and the black of the clothing he’s been given is already...  _ breathtaking _ . But, to add the red, deep and sensuous in nature, running from the corner of Fai’s mouth, along his throat, stopping only at the collar that wraps around his neck is enough to light a fire in Kurogane that rips through him. Hot and blazing, he imagines himself lunging across the table and catching the beads of wine with his tongue, following the trail up to Fai’s mouth and -

Kurogane chugs his wine, if only to distract himself from the images of Fai beneath him, over him, just a mess of tangled limbs and carnal movements that are wreaking havoc in his  mindseye . An attendant comes to serve him more wine, “Leave the pitcher,” he says through clenched teeth.

Yuuko cheers raising her newly filled  glass so loosely that the liquid jumps at the edges of her cup. “It’s going to be an interesting night indeed!”

The next hour or so is spent making idle conversation, a generous portion of it being at Kurogane’s expense. He takes it in stride, chasing his irritation with wine until there’s a pleasant buzz at the back of his head. 

“How disappointing,” Yuuko muses. “Sachihiro likes to sing and recount stories from his youth when drunk but, you,” she points to Kurogane with a glint in her eye. “You just sit there looking,” she smacks her lips. “Magnificent.”

Fai raises his arms above his head and makes a noise that sounds vaguely like a whistle. He’s so cute without meaning to that Kurogane hasn’t been able to look at him all night. Now, with Fai’s hair mused from him drunkenly running his fingers through it between drinks and banter, almost as if he’s  _ trying  _ to steal Kurogane’s attention, it’s becoming difficult to focus on anything else. Including their purpose for being here. There are very few things he would not give to round the table, haul that stupid fucking Oracle  up  until they were standing face to face, and indulge in every fantasy he’s had since dinner started.

Kurogane throws back his glass and finishes it with a loud smack. “You’d have better luck catching a fish with a broken net.”

“Is it my  _ age! _ ” Yuuko throws her upper body on the table. “I’m still a spring chicken! Not even married!” She sits up, laughs to herself. “Not to say that I’m  _ pure _ .”

At this, Kurogane snorts. “That goes without saying.”

“Kuro-rude!” Fai slams a hand on the table. “Now, how did you  _ think  _ we were going to negotiate?”

It takes a moment before Fai’s meaning comes over him. He balks, thoroughly thrown off by the very  _ implication _ -

Fai and Yuuko bend over laughing. 

“His face!” Yuuko brings her fist to the table over and over. “Oh, Goddess!”

Across from him, Fai bites his lip and cocks his head. “Though, one can’t help but wonder why Kuro-shy wouldn’t want to engage with an  _ empress _ .”

Kurogane thinks back to the first day he’d met the Oracle and the drink they’d shared on an unlit pathway. Fai had said he didn’t drink much and Kurogane has resolved to keep it that way moving forward if only for the sake of his sanity.

“Well,” she pulls from her pipe and levels her gaze. “His interests appear to lie elsewhere but, still nearby, perhaps?”

He clucks his tongue. “That’s none of your business, witch.”

“Oh!” She sits up straight. “That’s the fire I expect from Sachihiro’s son! You know what that tells me?” She looks to Fai.

“It’s time to sing!” Fai guesses with the utmost confidence. 

She chuckles. “No, though we could do that later. It tells me it’s time to discuss the reason for your visit.”

It’s unsettling how quickly Yuuko goes from a drunken annoyance to all powerful empress. She sits with her back pressed firmly in her chair, hands laid out over the armrests, one leg crossed over the other. “As fun as this has been, I doubt your reason for crossing the ocean, on a Metalray no less, is to drink with me.”

“How the fuck do you know that?” His response is automatic.

“Kuro-puppy,” the nickname is by far the stupidest yet but, the tone draws his attention to Fai. His eyes have gone hard, the air of importance he carried with him during that first meeting is palpable. “If you were going to bite, you should have done that earlier.” 

Fai straightens his back. “Pleasure first, business later. I’ve always appreciated that about your representatives, just as well as I’ve always appreciated your transparency. Forgive me Empress but, you have to understand that you having knowledge of our journey is disconcerting.”

“Yes, I suppose it is. Though I can’t understand why it would be important to reveal my methods.”

Kurogane is at a loss for words. Moments ago he’d thought both of them to be foolishly drunk. Now, he can see just how wrong he was. He’s honed his body and senses for years to be the best warrior in Suwa but, this is the other side of the coin. Fai has been groomed his whole life for this. Seeing him wield this kind of power sparks a new kind of desire in him.

Fai’s lip quirks up, “Knowledge should be cultivated, not horded.”

“Agreed but, not if the other party has nothing to offer.”

He watches Fai closely, his face is contemplative as though he’s reached a dead end. Fai takes a breath,  _ resigning himself to what?  _ Kurogane was never much for politics but he does know that possessing information is at its core. “She asked how you communicated with the Metalray before you arrived.”

Fai’s face lifts but returns to its demanding glare almost immediately as Yuuko looks between the two of them. She chuckles. “Seems I’ve been found out. It’s nice to know you remember what I taught you, Fai.”

“The first person to ask a question gives away the upper hand.” Fai’s voice has softened.

“One day you’ll be a master but, you’ll never best me.”

“Except for this time.”

“Which we will never speak of.” They both laugh at a joke Kurogane has heard but, well, it’s just not very funny if you ask him.

“To the point.” Yuuko leans in over the table. “What can you offer and what do you want?”

Fai looks across the table to Kurogane and nods his head, giving the floor to him. “Our people are sick. It’s an illness we haven’t seen before. The adults recover but, -”

“The children die,” Yuuko finishes.

“Yes.”

“Symptoms?”

“Rash, fever, swollen neck, trouble with food and drink.”

“Our healers haven’t had any luck,” Fai interjects. “The illness has just reached Celes but, Nihon has been suffering much longer.”

Yuuko reclines in her chair, relaxed. “We call it the Red Rage. Terrible illness but, not untreatable.”

“So you have a cure?” Kurogane leans forward, his heart racing at the thought of ending the suffering of his people. 

“Ah,” Yuuko holds her hand up. “Always remember, politics are a game. I’ve played a card, now you must play one. Nothing gained is  nothing owed.”

Fai turns to him, making eye contact. The blue of his eyes are deep enough to get lost in under any other circumstance but, at this moment they ask for trust. “In exchange for knowledge in regards to your cure I will tell you how we spoke to the Metalray.”

“Is that all you want?”

He sees Fai visibly swallow before looking to Kurogane. Knowing what Fai wants he nods, he can give at least this much having let Fai shoulder the burden of negotiation. “We also wish to know how you knew of our journey.”

“And what will you give in exchange for that?”

Without looking at Fai, Kurogane knows what needs to be offered. “I’ll show you how we tame the metal beasts.”

Yuuko looks out over the table, not at them but, to the gardens beyond. She stares a long moment, considering her options, before a grin breaks out over her face. “To learn about both the visions and the cure it’s a few hour’s journey to the Mother Mountain.”

“Mother Mountain?” Fai tilts his head.

“Yes, the mountain from which my people emerged. Not unlike your own.” She taps out the ashes of her pipe and sets it on the arm of her chair. “Our priests and healers live inside the mountain to be close to the Goddess. They have the cure and the Room of Visions.”

“A room?”

“All in due time High Oracle. I’ll accompany you, of course. We’ll set out tomorrow morning and be back by dusk.” With that she drums her hands on the table. “I suppose it’s time to bring an  end to our soiree,” She calls an attendant over. “Please escort our guest back to their rooms.”

Before he can think better of it he opens his mouth, “We can get back on our own.”

 

* * *

 

Fai looks across the table to Kurogane, his mouth slightly agape if only because of how unnecessary his statement appears. Regardless, a teasing smile falls on Yuuko’s face and Kurogane scowls back at her, not breaking eye contact. “Yes, of course. I should have known better.”

The noise Kurogane’s chair makes as he pushes it back startles him. “C’mon, idiot.”

Confused and offended  _ because  _ he’s confused, Fai stands and bids good night to Yuuko who has already refilled her glass of wine. She waves him off, the look on her face devious and pleased. 

“What was that about?” Fai asks when he catches up to Kurogane. He seems tense and flexes his fingers as he walks, a tick Fai hasn’t noticed until now. When Kurogane doesn’t answer, Fai groans loud and dramatic until he finally gets a reaction.

“Let me think.”

“About what?”

“Stuff.”

“Stuff? What about  _ stuff _ ?”

Kurogane turns his face to Fai, his jaw tense. “I’ll let you know when I’m done thinking!”

Fai rolls his eyes, at least the silence allows him to do his own thinking. He remembers, now, being a child and sitting on Yuuko’s lap during one of her visits to Celes. He’d been too young to have any  _ real _ political power then but, Yuuko had taught him lesson after  lesson in regard to politics and how to carry himself during meetings. So, it goes without saying, that going back and forth with her as equals feels like he’s come full circle.

Moreover, they’d been successful. In two or three days they'll take their leave and in another three they’ll be back on the island with a cure for their people. Something that had been knotted in his stomach comes loose at that realization and with it a rush of adrenaline.

He wants to share in their success with Kurogane. Fuck it all, he  _ wants _ him. When Kurogane had turned to face him upon his arrival to dinner he’d knocked the wind out of Fai. The red paired with the gold embroidery against his body, tanned by days spent in the island sun, was enough to make his mouth water.

Bare chest. Strong arms. Hard stomach. Beautiful, gorgeous face with those full lips and icy stare and  _ Masters _ he’s never felt like this before. Hot by just looking at him and bothered just being close to him. Kurogane stops short when they arrive at their rooms. For a long moment he doesn’t look at Fai but when he does turn his face is tight. “We should probably sleep.”

Something in Fai wilts. He hadn’t given much thought to what would happen after they excused themselves for dinner but, he knows he didn’t want this. “Yeah,” he reaches out, putting a hand on his door handle and pauses. He bites his lip and looks over his shoulder at Kurogane, pleading for one of them to take action. When Kurogane doesn’t move Fai pushes his door open, “Well, goodnight Kuro-red.” 

He’s nearly shut the door behind himself when Kurogane slams a hand against the frame. “We should sleep but, maybe, we should discuss our plan of action for tomorrow first.”

Fai nods along with Kurogane’s words. “Yeah. I think that’s a good idea.” He steps back from the door to let Kurogane pass and presses it closed. He takes a moment before turning, his heart hammering in his chest as a his body teeters between cold nervousness and scorching need. 

He turns back to face the room but, Kurogane is there glowering down at him. It makes Fai chuckle nervously. “Kuro- sama , why so angry?”

Kurogane’s hand is in his hair so quickly that Fai gasps at the suddenness. But, it’s only for that moment he’s caught off-guard. The air between them ignites and while this is new to him there is something to be said about instinct and desire. He pushes up on his toes meeting Kurogane halfway for a kiss that’s more like a mashing of teeth and gums considering its force. Regardless of the quality he wants more.

Flinging his arms around Kurogane’s neck he’s left standing on his tiptoes to keep their mouths connected.  _ Closer, _ he thinks as he practically hangs from Kurogane’s nape. Even with the word unspoken Kurogane must know what he wants. His hand drops from Fai’s hair grabbing roughly at his hips, pulling them into his own, Fai whines.

Kurogane leans over him, relieving Fai of having to balance on his toes, bending him backwards until his back is arched. He drags his nails down Kurogane’s chest, ripping a growl from the man above him. One of Kurogane’s hands comes to his face, his pointer finger tilting Fai’s head until Kurogane seems satisfied with the angle. “Open your mouth for me.” he says as his thumb coaxes Fai’s jaw to drop.

A whimper escapes him just before Kurogane is on him again. His tongue slips in, running along Fai’s teeth, licking at the roof of his mouth, drawing gasp after  gasp of virginal inexperience from his lips. “Good,” he breathes, not even sure the word is audible with how thin his voice is.

“What,” Kurogane’s voice is curt and impatient but, Fai is unphased. He understands in his own way that the more time they spend talking the less time they are spending trying to melt into each other.

Regardless, his mind is hazy with every new sensation, from Kurogane’s fist grasping the hair at the base of his neck to his hand splayed out across Fai’s ribs, the span of which is so wide Kurogane’s thumb can confidently run over Fai’s nipple and bring it to attention. “Good,” he says again, mind clouded with lust. “It feels good.”

Fire runs through Kurogane’s eyes as he breathes in so quickly through his nose there’s a noise. Without words he hauls Fai up by the waist causing him to wrap his legs around Kurogane’s hips on instinct. Fai’s back hits the door with such force it nearly knocks the wind from him. His fingers claw at Kurogane’s back for support as his mouth crashes back into Fai’s but, it doesn’t linger.

His mouth slips away, lips dragging along Fai’s cheek, biting at his jaw before his mouth falls open as he pulls away to lick a wide stripe from Fai’s collarbone to his lips. Fai moans at the feeling. Just when he’s begun to think that  _ this _ is the pinnacle of of bodily pleasure Kurogane rolls his hips forward, making his hardness known and bringing focus to Fai’s own need. He repeats the motion and  _ fuck _ there are so many layers of clothing between them, he shoves the vest off Kurogane with such force the leather strap around his neck comes undone and falls with it. 

They aren’t kissing anymore so much as they are breathing into each other's mouths with each of them taking turns dipping forward and licking into the other, pulling away, and nipping at each other’s lips. The heat between them builds until Kurogane is no longer rolling his hips but, snapping them firm and fast into Fai’s groin. The friction brings on wave and  wave of pleasure until Fai impulsively bites at the meat of Kurogane’s shoulder hard enough to rip a growl that verges on  _ primal _ from his throat.

Kurogane leans in close to him, his mouth dragging along Fai’s cheek until he can lick the shell of his ear. “I want to fuck you.”

Fai’s whole body constricts around Kurogane as he whimpers with his forehead pushed into Kurogane’s shoulder.  _ Yes, yes, yes, _ the words echo in his mind. Being an Oracle he knows what sex is and how it’s done but, he’s never gotten so far to think about doing it himself knowing he would never be chosen to cultivate life. Still, he has a vague idea of what sex between men entails and- “I want to open you up and feel how tight you are when I’m inside you.”

The noise Fai makes is pitiful his whole body feels weak even as he clings tighter to Kurogane.  _ Masters, _ he wants to  _ move _ ! He wants to meet Kurogane’s thrusts, touch his body without having to worry about falling, run his mouth over the peaks and and valleys of Kurogane’s stomach- “I want to ruin you. Make it so you never forget what it feels like to have me inside you.” He sucks Fai’s earlobe. “Do you want that?”

Fai nods furiously against Kurogane’s shoulder. “Please,” the word chokes him with how much need there is behind it. The word hasn’t even fully left his mouth when Kurogane starts moving away from the door, his arms supporting Fai’s weight as he’s carried. At the bed he turns around, sitting so that Fai is now in his lap.

Moving hasn’t stopped the momentum but, there is a brief pause. His arms relax around Kurogane’s neck where they had ended up in the move from door to bed. He cards his fingers through shorter parts Kurogane’s hair. He’s been so caught up in what it’s like to be touched he is only now appreciating what it’s like  _ to _ touch. His hair is soft and just long enough to push over his ears, looking slightly unkempt. He uses a finger to trail along the base of Kurogane’s neck, following the thin braid until it ends between his shoulder blades.

Kurogane lets him touch and explore, never looking away from Fai’s face even though Fai is finding it difficult to make eye contact. It’s almost as if looking at each other would force them to acknowledge the magnetism between them, the innate pull that tells Fai, at least in the furthest corner of his mind, that this is more than desire. It’s inevitability.

He pulls back to admire the strength of Kurogane’s chest, the thickness of his arms, the scars that adorn his bronzed skin. Kurogane’s hands come to Fai’s hips, running up and down Fai’s sides. “Are you done?”

A small smile comes over him, he doesn’t look at Kurogane’s face being too afraid of what it could mean to do so. “You’re,” no word seems like enough to encompass how astounding Kurogane is but, he settles for, “beautiful.”

“Shut up.”

Fai’s finger runs down the length of Kurogane’s chest acknowledging the physical power Kurogane’s body is capable of. “You could hurt me.”

Softly, “I won’t.” A thumb presses into his still clothed cock and Fai let out a soft cry.

He leans in and leaves a hot trail of  opened mouth kisses from Kurogane’s mouth to his ear. A whisper, “Touch me.”

Kurogane breathes in through his nose, his hand comes to Fai’s lower back pushing him so Fai is forced to his knees, putting his head above Kurogane. He grabs Fai’s mouth with his own, pushing his tongue past Fai’s lips. 

Whatever atmosphere that had come between them as Fai had taken his time to indulge in Kurogane’s form is gone and replaced with an animalistic desire. Kurogane’s nails rake down Fai’s back leaving lines of burning red as his mouth latches onto Fai’s neck. His tongue is wet and soft in contrast with how his teeth nip at Fai’s skin. 

He pulls away from Fai’s neck and when he looks to Kurogane, he sees that his eyes are clouded, his pupils blown wide, and his chest swells knowing it’s for him. It’ s immensely satisfying to know that he is the reason this man, such a pillar of dominance, is powerless in his desire for him. He doesn’t  question for one second that if he were to tell Kurogane to stop that he would even though, physically, Fai wouldn’t be able to prevent him from continuing.

He licks once more at the spot on Fai’s neck before pressing two fingers there. “That should be enough.”

“For what?”

He kisses Fai again, their mouths crashing into each other. “You’ll see in the morning. Now tell me how the fuck to get this off of you.” Kurogane punctuates his point by tugging at the band wrapping around Fai’s chest that keeps the halter top tight against his body. 

His voice shakes at the realization that soon they will be skin to skin. Soon, he’ll feel the warmth of Kurogane’s body against his own. “There’s a clasp at the back." 

Not having to be told twice, Kurogane has it undone before Fai can get the one at the back of his neck but, it follows soon after. The top is thrown to the floor and forgotten as soon as it’s out of sight. 

Without warning Kurogane grabs him by the waist and Fai finds himself laid out in the center of the bed, breathless. He raises himself up on his elbows just in time to see Kurogane put his tongue to his navel and lick up to his nipple where he sucks, licks, and bites until Fai’s chest is flush with the heat coursing through his body. When he moans he catches Kurogane turn his eyes upwards to gage his reaction and though he can’t see it he knows Kurogane smiles against his chest, satisfied. 

His hands come to the waistband of Fai’s pants, tugging them down to his knees before Fai can kick them off. Kurogane sits up on his haunches and pauses, causing Fai to become increasingly nervous as he stares down at him. “You too,” he manages.  

His hand comes to Fai’s hip, running up the length as his thumb dips into his hip bone. “What?” his response is delayed, almost as if it hadn’t occurred to him he’s supposed to respond.

With his voice thick Fai replies, “It’s not fair that you’re the only one that gets to look.”

Kurogane casts his eyes up, looking through his lashes at Fai. His gaze makes Fai’s chest feel light with how powerful Kurogane’s presence feels. “How did you think I felt earlier?”

Fai sticks his tongue out, cheeky, and Kurogane smiles with a short laugh, that might as well be a huff, as he looks away. The smile wanes from his face and when he looks back to Fai, his face is firm. “Have you,” he pauses a moment. “Have you done this before?”

His body is starting to feel loose, “They won’t even say my name, let alone touch me.”

Kurogane nods in acknowledgement. The heat has gone for a moment, lost somewhere between their words but, lingering on the fringes of their conversation. He leans over Fai, kisses him softly. “After they  _ bathed _ you-”

“I bet you loved that.” Fai makes himself laugh and is punished when Kurogane pinches his side, which only makes him laugh more. 

“Shut up,” there’s no fire behind the words.

He grabs Kurogane’s face and tugs him down so he can kiss wherever his mouth can reach. Cheek, nose, forehead, eyelid, chin, and a trail of kisses peppered over the length of his scar before Fai comes back to his mouth where Kurogane returns the kiss multiple times. Closed mouth, quick, and gentle. 

“Did they leave any of those oils behind?” 

Fai tilts his head back and looks across the room to the opposite wall where they’ve left a trolley of luxury items. “Over there.”

Kurogane’s eyes follow Fai’s gaze and he nods.

The way the warmth of Kurogane’s body pulls away as he leaves the bed has Fai aching for him to come back. He rolls over, his neglected cock rubbing against the linen as he does so. His eyes scan over the side of Kurogane’s form, there are new areas of it for him to see. The strong lines of Kurogane’s calves and thighs and the hard, round muscles of his backside cause Fai to sigh contently against the bed spread. He catches Kurogane’s gaze and turns to hide his grin. 

Fai watches Kurogane’s fingers dip into one of the jars and pull away covered in oil. He taps his fingers together and pulls them apart, studying how the viscous liquid stays together in fine strands. “What are you laughing at?” He turns to face Fai fully, his proud erection bobbing heavily as he does.

“Nothing.” He pulls his arm under himself and Kurogane takes a step forward. “Wait.”

Kurogane stops on command but, Fai can see the line of tension in his jaw. “What am I waiting for?”

His eyes soak up the image of Kurogane in the nude, haloed by the yellow light of the various sconces, and  _ this is really happening. _ He takes in the length and girth of Kurogane’s manhood, his eyes wide and hungry. It’s hard to gage just how large it is from his point of view, even as he tilts his head for a different angle. “Will you touch it?”

His eyes flick to Kurogane’s face just in time to see him cover it with his forearm to hide his embarrassment. Kurogane’s voice is tight. “You’re so fucking weird.” Still, his hand drops from his face and takes hold of his cock at the base, pulling it up against his stomach to reveal the underside. 

Fai swallows as he watches Kurogane run his fist up and down his length, his foreskin pulling away to reveal the engorged and ruddy tip. His fist only covers half his length at any given time and his fingers only  _ just _ overlap and Fai can’t help but whisper, “Everything about you is big, isn’t it.”

Kurogane breathes in through his nose, his resolve cracking. “Idiot,” is voice warns. 

“I’m ready.”

In three long strides, Kurogane is at the bed, corked bottle of oil in hand. Fai goes to turn over on his back but, Kurogane straddles his legs and coaxes Fai down by his shoulders. “Stay like this for now.”

He gasps when he can feel Kurogane’s cock sliding against the cleft of his ass. Then Kurogane’s weight settles over him. “You feel me?” Kurogane’s voice is razor sharp and Fai can almost see the arrogant smile on his face. He kisses Fai’s jaw, right beneath his ear. “I’m going to open you up now. Get you ready. So slow.” Fai shivers when Kurogane’s finger begins to circle his hole, slick with the oil he’s grabbed from the cart.

“It’ll be uncomfortable at first,” Kurogane’s finger taps against Fai’s entrance just as he nips his ear and starts kissing backwards along Fai’s neck. “But, when it passes you’ll be begging for me to fill you up.” He continues his trail of kisses until he reaches the center area between Fai’s shoulder blades. “Just relax for me and then I’m going to make you feel so good,” Kurogane’s finger pushes through the outer rim confidently and in one fluid motion while he leaves wet,  open mouthed kisses along Fai’s shoulders.

His whole body goes rigid at the intrusion. It doesn’t hurt but, it’s not painless. It doesn’t feel good but, it doesn’t feel bad. Still all he can focus on is how foreign it feels and the more he focuses on that the tighter his chest feels and that tightness starts making him panic and the room falls away and his whole world comes down to - “Breathe.” Kurogane kisses the side of his neck an action that feels cold against his flushed skin. 

He lets out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. 

“Deep,” kiss, “even,” kiss, “breaths.” 

Fai nods his head and Kurogane’s finger curls inside him. His jaw drops open at the new sensation and stays open when Kurogane starts a slow but steady thrust “Oh,” the word is dragged up from deep inside him.

“How does it feel?”

“I’m not sure,” his voice is wispy as Kurogane’s finger slides in easier, faster. 

He noses along the back of Fai’s jaw, “Does is hurt?” His mouth closes over the top of his ear.

“No.” It doesn’t hurt, it’s just a feeling now. Kurogane’s finger starts twisting as he pushes it in and pulls it out.

“ Mmm ,” he hums against Fai’s neck. “I’m going to add another.” Fai nods, rising up on his elbow. Kurogane’s finger pulls nearly all the way out and a second slick digit comes up to join it. “Deep breath.”

Fai moans as the second one squeezes in alongside the first. “That feels -” His voice cuts out when Kurogane’s fingers wiggle inside him. 

“How does it feel?”

“-different,” Fai breathes. Before Kurogane can ask, “It doesn’t hurt.”

“Good,” Kurogane presses his forehead into Fai’s back as his hips move, finding friction against the globe of Fai’s ass. “I can’t wait to be inside you.” His fingers pull apart inside Fai and he grips the bedding. Fingers still spread Kurogane pulls out, stretching the rim before brining he fingers back together, pushing back in, and repeating the motion. “You’re so tight but, you take my fingers so well.” 

He scissors Fai open until the burn subsides and the strangeness of the feeling starts turning into the very fringes of pleasure. His breathing increases and he bows his head in a whimper. “I think you’re ready for another.” 

Fai nods rapidly. Something primal tells him he that he wants more. He notices the third finger the way he might notice a branch grazing his cheek, it’s surprising at first followed by a faint sting but, then it subsides.

It doesn’t take long until Kurogane’s fingers are moving in and out faster than they have been this whole time and Fai pushes the top of his head into the bed, his heavy breathing leaving a wet spot. 

“You’re almost ready.” Kurogane’s voice is tight with need. His mouth comes up right beside Fai’s ear. “I’ve been holding out on you.”

Fai looks over his shoulder dazed. “You’ve  wha -” The noise he makes next is inhuman. His fingers flex outward until the back of his hands are arched and then the tension breaks allowing him to grip the sheets. On instinct his hip come up, following Kurogane’s fingers as they pull out. He looks over his shoulder and Kurogane is grinning like a man who has seen the conclusion of a drawn out  plan . 

“I bet you liked that.”

He’s helpless but to nod against the bedding and then it happens again, Kurogane’s fingers curl deep inside and it’s like the winds been knocked out of him. He plants his fists against the bed and grasps the blanket so tightly his arms shake and Kurogane does it again. “ _ Oh, fuck, _ ” every part of the phrase is as tense with pleasure as his body is.

“See, you do.”

Fai’s feel like he’s just run the length of the beach with how hard he’s breathing.

“Think about how good it’s going to feel when my cock’s inside you. How full I’m going to make you. How deep I’m going to go. And I’m going to make you feel like  _ this, _ ” Kurogane’s fingers curl inside him again and he screams, “the whole time.” He licks a stripe up Fai’s back causing him to shake at the sensation. “Are you ready for me to be inside you?”

“Yes. Please. I want you to be inside me.” Fai’s voice is loud and rushed and then silent when Kurogane’s pulls his fingers out. It’s strange how he can feel himself trying to close up, his entrance fluttering and cold without Kurogane to keep him open and warm. 

Kurogane’s hand come to his hip and he can feel him getting into position when he reaches his hand back. “Wait,” he coughs because his throat is so raw. 

“What’s wrong?”

Fai shakes his head back and forth. “Not like this. I want to see you.”

It takes a second but, Kurogane helps him turn over and now it’s all too real. Everything Fai had feared earlier is confirmed when he’s able to see Kurogane’s face. His eyes hazy with lust but, the shape of his mouth unsure. “Hi,” he says because it’s like seeing Kurogane for the first time all over again. 

“Hey,” Kurogane replies. He visibly swallows. “It’s different-”

“When we can see each other,” Fai finishes for him. He glances away, “What do you think that means?”

“I-,” Kurogane pauses, licks his lip. “I don’t know. Do you want to talk about that now?” His voice is patient but, Fai can sense the underlying restraint.

“Not really.”

Kurogane leans in to kiss him. It’s a softer gesture than Fai expected. Kurogane brings his legs under himself so he’s sitting back on his haunches but, still able to keep his face close to Fai due to his height. He drags Fai’s hip into his groin and he can feel Kurogane’s member poking at his entrance. Against the corner of Fai’s mouth, “One more time, deep breath.”

Fai inhales and as he does Kurogane pushes inside him. His hand slaps Kurogane’s chest, his fingers splaying out over his left pectoral muscle before coming together into a fist, his nails digging into Kurogane as it does. 

Three fingers pale in comparison to Kurogane’s girth. It would have knocked the wind from him if Kurogane hadn’t been repeating into his ear, in some far off voice, “Breathe out slowly. Slowly. Slower, idiot.”

Once his chest is completely deflated, he takes a slow breath in, opens eyes that he didn’t even realize he’d closed, and tries to comprehend the feeling of being filled. Kurogane’s hand comes up and pushes Fai’s hair away from his face. “Did I hurt you?” He sounds genuinely concerned.

It aches but, not so much that Fai would say he’s in pain. It’s a good ache, so deep in his muscles that his limbs feel pliant and loose. “No.” His words are lazy, “You feel warm.” 

“Idiot.” Kurogane spits but, Fai can tell he’s embarrassed

He brings his arms up to anchor himself by laying them across the back of Kurogane’s neck. Swallowing, “Does it feel good for you.”

At this Kurogane snorts. “Don’t ask me that. I’m already trying not to cum.”

“I must be a natural.” 

Kurogane gently shoves Fai’s face to the side. “Don’t be a dumbass. I did all the hard work.”

“Oh,” Fai cocks his head, “I don’t remember you taking three fingers and a dick in your ass.”

He frowns, “My hand was cramping.”

Fai frowns and sniffs dramatically. “ Aww . Poor Kuro-” Whatever bastardization of Kurogane’s name was about to come out of his mouth is cut short by a deep moan as Kurogane rolls his hips forward. Fai feels his whole chest flush and go red.

Kurogane’s hips still, waiting for comment.

“More,” Fai rasps. Above him, Kurogane rises up, so he’s looking down at him. Fai’s lower back rests along Kurogane’s thick thighs and arches when Kurogane moves again. “I said  _ more. _ ”

“I’m trying not to hurt you,” Kurogane’s voice is tight.

“I’m fine. I’ll tell you if it hurts.”

Kurogane looks him straight in the eye. “If you say that, you better mean it. If you let me hurt you, I’ll beat you ‘til you’re stupid.” 

“Sounds like you won’t have to beat me very much then.”

“I’m serious.”

Fai pulls Kurogane down and kisses his eyelid. “I’ll tell you, I promise.”

Seemingly satisfied, Kurogane reaches behind himself for a pillow, sits up, and pulls Fai’s left leg over his shoulder. He starts pushing Fai back until he’s almost fully raised on his knees and Fai’s back is a little less than a forty-five degree angle. Kurogane’s stuffs the pillow under him, leans over Fai, and kisses him as he starts to roll his hips. 

Fai’s hands search from something to hold on to and he finds Kurogane’s thighs, fingernails digging into tight muscle. Every thrust makes his breath catch and the feeling of Kurogane moving inside of him building speed until his hips start coming away from Fai’s ass and slam back into him is exhilarating. There’s no other feeling like it but, he’s waiting. He knows how Kurogane  _ can _ make him feel. He’d promised-

Kurogane sits back a little, adjusting their angle and then it happens. His whole world shrinking down to the feeling pulsing through his body, hitting him again and again and he’s dying. He feels himself dying, feels his breath coming just as fast as it leaves him and, “ _ Fuck! There! There! ~” _

He wraps his arms around Kurogane, the way his weight pulls them makes Kurogane’s right arm come up to support Fai’s back and his left come down to the bed to hold their position. Clinging to him Fai bites Kurogane’s neck, lost in pleasure his body doing everything it can to bring them closer together. 

Nails dragging along Kurogane’s back, sure to leave marks.

Legs wrapped so tightly around Kurogane’s waist that the place where Fai’s heels dig into his backside might just  bruise . 

Mouth biting, sucking, kissing wherever he can reach and-

“ _ More!”  _ Fai peels his head away from Kurogane’s shoulder and uses his hand to direct Kurogane’s gaze to him. Acting on instinct he sticks his tongue out and runs it up the length of Kurogane’s scar. Kurogane whines and it’s the first time Fai hasn’t felt completely at his mercy. The look of vulnerability that passes over his face at Fai’s word disappears when he grabs Fai’s mouth with his own, plunging his tongue in without regard for skill or the need to breathe. 

His fingers scratch behind Kurogane neck while his thumb pulls over the scar on his cheek, feeling the wetness his tongue left behind. They’re both wrecked and Fai can’t help but feel like they’ve done this before. The whole song and dance they’ve been playing at since the island. “Look at me when you  _ fuck me _ .”

When Kurogane meets Fai’s gaze, his eyes are hard, red in the low lighting. His face makes Fai breathless. “Tell me,” he swallows, catches his breath, and, “what it’s like to have me inside of you.”

Kurogane thrusts hard and hits whatever it is inside of him that makes Fai melt. “So good. You feel so good.” Their position changes with Kurogane sitting back on his calves making it so Fai is in his lap as he drags him up and down the length of his cock.

In this new position Fai can move more easily. He sets one hand on the bed then the other, keeping his body level with Kurogane’s groin, and begins to thrust back into him as Kurogane pulls him into his hips. “So big, Kuro. So big inside me.”

“ _ Fuck _ ,” Kurogane chokes. “You’re so fucking tight.” 

When Kurogane’s hand comes up to fist his cock Fai screams. He hadn’t forgotten about his own arousal but, he had been otherwise preoccupied. Kurogane spits, using his saliva to ease the friction as he pumps Fai with a messy rhythm. 

Fai’s breathing starts to build, Kurogane seems to be reaching the very depths of the pleasure within him on almost every thrust and - “Fuck. I’m - I’m-” -and then he does. His body goes rigid, his toes dig into the bed pushing him up, and Kurogane keeps pounding into him, relentless in his movement, hand squeezing every last drop from him. 

His arms give out and his vision fades, for a moment there is only darkness. He comes to with Kurogane’s hand is on his face and his pace slowed significantly. “Keep going,” Fai’s voice is small and he can tell Kurogane has his doubts which, if they were spoken, he wouldn’t be able to hear over the ringing in his ears, anyway. “I want you to finish.”

Kurogane leans over and kisses various parts of Fai’s face. His mouth lands next to Fai’s ear and just as the ringing subsides, “So good. You’re so good Fai.” He licks a long stripe up Fai’s neck. “Like you were made for me. Just for me,” he repeats.

Above him Kurogane eyes close and he stills, Fai’s hand comes up to cradle his face. It’s with a cloudy mind that he watches Kurogane’s mouth fall open, silent until a deep growl is pulled up from the depths of his soul. His hips stutter and Fai becomes aware of a liquid heat filling him up inside. 

They stay like that, Kurogane breathing hard and Fai running his thumb back and forth over his cheek. Without opening his eyes Kurogane turns into Fai’s touch finds his thumb, bites gently as he closes his lips around the appendage, and slowly pulls off.

 

* * *

 

Kurogane collapses on top of Fai completely spent. He’s never - god it’s so absurd he’s not sure he can even finish the thought in his mind but, still he knows it’s true. He’s never had sex with  _ feelings _ . What feelings?  _ Masters _ , he’s not even sure but, he knows Fai isn’t just another fuck. Not just another one of the men he fools around with back home. No, with them it’s just good enough to get his and leave it at that.

But, all he wanted from the moment he’d backed Fai into the door was to make him feel good. He’d meant it when he said he wanted to make it so Fai would never forget but, the deeper darker though that lies under that scares even Kurogane. He’d wanted to ruin Fai in that he would never be able to have sex without thinking of him. He wanted to make it so that Fai could never forget the shape of him, the weight of him, the feeling, the thinly veiled tenderness lurking just beneath the surface.

Hugging Fai to his chest he rolls until they are on their sides. He hasn’t pulled out just yet wanting to let himself go soft in that tight heat but, also because it’ll be easier on Fai to pull out when he’s flaccid. He feels Fai’s arm come up over his side, his hand grabbing Kurogane’s shoulder. 

He pulls back a little to look at Fai’s face. His eyes flutter open. “Don’t fall asleep yet.”

“Why?” Fai’s tone is teasing.  _ Good _ , that means there’s still some life left in him. “Are you going to make me go back to my room?” More urgently, “ _ Are _ you going to make me go back to my room?”

“This is your room.” 

“Oh.”

Kurogane cards his fingers through Fai’s hair easily, but there’s a tightness in his chest. A nervousness. “Do you want me to go back to mine?”

Fai must sense it to because instead of answering with words, words would make it all too real, he pushes his face into Kurogane’s chest.

Pressing his mouth to the crown of Fai’s head, “Did I hurt you?” Fai shakes his head against Kurogane’s chest. “Are you sure? You passed out.”

He shrugs. “I think that means you did a good job.”

Kurogane snorts. “I’ve never done that good a job then.”

There’s a pause before Fai speaks. “I know,” he seems to search for the words. “You treated me well. I know you did.” His arms slips down to Kurogane’s waist. “I imagine a lot of people don’t get that much consideration their first time. Not in my experience anyway.”

“Let’s not talk about home.”

“ Mmm .”

He sits up on his elbow a bit. “I’m going to pull out now.” Using his hand to steady Fai’s groin he draws his hips back and slips free. If there’s any discomfort Fai doesn’t show it. “Stay here,” he kisses Fai’s eyelid. “I’ll be right back.” 

Standing is hard, his legs feel boneless the first few steps but, then he gets his bearings. Going to the attached washroom he grabs a pitcher of water and a cloth before returning to the bed. He sits with his knees thrown over the side of the mattress which is close enough to do what needs to be done.

He pulls Fai’s legs open, coaxing him onto his back. A single blue eye appears to look at him. “I don’t think I have it in me to go again.”

Neither does he but, he’s not going to tell Fai that. “I’m cleaning you up, idiot.” He dampens the cloth and uses it to wipe down the inside of Fai’s thighs and everything else between his legs. “This might be uncomfortable.” Before Fai can even ask what Kurogane has two fingers inside him.

Fai groans, not in a good way. “I told you-”

“I’m getting everything out of you so it doesn’t hurt later.”

“It’s sore.” Fai’s voice is  small , sleepy.

“I know. I’ll go slow.” He hooks his fingers inside, pulling out everything he left behind and wipes it onto the cloth. Satisfied, he throws the cloth on the ground and crawls up the bed next to Fai. Like a magnet, Fai turns into him his head coming to rest on Kurogane’s arm with his nose and mouth pressed into his chest. 

Kurogane doesn’t have to ask to know Fai’s sleeping now. He’s tired himself, so he can only imagine how drained Fai must be. _He_ _blacked out for fucks sake._ He’d said he was fine and so Kurogane decides it’s okay to let himself find some pride in that. 

They’ve nearly completed their mission and once that’s done they’ll have to figure out whatever this  _ thing  _ that lies between them is. 

 

* * *

 

They wake up to a knock on the door. “High Oracle?”

Fai huffs next to him, still pulling himself from unconsciousness. 

“Your companion has gone missing, do you-”

“I’m in here!” Kurogane shouts at the door. “What the fuck do you want?” He’s risen with the sun almost every day since he was a teenager but, nobody ever said Kurogane was  _ happy _ about being an early morning person

“So sorry, Sir! Empress Yuuko was wondering if you’ll be ready to depart within the hour.”

“Fuck.” He whispers and hauls himself out of bed drawing a less than pleased whine from his bedmate. Forgoing his pants he gabs a pillow and holds it in front of his junk when he opens the door. “We need the clothes we arrived in to be returned to us and breakfast and,  uh ,” what did his mother call it? “Salves.”

The entirely embarrassed attendant can’t even make eye contact with him. “Right away and will you need the help of an att-”

“No.” He closes the door, drops the pillow, and crawls back into bed. 

“Kuro-rude,” Fai pokes his chest. “There’s no reason to be so mean. ”

“I was being efficient.” He pulls Fai into him, marveling at the feeling of waking up next to somebody. He’s never let anybody stay in his bed, though this is really Fai’s bed, he supposes. If he wasn’t convinced Fai was going to hate him the rest of the day for his aching body he’d push him into the mattress and open him up again. Take it slow. Make him beg for it.  _ Really _ beg.

Fai puts a finger to Kurogane’s nose, catching him off guard. “You’re thinking salacious thoughts.”

“Shut up,” he pushes Fai’s finger away. “How would you know?”

His voice is almost giddy when he responds. “Because I am too.”

“We can’t-”

“It would be physically impossible right now.” Fai looks up at him through his lashes and Kurogane’s heart quickens. “I’m so sore.”

“I  _ told- _ ” 

“You didn’t hurt me. I might be sore but, it feels good to be sore.” He runs a hand down Kurogane’s neck and then his eyes go wide. “What’s that? You have a bruise.”

Kurogane looks down to where Fai is staring at his shoulder. “No, that’s a hickey.”

“A what.”

“You’re covered in them. We both are,” Kurogane’s mouth quirks up as Fai makes to get out of bed, he has to catch himself on the bedpost to keep from falling. He snorts.

“Shut up!” Fai yells at him as he stands and makes his way to the closest mirror. “I-! I look like I was attacked by mosquitos!” Offended, he turns to Kurogane who can now fully appreciate his work. “Is this what you meant by ‘You’ll see in the morning!’”

The left side of Fai’s neck and across his collar bone is almost completely covered in bite marks. Shaped to look like a wave crashing into the side of a cliff as they build up his neck.

Fai’s eyes narrow. “Does everybody know what these mean?” His fingers drag over the lingering evidence from last night.

Kurogane grins, “The children won’t.” 

Fai frowns at Kurogane’s joke. “At least feel a little bad.”

“What about you?” Fai cocks his head. “Pretty sure you drew blood last night and I’m not complaining.”

“I did not!” Kurogane sits up with his back to Fai. “How does it look?”

Behind him he can feel the mattress dip with Fai’s weight as he crawls over to Kurogane. Fai’s cold fingers are soothing against the red hot scratches all over his back. Quietly, “If feels good to mark someone.”

Kurogane looks over his shoulder. “It does.”

They stare at each other and Kurogane swears Fai gets seemingly more attractive  everytime he sees him. “We should get up. I’m sure they’re going to be here soon.” Kurogane’s watches Fai go around picking up clothes, wincing when he bends over but, doing it anyway.

“They’re probably going to make people clean the room after we leave today.”

“I suppose but-” He scoops up his pants from the previous night. “I’m not use to people picking up after me.” 

It’s endearing to watch Fai limp around the room doing his best to clean even though he doesn’t have to. “Don’t you have people to pick up after you back home?”

“I could if I wanted but, I live outside the village, actually. Only way I can get a break from  _ High Oracle  _ this  _ High Oracle _ that.” 

Kurogane notes that Fai lives outside the village and decides it’s a positive thing because he has every intention of having sex with Fai as often as -

“What’s this.” Fai’s tone is flat, there is no question in his voice.

He looks up and dangling from Fai’s finger is his pendant. His mouth drops open. “I -”

“You?”

“I -” the truth, “I don’t know what to say.”

He watches Fai pinch the bridge of his nose and he can tell this conversation is not going to end well. “I thought it was mine but, I put mine in the box by the bed before dinner last night and this one is on a strap.” Fai breathes in, “How long have you had it?”

“My whole life.”

“So, when I showed you mine you didn’t think it might be a good idea to mention you had one too?” Kurogane swallows when he sees anger forming in Fai’s eyes. “You  _ know _ how alone having this  _ thing _ has made me feel my whole life and you-” Fai breathes in deep hand coming to his face, running down it with irritation. 

Kurogane feels compelled to fill the silence but, Fai beats him to it.

“Leave. I need to think.”

His brows pinch together. He’d accepted that they were probably going to fight right now but, “What?”

“Just,” Fai walks over, beautiful even when angry, and shoves the necklace into Kurogane’s chest. “Leave.”

Kurogane stands as Fai walks away towards the wash room. “Why?”

Fai whips around. “Because I feel like you lied to me!”

“No I didn’t! I just didn’t say anything to you,” even to him that’s a terrible excuse.

“I am a  _ professional _ liar! I lie about who I am, how I can do what I do, and I  _ told _ you the truth. I  _ showed _ you  _ my _ truth and you didn’t even think  _ once  _ -”

“It doesn’t matter!” He doubles down already hating himself for whatever he’s about to say out of anger. It doesn’t even cross his mind to tell Fai the truth that he’s just not ready to talk about it because the idea of saying that makes him feel weak. Instead he says, “I barely know you! How does having one of these  _ things _ ,” he gestures awkwardly to his hand, “make us have a connection? It doesn’t! You don’t know anything about me and I know  _ shit _ about you. So, get off your fucking high horse.”

Fai nods his head slowly and looks up to Kurogane with an icy stare that pins Kurogane where he stands. He immediately tries to take it back, “Fai -”

“High Oracle.”

“What?”

“High Oracle. Like you said-” He takes a step forward and Kurogane backs up towards the door. “You don’t know me and I don’t know you. You’re the  _ future _ Chieftain of Suwa meaning you have no  _ true _ power over me. There’s no reason for me to be friendly because I  _ do _ have power. I’m the  _ High Oracle _ of Celes and our tribes are at a  _ very _ important political crossing so I suggest you do what I say and  _ leave.”  _

Kurogane’s back hits the door, just last night in this same spot he’d broken the tension between them and they’d fallen into bed promoting the feelings and thoughts he’s been having to come to the forefront of his mind. 

“You’re not welcome here.” Fai turns on his heel and marches into the washroom, leaving Kurogane little choice but to pull on his pants from the previous night and exit the room just in time for the attendant to return.  

He grabs her by the forearm. “Make sure somebody comes to help him with the salves and,” he takes a look at the clothing in her hand and grabs his off the top. “Nevermind.”

“Oh,” she sounds confused. “Okay.”

He lets her go and finishes his retreat across the hall to a bedroom he hardly remembers. 

 

* * *

 

When Kurogane arrives at the front of the chateau he does everything he can to look like he’s ignoring Fai when, in reality, he can’t stop himself from following his movements. He’s off to the side of the small entourage with Yuuko. Fai’s face shows no sign of the irritation from earlier and though he knows it’s a benign want he can’t help but hope that Fai has moved on. He makes his way over to them, he’s involved in this situation just as much as Fai is so there’s no reason for  _ him _ to not be part of their discussion 

When Fai spots him he stops talking mid-sentence, “Kurogane,” he says his name with perfect pronunciation and it makes him alarmingly uncomfortable. “I was just discussing with Yuuko how the day will pan out. Once we reach Mother Mountain and I validate the amount of  medicine they can provide and take note of their recipe we will then tour the Room of Visions before discussing the Eye with her. Meanwhile, we need a metal beast captured for a taming demonstration upon our return and I think it’s best you stay here and help in that endeavour.”

Kurogane’s eyes go wide, “What? No! I’m coming with you.”

Fai looks to Yuuko and smiles with all the sincerity of a fox telling a rabbit it’s safe in its presence. “Empress how do you feel about the situation?”

Yuuko glances between them and Kurogane frowns at how much she knows without being told. “I don’t see a reason for Kurogane to stay here. My men can capture a metal beast without assistance and he should also be given the opportunity to see both the cargo and the Room of Visions first hand.”

He can’t help the smile that comes over him at the look of utter indignation on Fai’s face.

“Chin up, High Oracle.” Yuuko turns away from them, her face somewhere between amused and political. “You’re not a child anymore.”

Once she’s out of earshot he turns to Fai and takes a breath, “About this morning -” He’s not sure how he’s going to explain himself. His plan at this moment is to speak off the cuff but, he doesn’t get a chance to because Fai starts to walk away. 

“It’s already done with. Just-,” a sigh. “Just leave me alone.” He doesn’t sound combative anymore, just  _ tired _ . As if Kurogane is a needy child. 

At this, Kurogane frowns. He’s not use to playing by the rules of others but, he can’t make any headway if Fai won’t talk to him. If this had been just a few days ago he would have blown Fai off, cut his losses, and moved on but, even if he were to do that he doubts they could be kept apart. Even by their own wills. 

It’s another few minutes before the small party rolls out but, when they do Kurogane is ready to move. The energy coursing through him demands release in some way and if Fai won’t talk to him, this is the next best option. He stays at the front of the party, his eyes scanning for danger and his  shalaylee across his back. He’s oddly aware of himself, sensing that Fai is at his back and that his eyes are on him, even though every time he turns back he can’t seem to catch his gaze.  

 

* * *

 

_ Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. _ The whole situation is stupid. 

They’ve been walking for three hours and have finally reached the base of Mother Mountain and begun the ascent to the temple and the whole time he’s thought about Kurogane. His mind teeters from absolute irritation to white hot, mind consuming memories of Kurogane’s body, hands, and mouth all over his body.

Yuuko has been doing a good job of leaving him alone to wallow in his  self pity but, she seems to have finally reached her threshold of patience. “Trouble in paradise?”

Fai glances at her from the corner of his eye. “Don’t want to talk about it.”

“ Mmm , I remember you being moody as a child too.”

“You said something like that earlier and I have to say that I was not a moody child.”

She smiles, “Only with Siben but, you were a child once, High Oracle.”

“Don’t call me that.”

“Fine,” she throws her hands up in surrender. “Besides you couldn’t tell me anything your neck hasn’t already.”

Fai’s hand goes to his throat and he can’t help but instinctively search for Kurogane to glare at.

Yuuko’s tone takes on a serious note. “Did he hurt you?”

“No!” Fai turns to face her head on. “It wasn’t -” he pauses and looks to his feet. “I wanted to.”

“Well if that wasn’t it,” she claps. “Maybe his second  shalaylee wasn’t as good as the rest of him.”

Fai balks, “No, that wasn’t-! I mean - I didn’t look - it was dark!”

She cackles, “I’m sorry, I couldn’t help myself.” He rolls his eyes. If this is what it means to be equals with her, he wishes he wasn’t. Clearing her throat but, the teasing tone remaining in her voice, “Then what’s wrong?”

Taking a moment to consider if he wants to talk to his estranged mentor about this, he looks away. “We fought this morning.”

She raises an eyebrow, “It seemed to me you two had that kind of relationship. A little more fire than most.”

“Maybe. I thought so too but, I don’t know him that well. We only met because of the sickness on the island.”

“Really?” She sounds genuinely surprised. “I would have thought you’ve known each other longer.”

_ Other people see it too. _ “We only met a few days ago. It barely been a week.”

Her voice is almost disinterested when she responds, “Whether it’s annoyance or desire, to have any sort of passionate relationship is rare.” Yuuko puts a hand to his shoulder, “We’ll be there soon. I’m going to make my way to the front.”

He’s never thought of his relationship with Kurogane as passionate. He’s never really thought of their relationship at all. It’s  _ easy _ , even when it’s not. They fight and bicker without provocation but, it never lasts. Just like he knows the fight they’re in now won’t last. Already he wants to seek out Kurogane and call him something ridiculous just to see what his face looks like when he does. Kurogane will insult him but, there will be the hint of a smile in his voice and he won’t tell Fai to leave.

It’s not much longer before they reach the top, Fai’s body aches with how much exertion he’s had to put forth. Walking is already difficult enough without having to hike up a mountain. Regardless, his pain numbs as he stands face to face with a large metal cavern that burrows deep into the mountain side. He scans the small party for Kurogane, hoping to find a little familiarity to ease his sudden apprehension. At the front of the group he sees Kurogane already looking at him. His face gives nothing away. Fai looks down awkwardly and when he looks back Kurogane has moved on. 

At the mouth of the entrance, Fai puts his hand to a thick border that once held a door, not unlike the one back on the island. “Why didn’t the doors close?” He says it to himself but, Yuuko comes up beside him.

“Our history tells us it was because a handful of our ancestors refused to leave and that they became the first of our people to speak with the Goddess. It’s tradition that keeps the priests and healers here. Legend says that if we abandon the Mother Mountain, she’ll close her gates.” Yuuko moves on and Fai follows, he can’t help but to wonder if this is what the inside of their own mountain looks like. 

The path they follow is lined with torches whose light dances across the metal walls. Their footsteps echo with a metallic ting as they travel deeper into the cave. The path starts to tilt downwards as the sunlight fades behind them, leaving the party at the mercy of the firelight. The path seems endless without the sun’s warm glow. He doesn’t like this feeling of being underground, it sends nervousness rippling through his body but, it fades when he sees light in the distance and the path begins to open up, revealing a doorway through which is a large open chamber.

As they pass through the doorway Fai is able to take in how extraordinarily large the cavern is. There are various rooms and halls veering off from the central chamber and people scurry between the various areas carrying bowls, herbs, medallions, clothing - all with a sense of purpose. The sheer number of lights that come into view through the Eye of God is overwhelming. Pinks and blues appear everywhere, highlighting doors and unexplainable  _ instruments _ as  _ Out Of Order  _ or  _ In Need of Repair. _ There are other words and phrases he’s not sure how to comprehend like:  _ Embryonic Stabilization Unit _ .

A few people come over to offer the party refreshments, but Fai pays them no mind. His eyes follow the priests and healers in the temple as they tend to the few sick people that are there. Turning he finds Kurogane, back pressed to a wall and his arms crossed. Fai can sense that he’s apprehensive as well. Nothing about Yuuko or the temple suggests that they are in danger but, it’s still a situation that seems unreal.

“Thank you,” Yuuko’s voice tears his attention from Kurogane, she smiles, and the priests bids their farewell. She turns to Fai. “It sounds like the healers are ready for us. We’ll take inventory there then make our way to the Room of Visions.”

Meeting the healers, taking inventory of the supply they’re being given, and reviewing the recipe for medicine to combat the Red Rage goes quickly. His Eye scans what they’re been given and  _ Antibiotics _ flashes across his vision when he looks at the jared liquid. It’s the same word that he’d seen on the island and now it’s in his hand.

“Do we have enough to take home?” Kurogane’s voice surprises him. He’d been reviewing the instructions given to him by the healers for administration of the medicine and hadn’t heard him approach.

His heart beats heavily in his chest but, he doesn’t turn to face him. “Yes, the amount they’ve gifted up should be plenty to treat both villages. 

“If it’s not?”

“If we need anymore we will have to make ourselves.” 

He can sense Kurogane nod hoping Fai will continue. When he realizes Fai’s done talking he speaks, “Yuuko wanted me to tell you that a few of her men are going to start loading the medicine for travel and depart once they’re done.”

“Thank you.”

Kurogane clicks his tongue, irritated. “We’re also moving over to the vision room or whatever the fuck it’s called.”

Without looking at Kurogane he scans his surroundings and finds Yuuko standing against the frame of the room they’re in. She draws from her pipe and nods at him. “I’ll be right there.”

He can tell Kurogane is trying to hide how frustrated he is being ignored when he walks away without another word. Fai watched him go. Yuuko says something to Kurogane as he approaches but, he’s too far away for Fai to hear what it is. Regardless, he sees the scowl that comes over Kurogane’s face before he stomps away from her and Fai can’t help but to smirk at how childish he can be when he doesn’t get his way.

He joins Yuuko a moment later. “Apologies I-”

“Save your apologies,” She waves him off, smoke from her pipe floating into his face. “Feel free to take your time.” Yuuko pushes off the doorframe and leads Fai back to the central room. “I want you to know-,” she catches his gaze from the corner of his eye. “I don’t know how to accurately explain to Room of Visions. It’s technology left over from the ancients. I’ll explain as much as I can but, it might not be as much as you are hoping for.” She looks around the room, “Oh Kurogane! Over here!” She yells across the chamber as she waves her hands in the air. It’s an entirely unnecessary gesture but, she does it all the same.

Kurogane sneers but, comes over to them anyway. They follow Yuuko through the temple down increasingly desolate hallways until they reach a door that the Eye reads as:  _ Central GPS Services for Quadrant One. _ She stands in front of it and a red dot becomes visible above the door. “ _ Halt for Identi-scan.” _

His eyes go wide at the voice, metallic in nature - not quite human.  _ The voice of the Masters. _ His body breaks out in a cool sweat and without thinking his hand grabs at Kurogane’s wrist. The voice is chilling and so foreign that he feels justified in his nervousness. The dot fans out and begins to scan Yuuko’s body.  “ _ Descendant of Alpha Registry: Margo Shen - Confirmed. Welcome back, Yuuko Ichihara.” _

The door slides open with an audible release of pressure and Yuuko steps forward, glancing behind herself to make sure they follow. Inside, the room is circular and covered in shiny metal sheets from floor to ceiling with metal boxes pushed up against the walls. Similar instruments circle the center of the room along an open barrier beyond which is a circular platform with a large, round bulb implanted in the ceiling. “The Mountain spoke to you.” Fai’s voice is hardly a whisper. His hand drops from Kurogane’s wrist and he steps forward to follow Yuuko in a daze.

“She speaks to many but, talks to few.” Yuuko says as she rounds the center of the room. “There are a few areas of the temple that cannot be accessed without permission from the Goddess and, to date, I am the only one she grants access to.”

“Why you?” He follows and they stop opposite the door at a desk, of sorts, with knobs and flashing lights. He senses Kurogane following them at a distance, stopping to examine the various objects in the room. All relics from a different time. 

Yuuko puts her hand to a black square reading:  _ Holographic Interface Control _ . The square lights up and a blue line runs the length of her hand. The lights in the room dim and the orb at the center begins to hum. The Goddess speaks, “ _ Visualization of GPS in Northwest Hemisphere, activated. _ ”

Light bursts from the orb, filling the column between it and the circular pad on the floor with squares that house what Fai can only describe as visions. Somewhere behind him Kurogane curses.

“I happen to be here the day you two began your journey. The Room of Visions sees through the eyes of the Greatest Beasts in our world. Tallnecks and Metalrays.” She uses three steps off to the left of where they are to descend into the small pit where the column of visions is. 

“Every vision in this column of light is the view from a different Tallneck or Metalray.” She reaches her hand up, touches one of the visions and gives the column of light a spin. “There’s always something to see from the Tallnecks,” she says more to herself than them. She stops the column. “This is one of my favorites. Come look.”

Fai steps down into the depression where the column of light is and is thrown off balance when the column changes into a large square. At first he’s not sure how to interpret the vision. It shows a land without greenery, red dirt, strange spiked trees, and towering red plateaus. It’s unlike anything he’s ever seen. His Eye supplies words and numbers that offer little explanation:  _ Tallneck 27 - 36.9914° N, 110.1939° W - Previously Monument Valley, Arizona of the former United States.  _ The numbers change quickly as the vision seems to pan right. 

“According to the screen’s location stamp, this is a vision from-”

“ _ Arizona?”  _ He looks to Yuuko for confirmation.

“Yes but, how did you know that?”

Fai starts to round the screen but, it seems to turn with him, wanting to be viewed. “The Eye showed me.”

“You said the  _ Tallneck _ is a metal beast?” Kurogane interjects from his place opposite the steps.

“Yes. You don’t have one on your island and the closest one to us is a few days journey.”

“What are they?”

“Towering beasts with four legs and heads the size of the Metalrays. Easily taller than the palace but, they’re no threat.”

Yuuko snaps and the screen retreats. “The Metalrays show very little as they only rise to the surface intermittently, most of the time their screens look like this.” She taps a blackened screen, there seems to be blue light within the darkness but, there’s nothing to illuminate. “So imagine my surprise when not only did one of the Metalrays surface, but remained surface for more than a few hours.”

“Goddess,” she looks up to the ceiling. “Reveal vision from four days ago. Metalray fifty-one. Manual override alert.”

A vision appears like before, black with a glowing blue ambiance. For a moment, nothing happens but then there’s a bright blue glow and the darkness becomes less concentrated as the Metalray breaks the surface of the water. It’s unclear at first what he’s seeing and then the vision starts to change until it’s curved like a fisheye and the view begins to spin slowly until it locks on to a foot standing on its surface the picture scans up and there, in the center of the frame, is Kurogane grinning from the high of just taming a Metalray. His jaw falls open. “What is this?”

“I call it a machine memory. Both of the large beasts seem to have them, though I’ve never found evidence the others don’t but, if they do those memories and visions are not kept here.” Her tone is speculative.

“So this is how you knew we were coming.” Fai reaches out, his fingers brushing the light the same way they would if his eye had pulled up an invisible panel.

“Not quite. Goddess, show map of the Great Beasts. Dated four days ago.” The screens fall away and a topographical map comes into view. There are dots that move along the map, slowly. “The markings on the map indicated the location of a Tallneck or Metalray.” She points to one, “This is where the Arizona vision comes from,” she taps the dot and the same screen from earlier appears over the map. Tapping it again, the vision disappears. “And this-” she drags her finger nearly halfway across the map, “is where we are.” She taps a dot far down on a peninsula and another vision appears.

At first Fai finds it hard to believe that this is a vision of their current location but as the vision move he can make out the roof of the Hitsuzen palace in the distance. “ _ Masters, _ ” he whispers to himself. 

Less couth, “What the fuck?”

Ignoring both of them, Yuuko moves on. “Both of the Great Beasts travel in circles, never swaying from their path. So, when I saw one of the Metalrays diverging from its path and heading straight for my shore, I made sure to watch the vision and in doing so I saw you. I couldn’t believe how you’d matured but, I knew it was you, nevertheless. The Goddess estimated you would arrive in three days time. I sent men to wait for your arrival. I have to admit, I was in shock when they reported you’d made landfall. I’d seen it in the vision but, it was still hard to believe.”

Yuuko comes to join Fai. “Now, I’ve played both my cards, time to play one of yours.”

Fai forces his mouth closed, swallows and gives his honest assessment. “You already hold so much more information than I can give you. It hardly seems like a fair exchange.”

“Fair or not, they are the terms we’ve already agreed to.”

He nods. “Okay.” Pushing his hair back he palms the Eye and removes it from his ear. He holds his hand out in front of him, the triangular metal piece sitting in the center. “This is the Eye of God.”

Yuuko raises her hand to touch it and looks to him for permission. “This is what allowed you to speak with the Metalray?”

“Yes.”

“Where did you find it?” She turns it over in her hand. 

“I didn’t find it. I was born with it.”

“I don’t remember seeing you with it as a child.”

Fai glances away. “I always hid it with my hair.”

Yuuko looks up from her hand. “You say you were born with it?”

“Yes. It was a gift from the Masters.”

She lets out a reminiscent hum. “How does it work?”

Fai scratches the back of his neck. “I wasn’t sure how to explain it until I saw the column of light. It’s not exactly the same, it doesn’t show pictures, but it does show words and sometimes interactive  _ panels _ of sorts.”

“Elaborate.”

“For example, upon entering the initial room all the doorways were labeled with words made of pink and blue light, but it was only visible to me because of the Eye. You were able to turn the column of light even though it’s not a solid object, that’s similar to what was shown to me on the Metalray. There was a hub at the center of the beast and when I looked at it with my Eye it pulled up a few panels with different dials that I was able to interact with. We were able to set a course for Hitsuzen because the Eye also showed a map.”

To herself, “The Great Beasts must share the topographical information they collect.” She turns to him and hands the ear piece back. “Thank you.”

“Can I ask what you plan to do with this information.”

A grin breaks out over her face. “Find one for myself, of course!”

Fai laughs, “Knowledge is power but, power is cumbersome.”

“You sound like a politician.”

“I’m a simple Oracle, Empress.” Together they share a smile. 

Kurogane clears this throat, prompting them to wrap it up. “We still have a beast to tame before the days over.”

Yuuko tilts her head, “In a hurry to get back to your room, Kurogane?” He scowls as her and satisfied she turns back to Fai, “Wait for me at the door. I’ll shut down the Visions.”

Following her direction he exits the pit and walks towards the door, Kurogane turning to follow him as he passes. “ _ Halt for Identi-scan.” _ The red light from earlier appears and scans his body before he can react. 

_ “Beta Member Confirmed - Yuui Flourite of Team Artemis. _ ” Fai’s eyes go wide, at his side Kurogane tenses, and behind him he can feel that Yuuko has gone still. _ “Searching backlog for outstanding data and messages. Standby. _ ”

He turns to Yuuko and they lock eyes, “This hasn’t happened before.” Her voice is calm but, he can that her interest has be piqued. 

Kurogane tugs Fai away from the door, perhaps to put an end to the event none of them understand.

_ “Data found. One Holomessage. Marked urgent. Standby for immediate playback. _ ”

Despite having been turned off, the column of light turns on but, instead of populating with various visions the light begins to take on shape. Fai yanks his arm from Kurogane’s grip and rounds the center of the room, back towards the steps, and comes face to face with a mirror image of himself. He doesn’t have a moment to question what is happening before the reflection of him begins to move.

The man’s face is solemn, downcast before he takes a breath and looks up and out as if addressing all of them. His smile is soft and laced in sadness.  _ “Where to begin?” _ A non-humorous laugh.  _ “If you’re seeing this it means my desperation paid off. I’m Yuui Flourite, a Beta member of Artemis - the subfunction of Gaia responsible for preserving animal life on this dying planet and reintroducing it when the terraforming system has created a habitable world. I won’t rehatch what you’ve already learned from the Apollo program. You know that the Farro Plague brought humanity to its knees with machines that could use biological matter as fuel. They ravaged the Earth, draining it of life and,”  _ a sigh _. “That’s why I’m here, I guess. When I was approached to join Project Horizon Zero Dawn I had my reservations. Anyone would if they were told humanity was coming to an end, that everybody they’ve ever loved and cared for would be turned into fuel at the hands of machines that were supposed to save humanity-,”  _ his voice becomes increasingly hostile and then he lets out another unpleasant laugh, _ “- listen to me, I hear my own bitterness. _

_ “There was really no other option though. If I hadn’t joined, I would have been euthanized. It sounds extreme but, it was a necessary evil to keep the fate of the world underwraps while Project Horizon Zero Dawn was executed. There was a benefit to joining the project as well. It was impossible to save all of humanity. We couldn’t create safe havens for billions of people and secure a future for humanity. I guess, you are that future. Born into a world built on the ruins of a generation with egos large enough to destroy it.  _

_ “I’ve gotten off track. We couldn’t save all of humanity but, every member of the Zero Dawn project was promised room for two family members or loved ones of their choice to live out their natural lived in Elysium - a large sealed bunker that would never open again. Not that we would have wanted it to with machines outside that would have used our bodies as fuel. _

_ “I chose only one person to bring to Elysium with me. I was adopted as a child but, have no mother or father - they passed. I’m told I had a brother that I was separated from as a child but, I never sought him out. Closed adoption anyway, wouldn’t have been able to. No, I chose only Youou.”  _ For the first time Yuui smiles. He rubs his face and the smile is gone.

“ _ Besides the obvious, there were many things lost in the Farro Plague. Time. Wealth. Reason. Purpose.”  _ He pauses to scoff, _ “I’d been a slave to my work before meeting Youou. It was nearly five years ago now. I was working on a military base assisting in research related to DNA. I guess there’s no point in keeping the secret now, they were trying to create super soldiers. Didn’t pan out, the project lost funding. That doesn’t matter though because stationed on that base was Youou.” _

Yuui’s tongue flicks out, running over his lip. _“We didn’t get along at first but, there was something inexplicable between us. Like the gravity between the Earth and the moon we were destined to remain in each other's orbits. It was,”_ he pauses to consider his words, “ _It was scary, almost._ _I could go on, tell you the whole tale of our love. I remember every detail down to what he wore the day I met him. He was touring the base in his dress blues,”_ another smile that wanes quickly. _“We married on a winter day only a year after meeting. I remember the icicles catching the sunlight on our balcony that morning and thinking I’d never been happier.”_

Another sigh, this one longer, deeper,  _ “I accepted my position with the Zero Dawn project shortly before Youou became a Lieutenant General of Operation: Enduring Victory.”  _ Yuui rubs his face again, this time with more frustration. 

“ _ It _ was  _ yet another necessary evil. The world sent wave after wave of human soldiers to fight against the machines of the Farro Plague knowing they were outgunned and outmanned but, their sacrifices were needed to allow time for Zero Dawn to be completed. I knew this and so everyday I had to remind myself that Youou wouldn’t be on the front lines, his rank took him out of the field and let him stay in central command making decisions I know kept him awake most nights. _

_ “His rank also made him one of the few people outside the Zero Dawn project who knew the inevitable outcome of Operation: Enduring Victory. I can’t imagine sending men to war knowing they would die was easy for him. It wasn’t easy for me seeing how much pain it brought him.  _

_ “The vast majority of loved ones chosen by the scientists of the Zero Dawn project had no idea the world was ending, the news was changed, and Youou even told me the military was sending out fabricated messages to the family members of the soldiers that would corroborate what they saw in the news. People had no idea we were losing until the front lines had been pushed back to their homes. Like I was trying to say though, at least we could confide in each other while every other one of my team members had to pray their families were evacuated successfully. Youou knew there would be a place for him in Elysium and despite military orders to stay with command until the end he would be released for evacuation because of my status as a Beta on the project.” _

Yuui hangs his head and groans. _ “Stupid! Stupid man. You might get to know this about him one day but, sometimes he makes decisions only looking at the big picture. The big picture isn’t always the important one!” He squeezes his eyes shut and rubs his forehead.  _

He takes a shaky breath,  _ “The Farro plague breached American shores three weeks ago and the doors to Elysium closed ten days later. Youou was stationed in Washington DC. Knowing his location, an evac team was immediately dispatched to retrieve him and take him to Elysium but, the swarm had arrived a day earlier than expected and-,”  _ Yuui pauses and all at once his face crumbles. Absolutely everything drains from his face as his eyes go vacant. His whole body starts to fold in on itself. His hands grip at the front of his hair, his arms begin to shake as he pulls his whole torso down, all the while his breathing grows more and more frantic. It’s when he’s almost fully crouched that he starts screaming in a raw, shirl voice, “ _ No! No! Please, no. God, please, no!”  _

He lands on the ground with his elbows on his knees, head hanging as he sobs, tears visibly streaming down his face. He presses the bracelet on his wrist and a different image appears. It’s Kurogane but, not. This man doesn’t have a scar and behind him,  _ Masters,  _ Fai thinks to himself.

“What the fuck,” distantly, he hears Kurogane start walking towards the vision.

In the background of the vision there are giant machines, running on three spiked legs, metal tails wiping behind them, and beams of fire coming from its eyes. The scene is horrendous, men’s bodies are scooped up and seemingly eviscerated before being devoured. 

The vision starts moving, “ _ Yuui.”  _ Fai gasps, the man in the vision even  _ sounds  _ like Kurogane. A little late but, it dawns on him that the man in the light is Youou. 

In the vision Youou closes his eye, licks at his upper lip like he can hardly believe what he’s going to say.  _ “The Evac team left Elysium late _ _ and _ _ the swarm got through our front line faster than we’d anticipated. They,  _ _ uh _ _ , they weren’t going to make it in time.” _ Fai’s eyes go wide and his heart sinks. 

“ _ Not before the swarm would reach me, anyway. I, oh fuck,”  _ his voice breaks, “ _ I told them to go back, Yuui. _ ” He clears his throat, clenches his jaw, and blinks away his tears. “ _ I couldn’t let them come here knowing it was pointless. I-I’m so sorry, baby.” His voice cracks again and this time he lets out a choked sob, followed an almost humorous puff. “I only call you that when you’re mad. God,”  _ he looks up, blinking away tears, _ “you’re going to be so mad at me. I could have fallen back earlier but, I had to give the final orders to the front line.”  _ There’s a crash in the background, closer than the rest of the screaming, clashing, and banging. Youou looks over his shoulder, his face paling. He turns back.  _ “Yuui, Yuui, listen to me. I love you. Those words are never enough that’s why I don’t say them often. I try to show how I feel through what I do and I’m sorry the last thing I’m doing is the worst thing I could ever do to you. But I do, I love you so much.” _ Youou’s eyes go wide.  _ “Send message! Send message!” _ He screams as he scrambles backwards. 

The vision blinks away and there’s Yuui sitting against an invisible wall. His face no longer looks at the audience, his eyes cast to the side, and his chin now cupped in his hand. “ _ To live without purpose? That’s difficult to come to terms with. But to live without love? To live without him,” _ Yuui stutters, “ _ \- that would be - that would be torture.” _

He bows his head and breathes in deep.  _ “So, that’s why I made both of you. It took some work. I had to steal the blood they keep on file at Elysium and hijack a drone transporting precautionary seeds to a Demeter Seedling Storage Facility and have it take pods containing our DNA of one of more remote Cradles, an island that use to be Puerto Rico. I was able to hide a function in the Comence Gestation process to delay the beginning of your growth a few hundred years. It was easier to hide the extra pods that way. It’s not ideal but, at least you’ll be born at the same time as each other and since the Cradle facilities are meant to become operational facilities for the settlers it’s easy to imagine they’ll be maintained.” _

Yuui lets out a heavy sigh.  _ “This is disgusting. I can’t believe I did this. God, Youou would hate that I did this and, yet, I still fucking did it. I guess I’m okay with being disgusting because I’m leaving you this message so you know exactly why I did this.”  _

Wiping his nose, he sniffs. “ _ There’s no knowing if, when, or how you’ll see this so I’ve hidden this message in the general database for all facilities but, I’ve left other messages in your cradle of origin. Those are more personal. Videos and pictures of the few years we spent together. I figure if you want to see those you’ll seek them out whereas this message was forced on you. _

_ “I’m sorry, I love you too much to let us end like this.”  _ He pauses, his face full of self-loathing. _ “Isn’t that what Zero Dawn is all about? Just a little bit of hope that humanity won’t end without a fight.” _

The image blinks away.  _ “End Holomessage.” _

Fai sits, deliberately. Where can he even begin to understand everything he’s just been told when he can’t even believe what he’s just seen. But, he  _ had _ seen it. The man who looked like him, the man who looked like Kurogane and - what does it mean? He snaps his head to Kurogane but, can’t find his gaze.

The end of humanity? A world that ended at the hands of terrifying beats? Moreover, how can he even begin to conceptualize that they  _ existed _ in a different life? That they were made to be with each other? And why does that thought make him feel like he can’t breathe? He dry heaves, hand going to his mouth as he swallows down the bile. 

 

* * *

 

If Fai had been ignoring Kurogane before, he’s outright avoiding him now. After the  _ event _ , Kurogane isn’t sure what else to call it, in the vision room Fai had made a very quick retreat, not even stopping to talk to Yuuko who had tried her best to calm him.

They arrived as the sun was beginning to set and at dusk Yuuko’s men has arrived with a caged Watcher which Kurogane had quickly demonstrated he could tame and then sat through a round of Yuuko’s follow up questions the best he can but, his eyes keep searching the courtyard.

“That’s enough,” Yuuko brings their conversation to an end. “Just because you keep looking for him doesn’t mean he’s going to appear out of thin air.” She drinks from the glass in her hand.

“I’m not looking for anyone,” it’s a statement they both know is untrue but, she shows mercy and doesn’t poke holes in his excuse.

She smiles softly, maybe a little pitifully. “He’s in his room. I’ve had attendants go check on him a few times but, he hasn’t eaten. He’s refusing to open the door.”

“Idiot.”

Yuuko steps around him, his eyes following her as she presses against his back, and looks over his shoulder. “You see that girl with the tray?” She points, “She’s going to the kitchen.”

He crosses his arms and clicks his tongue. 

“You could check how the provisions are coming along for your journey home. If you happen to grab something to eat and take it back to your room while you’re there, well, you should both eat. You have a long journey ahead of you.” She saunters away, wine sloshing as she goes. 

He stands there a long moment, staring after the girl Yuuko had pointed out.  _ I don’t need to see him, _ he reminds himself. Then he remembers the abject horror that had befallen Fai’s face after the vision they’d both seen. It’s not as if he wasn’t upset by the holomessage but he can’t help but to think,  _ what does this have to do with me? _

Yes, it’s disconcerting to have it confirmed, mostly confirmed, that he was not born of flesh but metal. Just like Fai. And yes, he agrees with Yuui that creating them to grant some extension to the love he shared with his husband is awful but, that’s not his fault. That’s not  _ Fai’s  _ fault.

The girl Yuuko had pointed out turns a corner and with a snarl he takes off after her. The kitchen is close by and when he arrives he’s greeted by a less than friendly cook who shouts that dinner isn’t quite ready yet and to stop bothering them. In protest he swipes a piece of food from the counter when the chef isn’t looking. 

Trying not to think much of it Kurogane goes to Fai’s room. He distracts himself by trying to figure out what exactly it is that he’s grabbed. It doesn’t look like anything they have on the island but, it smells sweet. When he arrives at Fai’s room he looks up and stares at the door a long moment. He doesn’t know what to expect by initiating a conversation after what happened. 

Deciding he’s spent too much time lingering outside the door he knocks. When there’s no answer he knocks, “Hey, idiot!” More silence. “I, uh, I brought you food.”

This time, when Fai doesn’t respond he grabs the door handle, tests it out, and when he finds it’s not locked he lets himself in. Immediately he starts trying to explain himself, “You need to eat. We’re leaving tomorrow.” He stops short. The room is oddly still and on an initial once over he doesn’t see Fai.

“I didn’t tell you to come in.”

His head turns to the balcony where a sheer curtain blows freely. He steps forward, plate in hand as he approaches Fai. The veranda is round and looks out over the city where fire lights the main intersections of the streets. Fai sits perched on the bannister, his eyes concentrated on the view.

“Don’t fall,” Kurogane says as he walks over. He sets the plate down near Fai and turns to lean against the bannister. A moment of tense silence passes, there’s no good place to begin. “What we saw today,” he stops to gage Fai’s reaction. He doesn’t so much as blink. “That was fucked up.”

Fai looks at the plate and slowly he says, “It was terrible.” Kurogane expects more from Fai but, when he speaks again he looks to Kurogane. Hid face is pulled into confusion. “What is this?”

Some of the tension between them eases. “I have no idea. I stole it from the kitchen.”

Fai lifts the plate and sniffs it. “Smells good but, I’ll chance that later. I’m not very hungry right now.”

“You should really eat?”

“Have you eaten?” Fai asks raising an eyebrow. 

Kurogane looks away, “Chef says that dinner isn’t ready yet.”

Fai licks his lips and turns his face away, “Do you - do you really think that’s what happened to the ancients?”

“I don’t know,” he crosses his arms. “I’ve never thought about them too much. They were here, now they’re not, and we are. Nothing else ever seemed important.” 

He lets out a deceivingly pleasant laugh, “Yuui said you only look at the bigger picture.”

“No,” Kurogane is firm. “He said that about Youou.”

“Isn’t it the same?”

Immediately, “It’s not.”

“How can you be so sure?”

“I just am.”

“So,” Fai looks at him fully, “You don’t believe what Yuui said.”

With a sigh, “I didn't - I didn’t say that. Stop putting words in my mouth.” He searches Fai’s face, “I don’t want to but, they looked just like us...”

“I believe them,” he says this with a purposefulness that tells Kurogane that Fai doesn’t want to either. He holds Kurogane’s gaze. “If we were both born from metal it explains why we both have the Eye. It might even explain why your parents didn’t tell you... But, I can’t stop thinking about what it  _ means. _ ”

“About...” Kurogane’s voice drops in volume, “us?”

“Yeah,” the word is breathy and Fai looks away.

“Why does is have to mean anything about us?”

Fai’s face hardens, just a bit. “Did you feel nothing watching yourself die? Or-”

Kurogane scoffs. “I didn’t watch myself die.”

“We saw the same thing,” Fai argues.

“That wasn’t me and that wasn’t you.” Beside him, he can feel Fai’s upset. He turns to him. “Is that why you’re like this right now? You feel like you watched me die?”

“No, that’s not it” Fai pulls at his hair.

“Then fucking tell me what’s wrong. You didn’t lock yourself in here for no reason.”

“What’s wrong? You mean this morning or  _ after _ this morning?” Despite the weighted question the mood remains tentative in nature.

Kurogane rubs his face. “Let’s start with this morning. I’m not sorry for keeping the pendant from you but, I am sorry you found it. I planned on telling you but, I couldn’t.”

“Because you don’t trust me.” Fai’s voice falls flat.

“It’s not like that,” Kurogane shakes his head. “I wasn’t ready to face what it might mean that I had one too. I’m not dumb, I just didn’t want to deal with that while we’re trying to save our island.”

“Oh.” Fai’s voice is soft.

Kurogane sniffs, “I bet you feel like and asshole now.”

Fai lets out a small laugh, “Maybe a little.”

“What about you? I know it’s not that simple with you.”

“I’m not sure what to think. There are all these  _ thoughts _ running around in my head and I don’t know what to do with them. Last night meant  _ something _ to me. It felt good, not like  _ that,  _ but after and this morning before I lashed out. That was,” he sighs, obviously peeved at himself. “I thought - I don’t know. You  _ knew _ what having it meant for me as a child and learning you had one made me feel like we’d missed an opportunity -”

“For what?” Kurogane tilts his head. He’s not trying to stop Fai, it’s the opposite, he wants Fai to continue because this is the most Fai’s ever talked about himself. 

“To connect? To understand each other and maybe make me feel less,” quietly, “alone.” There’s a pause so short Kurogane doesn’t have a chance to fill it. “Then the  _ holomessage _ . Doesn’t it feel overwhelming to be  _ destined _ for something? My whole life I was  _ destined _ to be the High Oracle and now,” He buries his face in his hands with a groan. “Everything between us,” His voice has gained a little volume, “is so  _ intense _ . From the moment we met it’s like we were drawn to each other but, I thought that was a choice we were making. I was  _ choosing _ to go down that path and-” 

Fai shuts his eyes and puts a hand to his mouth, muffling his words. “It felt like the first choice I’d ever made for myself.” Kurogane meets Fai’s gaze, blue eyes cast up through thin blond lashes. “It doesn’t feel that way anymore.”

Kurogane feels suddenly on edge, “I told you, it doesn’t have to mean anything.”

He watches Fai swallow. “It’s not that simple for me.”

The way his chest feels hollow isn’t heartbreak. It’s feels like he’s mourning something that never even existed. He stands up straight. “If this is what you want, fine. But, before what we saw today nothing that had happened was destiny, it was just us.”

Fai won’t meet his gaze. “I’m sorry.”

Kurogane leaves, refusing to look back out of fear that Fai won’t be watching him.

 

* * *

 

They leave early the next morning. Their goodbye is short and Yuuko makes them both promise to return now that the journey is possible. Her men help them get the supplies out to where they’d left the Metalray just a few days before, they tether their full canoe to the Metalray, and start their journey.

Despite the lingering tension between them the journey isn’t awkward. They joke and bicker, never bringing up what they’ve seen or the conversation they had. Their unsaid feelings find each other in the softest way. Stolen glances, shy eye contact, restrained touches.

On their last night at sea they stay up talking. Fai laughs at a story Kurogane recounts from boyhood and Kurogane in turn feels something swell in his chest at being able to make Fai smile. As their laughter tapers off, his hand goes to his neck. His hair has fallen loose again.

“Hair bothering you?” Fai asks with humor in his voice. 

“Yeah.” Kurogane stops, his eyes flicking up to Fai’s face as he recalls the day they arrived at the Hitsuzen shore and the question Fai had asked him. “Can you braid it for me.”

For a moment he’s sure Fai is going to say no. Say they should sleep or joke that if he can keep his hair down that Kurogane can too. Instead is says, “Turn around.”

He does and Fai comes up behind him, his body closer than necessary. His fingers feel good in his hair, they did at his scalp, and form three sections. “You’re hair is soft,” Fai says as he works the stands. Quieter, “I meant to tell you that before.”

He finishes by using a thread to tie it off. His fingers linger but, his fingers pull away before Kurogane can think to say anything. 

Kurogane lays awake thinking about that moment until he finally falls asleep. 

 

* * *

 

Once they arrive at the island there’s no time to do anything other than answer the barrage of questions thrown at them by the Elders and the warriors of Suwa who had been waiting for their return. Within the first hour of them arriving the Suwa warriors are packed and ready to start their journey across the island.

Fai hardly has time to notice as Agis complains that the Suwa tribe was given more than their fair share of the medicine. He rolls his eyes listening to her until she stops short and he finds her looking over his shoulder. Following her gaze he sees Kurogane approaching from behind. 

“Leave me Agis.” With a muffled complaint she complies just in time for Kurogane to be close enough to touch.

“We’re leaving now.” His voice is deadpan.

His chest aches, he wants to say something to take away the parts of their journey that have made something that was intrinsic so difficult. Instead he says, “Safe travels.”

Kurogane doesn’t turn to leave. His hand raises suddenly and Fai flinches relaxing only when he realizes Kurogane has pulled something out of his hair. It falls away from his fingers and his hand returns, smoothing the strands that hand been tangled around it. Fai’s hair slides off Kurogane’s fingers as he pulls his hand away. “I didn’t want you to go with me to Hitsuzen,” he says as his hand drops to his side.

“You demanded I go, Kuro-liar.”

He scoffs. “I only did that because I thought they wouldn’t let you and then I’d be able to pick from my own men who would come with me.” Fai’s not sure how to respond but, he doesn’t have to. “They didn’t want to let you go but, you decided for yourself that you would. That wasn’t destiny, that was choice.”

Fai sees the blush come over Kurogane’s face and when Fai says nothing he continues.

“I’m glad it was you.”

Fai’s heartbeat goes from running to sprinting. Quietly, “Me too.”

Kurogane turns, “Okay men, let’s move out.” There’s a cheer from the Suwa warriors and then they start moving. Fai stands at the village gate and watches them leave until even their shadows are gone.

 

* * *

 

Between administering medicine to the ill and teaching the healers how to make it he hasn’t had much time to himself since returning. Exhausted, one of the elder healers tells him to go home and to return in the morning.

He  _ had _ started to go home but once he’d reach the treeline a thought had struck him. He turns on his heel and finds himself outside of Siben’s tent. He takes a breath, “Siben, are you up?”

There’s a rustle from inside and then Siben come to the tent flap and ushers Fai inside. “It’s late Fai.” They sit at a small table.

“I know, I’m sorry. I just - I haven’t been able to talk to you since I’ve returned.”

Siben waves him off, “I figured we’d talk soon enough. Not a lot of places to hide in this village.”

Fai smiles. “Siben, I wanted to ask you something.”

“Of course.”

Not knowing where to start he breathes in deep. “When we were in Hitsuzen I learned that Kurogane carries the same gift from the Masters that I do.”

“Oh,” Siben sits up straight.

“Other things happened and I still have a lot of questions, some of which I know will never be answered.” He continues, “But, there is one question I have that I think you have the answer to.”

Siben leans forward. “If I can offer anything, I will.”

Taking a breath, “The day the Masters opened their gates and I appeared, was I the only one?”

Slowly, “No. You weren’t.”

Fai had expected Siben’s answer but, he’s no less shocked. He swallows, “Can you tell me what really happened the day the war ended?”

Siben taps his fingers on the table. “The war was long and bloody. Both sides had lost many good men and couldn’t afford to go on but, there was no victor either.”

“I know, that’s why it came down to a duel.”

“Yes but, do you know how the war started?”

“There was an uprising within the village and-” he stops short, remembering what Kurogane had told him about his parents. “Kurogane’s parents were caught outside a sanctioned relationship. The Oracle’s made an example of them.”

Siben looks at his feet, shame evident. “That’s a forgiving way to put it. They took away Tsubame’s ability to have children, tortured Sachihiro, and left them both to die. They were able to lived but, the damage was done. Still, there wasn’t a war at that point. The war started when Sachihiro started a rally in the square. The Elders and Oracles of the time didn’t look upon this well and I can't even remember how it happened but, a riot broke out and when it was over with the eldest Oracle had been killed.”

“How does this relate to the duel?”

Siben looks to Fai. “Being the Warchief at the time I was the obvious choice for the duel against Sachihiro. I didn’t want to, I’d known him since he was a boy. His father and I had hunted together in our youth but, he wasn’t a boy that day. When I looked at him, I knew one of us would be dead within a few minutes. I’d hoped it would be me but, the Masters had other plans.

“Just before the duel began the Gate of the Masters opened and the two of you appeared. None of us knew what to do, for a while we just stared at you both. Tsubame is the one who spoke first saying you were both a sign from the Masters to cease our war. Afterall, the Masters had given back what we lost. A child, which Oracles had taken from Tsubame and an Oracle which had been taken from the village during the riot.”

Fai isn’t sure what to say and Siben’s silence tells him there’s nothing left to know. “Thank you for telling me.”

“I should have told you sooner but, we agreed to keep the tribes separate and feared the village knowing about the second baby, about Kurogane, would bring consequences.”

“You don’t need to explain anymore what you’ve told me is only important because I asked to hear it.”

Siben stands as Fai does and they hug. “Thanks again,” Fai says as he leaves the tent. 

That night, he doesn’t sleep. He lies awake in his tent with thoughts and images running through his mind. His people are safe. He travelled the ocean. He saw beasts become tame. He tasted desire. He saw the past. He saw heartbreak and death. But, mostly, he thinks for Kurogane and how he was willing to just let things end the way they did.  _ Was it really for the best? _

Groaning he pulls himself from his bed just as sunlight breaks up the darkness of the sky. He still thinks about Yuui and Youou. He can’t imagine what it would be like to love somebody so much that he’d risk everything to bring them back from the dead. If he hadn’t ended things would he grow to care for Kurogane that much? The thought scares him.

But, who else can he talk to and feel -  _ feel the same way I felt with him _ . He’d decided that destiny was too terrifying a possibility for him to accept and yet, he yearns for Kurogane’s presence. Kurogane hadn’t been swayed by destiny but, that makes sense he supposes. Fai’s the coward, not Kurogane.

His body knows where he’s going before he does. It’s a few hours after sunrise when he reaches the Gates of the  Metal Masters . Yuui had said there would be more  _ things _ stored here for them to see but, he hadn’t planned to seek them out. He wants to understand how they could love each other so much and without Kurogane to speculate with... 

Despite having been here many times over the years, he stands in front of the door and waits for something to happen. A voice. A light. A sign, even.

“It won’t open.”

Fai jumps at Kurogane’s voice. “Masters! You scared me!” It takes him a moment to gather his bearings. “What are you doing here? This is sacred, you could be killed for being here!”

“Who are you going to tell.”

“I’m not sure yet. Maybe Agis?”

Kurogane smiles as he approaches Fai. He leans in conspiratorially. “Did you come to see what Yuui left?”

“No,” he lies.

“Then did you come here to see me?”

“ _ Absolutely, _ not.”

“Liar.”

Fai rolls his eyes, “How do you know I’m lying?”

Kurogane puts a hand to his neck and scratches at the loose hair there. “Because I’m here for the same reason. I wanted to see you.”

“Are you saying you knew I would come?” 

Kurogane turns away from him. The sun catches the bronze in his skin like a jewel. He turns his face away, offering a profile view of his face - every line of his face is strong. Fai remembers what it’s like to touch him but, looking alone is wonderful in its own way.

He wishes he knew the right way to feel about them. Fai knows he  _ wants  _ but, he doesn’t know  _ what  _ he wants. Is it Kurogane’s body? His strength? His humor? His mind? His heart? 

Kurogane’s voice demands his attention. “I hoped you would come.”

“Why? I pushed you away. You don’t owe me anything.”

He shakes his head. “You don’t get it,” Kurogane mumbles before clearing his voice, “Do I need a reason to want to see you? I just do and not because some man from the past said I should want that. I wanted to see you because-” Kurogane’s face is going red and Fai can’t help but be embarrassed too. “Because I have  _ feelings _ for you, idiot. I don’t fucking know  _ why, _ Masters know I couldn’t have picked somebody more annoying but, there it fucking is.”

Fai smiles at how Kurogane is talking more to himself now than him. “You could have come to the village. We already broke the twenty year silence.”

Kurogane frowns like he hadn’t considered that. “Yeah, well. If I had done that who would have been here to stop you from doing something stupid?”

He laughs, “What exactly am I going to do?”

“Try to go in there,” Kurogane nods towards the Gate. 

“Isn’t that why you’re here?” Fai raises an eyebrow.

“No. What they had was in the past and even if we were made to be like them, we’re not. We can’t search for meaning in something we don’t understand and expect it to help us move forward. So, don’t look to see what they had. Look and see what’s right in front of you.”

He looks away, rolling his lips together as a smile comes over his face and his chest aches with the culmination of every feeling he’s had since meeting Kurogane. “If it is destiny, I guess it could be worse.”

He looks up and it’s like seeing Kurogane for the first time all over again. Except this time Kurogane wears a boyish grin and between them, stretched out over the years to come is a future full of choices for them to make.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I crawled my way to the end of this fic. My eyes did not want to stay open in my final moments of posting and as soon as it was done my head hit the pillow and I slept like a baby. Regardless of my troubles I want to TRULY thank you for reading. Like I said at the beginning this fandom has been a staple in many people's live for years. So much so that what a lot of people would consider a relatively 'dead fandom' is still able to put on events like this. 
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